Why do husbands make a woman crazy sometimes?!?!

Oh ladies I'm so glad that I came here tonight to read.  Thanks for all the laughs about everything.  I like tearing up the Vcard, you really got his attention, I can see the look.  I'm usually laid back calm but when I say a bad word or I say something different, I get the look like we better not cross her again. LOL   My dh sometimes leaves the cabinets open and why I don't know, it's just as easy to close them as it is to open them. 

Grannie

I really like the idea of tearing up the Valentine card.  Very effective.  Thanks for that concept, Isabella.  I am going to squirrel my Vcard away in case i need it in the future.

Patrice, "Mommy's home" is hysterical!!

Shirley, my hubby is a total fusspot about food.  He has all these "rules"--like: can't eat a hotdog on a hamburger bun when you don't have hotdog buns; the onions in the beefstew are cut "too big"; complaints about  how the food is too hot; certain foods only go with other certain foods; and on and on. I am a pretty good cook but i finally got sick of his fussiness, especially when i would make something for dinner and he wasn't "in the mood" for it, or he would bring home the lunch i made him because he preferred to buy fast food, junk or candy.  Since he has taken to watching Emeril on the food channel, i bought him his own Calphalon saute pan and told him to cook for himself from now on because it is better for fusspots to make their own food.  He has been doing that for several years now and i am much happier.

I just found this thread today---you guys are TOO funny. Want another fart story?



We were at a friend's house for dinner with my son and his then 2 year old son. The adults were all engaged in entertaining the 2 year old by singing songs with him when he produced a fart of epic proportions----didn't know a little kid could hold so much air to such musical effect. He very excitedly looked at all of us and announced, "I just made a zerbert with my heinie!" The adults in the room were no more good---had to go get kleenex for the hysterical tears rolling down our cheeks. EVERYTHING a two year old does is an accomplishment for them! (And he is a guy, after all. In love with his toots even at two years old!)



Have a good story to tell on my ex-hubby. I had proof of his philandering but couldn't say anything to him until legal papers were filed----so I sewed the fly on his "sexy" underwear shut. Same general idea as nailing the clothes to the kitchen floor---loved that one!



Thanks for making me laugh---you all are the best.



Jeannie

I remember reading a long time ago that one of Willie Nelson's (ex) wives sewed him entirely into the bedsheet when he came home drunk and passed out on the bed for the millionth time, and then she beat him with a broom. 

Amazing.... 

Good grief...my dh still can't remember my 11 year old's birthdate either! WTF?? I've decided that men are that way because they don't have estrogen. I used to be able to keep up with all 5 of our schedules and every little thing (like who likes gravy and whose socks are the ones with the red stitching, etc...) with no problem at all--never needed to use a calendar or anything. Then, I get thrown into chemical menopause and I do well to remember my own name. I told my rads onc that now I understand why men forget birthdays, anniversaries, to take out the trash...because the jumble I have in my head now must be what men feel ALL the time! He laughed so hard he nearly fell off his stool.

I used to think that someone would remember something if it was important to them and dh's "forgetting" was his way of asserting the fact that he didn't give a rat's patootie. Now, I'm not so sure. So, I give him a break because lack of estrogen is obviously a handicap! LOL

Diane 

I just found this thread and OMG ravdeb, we are brain twins. I have been telling people for years that the same reason you love your SO will be the same thing that drives you batty about them.

When I fell for my ex-husband it was because he was so stable. My family life was a bit crazy and I needed calm and rational. When we were married it drove me up the wall that he wasn't emotional enough. lol  Same trait different reaction.

On the other hand, my boyfriend can be so much fun. We both act silly and laugh a lot, but he gets some crazy schemes going in his head sometimes.....he's a dreamer who's not always realistic.  I think it's cute. Except on days when I'm cranky, then I think it's immature. Poor guys can't win.

I am also FINALLY learning not to try to make him "stand in" when I should be talking to my girlfriend or sister...something you also mentioned. It's funny how we've both come to those same conclusions.

Anyway, I have no hamper stories since we've never lived together BUT I happily haven't had the pleasure of hearing him "make music" from his heinie either. LMAO you ladies are cracking me up!

PS...I lived with my ex for almost ten years, and I will say about the hamper, he was really GREAT about putting his clothes there! And also, the kids stuffed animals, shoes, newspaper, silverware........I think that's how he cleaned while I was at work.

Just something funny, or not, DH came out with this week.

I am trying to get him to become more involved in doing his bit around the house, he seems to have a lot of spare time to sit around watching TV thru the day !

It gets to me when I am trying hard to catch up with things and he is sitting around doing nothing. I reckon if I get at him enough to help he will suddenly find a job to do outside, and leave me alone in my house !!!

I asked him to clean the sink and toilet, while he was waiting for his bath to run....OMG you'd have thought I'd asked him to chop his leg off.

'Why should I clean 'things like that' he shouted at me.

'Because you use both the sink and the toilet everyday, just like me'

His prize retort ??? 'Well, they've gone all these years without being cleaned, they don't look bad to me'

'all these years' is 25....WHO does he think cleans them daily, and what on earth state would they be in now after 25 years ?? eeewww, I dread to think.

I am sure he thinks I am lying when I say they're cleaned daily.

Isabella.