Christmas Blues

I am on vacation with the slow wireless so will have to take your word on the video.

I've been a bit "blue", but feeling better.  Finally got around to shopping and having my annual picture Christmas card made yesterday.  In my "google" search for writings on "routine", "same ol', same ol'" or "normal", make that "new normal" if there is such a thing.  I found this poem.  I found quite poignant.  Best to you all.

I'm late chiming in here--have been gone on holiday.   Christmas??  BAH, Humbug!   Did put tree up this year for kids and new grandbaby who came and we had an early celebration before we left on our holiday.   But, generally, Christmas is just something to get through!    I've never been a big Christmas fan, even worse after getting my dx right at Christmas a few years ago.

My heart goes out to Shirley...I have their website bookmarked and check it every now and then to see what's going on.   Fascinating!  While we were on holiday in Mexico last week, we heard of terrorist bombing in Algiers.   DH son is on staff at Univ in Oran, but spends half his time in Algiers--long story short--he was in Oran when the bombs occurred in Algiers.   But, two of his associates had just left their offices in Algiers--offices were completely destroyed.   A third associate suffered injuries but will be okay.   It is just too scary to think about--I have tried to reassure DH that his son (who I love as deeply as though he were my own) is living a life he wants and will have memories of this time forever--I want the little shi* to COME HOME!   But, as we all know--ain't no guarantees in this world--he could come back to the states and the proverbial bus could run him down!

I admire these kids for their zest for adventure and for living their lives to the fullest!   Gives us a few more gray hairs...but, the memories and stories they will have to tell from their rocking chairs!!!

best wishes to all for happy holidays.................

Humm, I just take Valium until it is over.  Not a very good idea, but it works for me.  Too many memories crowd in, no room in my brain.  All suddenly gone on the 25th!

It's a miracle!

Just being silly, hugs, Shirlann 

Odalys no you are not wrong for speaking your mind i feel the same way i loved the movie odalys yor are a dear swet sister and i love hearing from you i pray yor mother gets better true i am fighting to stay alive dont know how long i have left but i am trying to spend time with my family i will pray odalys everyday for your mother  hugs deb from ky   JESUS IS THE REASON FOR THE SEASON

Christmas to me is the spirit of God... and by that I mean,  loving and sharing and being who you truly are. It is a time of year to remember that there is more to life than struggle and pain.

Yet, this year, I do feel sad. I feel a sense of loss. Disappointment. And I can't stop thinking about my diagnosis... my prognosis.... and then my family. It is sad and unfair. So has this robbed me of the spirit of Christmas? No. It has made the spirit stronger. I want to love and share until it hurts. Until I am spent. To let everyone I love know it. Because, we might not be here next year. Not just me, but those I love may too succumb to something. We just don't know.

This is what cancer has taught me. We are just vapors in the wind and we do not know when life will end. We forget this in our daily lives. I certainly did before my dx. But now, I am reminded that life is uncertain so we better live it now and celebrate.

So I have the spirit of Christmas. The true one. And even though I feel sad at the losses this year, I am grateful I am still here to share and love

Wendy A

Isabella--you said it all so eloquently!  I've already Bah Humbugged Christmas--damn!  Totally forgot about NY Eve!  DH has committed us to travel to a NY Eve party with a lot of years' long friends congregating to be together.  (It will literally be an adults only 3-night slumber party!!--fun, but soooo tiresome!)  

And, you are so right--they ALL assume that since "I'm cured" I can still keep up with all that goes on--and, I will be expected to look and act like I am having fun!    I will be cheerful because I now have something to look forward to--I love your reference to "a flop out day"!!  THAT is exactly what I will be looking forward to!!!!   I'll send you cyber hugs that evening!!!! 

for all of us with the Christmas blues...a little bit of humor...

Fun (Naughty) Things To Do At Christmas
by DG Bradley


1. Randomly replace one bulb in your neighbor's lights so they
    no longer work. Repeat this every day until Christmas.

2. Wrap yourself in swaddling clothes and lay in the manger of
    the neighbor's nativity scene.

3. Put on a Santa suit and open a mall kiosk that sells reindeer
    jerky and Easter Bunny filets.

4. Call Park Rangers in your area and tell them Rudolph is sick.
    Ask if you can borrow one of their reindeers. If they tell you
    no, then yell at them telling them they are heartless bastards
    for ruining Christmas for all the children around the world.

5. Wear a Santa suit to the nearest red light district and stand
    on the corner saying "Ho!" as women walk by.

6. Get a job as a mall Santa and then tell all the children that
    they've been naughty and won't be getting any presents this
    year.

7. Create snow sculptures in your yard of snowmen in suggestive
    poses.

8. Buy a package of Keebler's E.L. Fudge Sandwich Cookies and
    hand them out to children saying this is what happens to the
    bad elves.

9. Decorate your yard to look like a sleigh and eight tiny
    reindeer crashed and burned. Walk back and forth along the
    street muttering, "Oh the humanity."

10. Get a job playing Santa at a corporate Christmas party and ask
    everyone if they'd like to see some naked pictures of Santa
    with the Boss's wife.

11. Sell jars of water, advertising them as Frosty the Snowman urns.

12. Get a job as a mall Santa and then tell all the children
    they'll get what you give 'em and that's that!

13. Get a job as a mall Santa and then tell all the children
    you're sick of the milk and cookies crap and you'd prefer a
    beer and a hot blonde instead.

14. Sell Grinch-skin rugs.

15. Stand on a street corner selling dime bags of mistletoe.

16. Post a sign in front yard that says "Carolers Welcome." When
    they get almost to the front door turn on the sprinklers.

I personally like number 8 LOL. 

Love and hugs all around...

I look at my children who are rich in spirit, health and smarts, and yet I feel a twinge of sorrow for them this holiday season. For them and there friends too. Sorrow for my disease which like many of you graciously say above, robs my old spark, zest, idealism, and indefatigability.



Instead of presents of Fad Clothes, or new Xbox games, I wish for them more earthly peace. I have had tremendous anxiety over the Middle East situation for years now, ever since our entry. Will my children be robbed of life from physical draft there? Will they be robbed of security here in the States? Will they be robbed of simple givens, such as apple pie, Mom and the American dream if things go to south here in the USA?



So, this holiday I have talked with them about less: getting less, donning less "with it" clothes, traveling less due to the devalued American dollar.



And I have talked with them about more: doing more, playing and working harder, and doing it all more efficiently, which always was the backbone of success in America, drawing on our individual strengths of creativity to surely contribute when our Countries time comes, and it will. More leadership risk may well be needed, and my boy has it in him.



And I pray and hope for them and for yours, for all children that American life will remain a semblance of what you and I had growing up: a sense of generosity of spirit, mission in life, faith in one another and safety.



My thoughts this Christmas Eve Day,

Tender