please stop minimizing my diagnosis

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  • lynne4
    lynne4 Member Posts: 98
    edited December 2007

    I also was diagnosed with DCIS. My local Dr's all told me it's just "precancer" but we want you to go see some specialists. The specialists I had were very professional and very caring. I still hear those original words in my head though. I had to go through mastectomy, reconstruction, meetings with oncologists, tests, etc...

    I was at a fitness camp and the instructor asked if there were any bc survivors and at that point I didn't know whether I should raise my hand or not. Recently I found this web site and am very grateful that I did. It really helps me understand that yes I should have raised my hand! I should not feel ashamed that my cancer was not as aggressive as someone elses. My wish is that none of us would have to go through this. 

  • SISKimberly
    SISKimberly Member Posts: 762
    edited December 2007

    Barbie,

    If only people didn't feel the need to put things into categories. Cancer is Cancer no matter what type or stage. We all go through the same roller coaster ride of emotions. Yes, some are in a better place than others, but we are all in this together. I have Infiltrating Ductal Carcinoma. Three seperate tumors in the left. I just had my bilat last Thursday, and feel lighter-figuratively and literally- now that the cancer has been removed. Still face both chemo and radiation and welcome both...what's the option?



    Mimi, so sorry to hear about your Mom's recurrence.



    Yes, men do get breast cancer, but the rate is far less than in women. My father had breast cancer.



    Good luck to all of you wonderful ladies.

    Your SIS (Sister in Survival)

    Kimberly

  • msannie57
    msannie57 Member Posts: 84
    edited December 2007

    Barbie--I coordinate a mentoring program for women with breast cancer.  I'll have to say that after 5 years of doing this I think that DCIS may be the most confusing and difficult diagnosis for many women.  The options are so many and research is changing the choices daily.  While other stages of breast cancer may be more immediately life-threatening the treatment options are many times fairly cut and dried.  Not so with DCIS.  And there's been a radical change in women's reactions (in this country) from doing nothing for something sometimes seen as "precancerous" to having an immediate bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction. 

  • markd
    markd Member Posts: 31
    edited December 2007

    Well now I think I will join in. I am a man, yes a man and I was dx with DCIS in October. Was I scared, yes scared sh**less. Was I confused when I was told "its not as bad as u think" , very confused. I still hear things that confuse me, 80% does not turn bad. Well I had 7mm of the crap in my nipple only, now I have lost my breast (and it does effect us men too) and have a nice large scar to remind me every day. Im 37 yrs old, fit and yes MALE. Doctors , surgeons etc need to be educated on how to help us deal with this form of Cancer that whilst at initial DX may not be as bad as stage 4 but as we know here can one day end up that way. By telling us not to worry, etc etc does not help unless we can see hard facts.

    My rant over now

    Love tou u all

    mark

  • Fireweed
    Fireweed Member Posts: 189
    edited December 2007

    From San Antonio:

    1100] Unexpected effects of reassurance in women with low-risk breast cancer.

    Griggs JJ, Corbin K, Weiss M, Shields CG. University of Michigan, Ann Arbor, MI; University of Rochester School of Medicine and Dentistry, Rochester, NY; breastcancer.org, Narberth, PA

    Objective: Patients with low-risk breast cancer are often told they have a good cancer. The purpose of this study was to investigate the impact of this form of reassurance on distress and concerns about recurrence in women with ductal carcinoma in situ (DCIS) and early stage invasive breast cancer. Methods: We conducted an anonymous survey on the website of breastcancer.org, a non-profit organization. The survey inquired about disease and treatment characteristics and contained the Positive and Negative Affect Scale (PANAS) and the Concerns about Recurrence Scale (Vickberg, Ann Behav Med 2003). Participants were also asked if they had been told by any of their medical providers that they had a good cancer or favorable cancer Analyses were performed to investigate the impact that being told one has or had a good cancer and feelings of reassurance, isolation, distress, guilt, and concerns about recurrence. Results: A total of 646 participants with localized or regional breast cancer (n = 323) or DCIS (n = 323) breast cancer completed the survey. Being told that she had had a good cancer was reported by 62% of women with DCIS and 32% of women with invasive disease. Among those told they had a good cancer, 59% reported that being told this led to their feeling moderately-to-extremely reassured. A high percentage of respondents (29%) reported feeling minimally reassured by this phrase. Many respondents also reported moderate-to-severe negative responses to being told that they had a good or favorable cancerfeeling moderately-to-extremely isolated (21%), distressed (40%), scared (45%), or guilty (20%). In addition, among women with DCIS, the good cancer message was associated with greater level of concern about recurrence, controlling for age, time since diagnosis, surgical treatment, and mental health (p < .005) Conclusions: Although telling patients they have a good or favorable cancer leads to feelings of being reassured in many women, such terms may also contribute to distress, feelings of isolation, and guilt among many patients who otherwise might enjoy a good prognosis quality of life. Providing reassurance is a complex process. Further research into effective ways of communicating reassurance is warranted in order to minimize distress and enhance quality of life.

    Thursday, December 13, 2007 5:00 PM

    Poster Session I: Treatment: Psychosocial Aspects (5:00 PM-7:00 PM)

  • faithandfifty
    faithandfifty Member Posts: 10,007
    edited December 2007

    Barbie and DCIS club..... I'm a member, too and have had all of the various reactions described by Fireweed's survey above. The 'good' cancer????? How is that possible???

    Being an entire 8 months into the process & treatment I know that I still must wage a battle to reclaim my energy and enthusiasm -- on a daily basis. With the rigors of surgery & radiation complete, I now must work as diligantly to get my head around all of this.

    I feel very fortunate to embody the bumper sticker: "Early detection saves lives." I think those of us at this end of the spectrum can use our energy to walk-the-walks on behalf of our stage 1,2,3 and 4 circle. Using our experience to cry out for those more involved.

    This is the best place for ranting, crying, screaming and educating. People here 'get it.' Since today is my birthday, I've given myself the gift of reflection. I've learned a lot about myself in these months. I'm stronger than I ever thought possible. I can reach out when I need support. I can use my experience to inform others. A pretty amazing 'gift' in the face of illness.

    For all of this growth I am grateful. I'm grateful to those of you who have held me up & I attempt to offer that same encouragement to others just joining the dance.

    Strength and courage for the journey!!

    faithandfifty-ONE!!

  • Beesie
    Beesie Member Posts: 12,240
    edited December 2007

    Faith, Happy Birthday!  I'm a 1956 baby too, just a few months ahead of you.

    Fireweed, how interesting that they have a study on this issue.  My conclusion from the study is that the message for someone who has DCIS should be a combination message, sort of what Barbie (and the others here) have been saying, but also what Rose said.  DCIS is a breast cancer that needs to be taken seriously and treated as any other breast cancer, but the good news is that it is early stage breast cancer and because of that, it will require less treatment than many other cancers (no chemo!) and it has an extremely favorable long-term prognosis.  I think something like that would be a reasonable message that would get across both the severity of the situation but would also provide reassurance.  Actually, that's pretty much the message that I got when I was diagnosed.

    Now if only we can get all the doctors & cancer associations (and I mean all of them, incl. Dr. Love) to stop calling DCIS "pre-cancer".  DCIS is pre-invasive cancer but it's not pre-cancer.   Someone who has DCIS has cancer cells in her (or his) breast. The only difference vs. IDC is that the DCIS cancer cells happen to be still contained within the milk ducts and haven't yet broken through to the breast tissue.  To me, calling DCIS pre-cancer is a lot more concerning (and wrong) than saying that DCIS is "the best cancer to have".

  • Wren
    Wren Member Posts: 324
    edited December 2007

    I agree, Beesie.

  • nik
    nik Member Posts: 34
    edited December 2007

    hello again....what the he_ _? i had stage 0 non invasive. after 1 mammatone biopsy followed by 2 lumpectomies followed by bilateral mastectomy and a sentinel biposy of the lymphnodes. i was told they got it all...that i do not need chemo, radiation or tamoxifin? i am currently undergoing reconstruction...started my first fill today....

    but i can't help but wonder????????? how do they determine who needs what? should i always be concerned for quick recurrence? when will this end?

    i have an appointment with oncologist the 18th...what questions should i be asking??????????? please help

  • prayrv
    prayrv Member Posts: 941
    edited December 2007

    Faithandfifty,

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!  Sorry I missed your post yesterday. 

    Nik - do you have your pathology report?  In that report should show your er/pr status and other factors that the oncs will be looking at.  If you are premenopausal, and er/pr +, the treatment of choice would normally be tamoxifen.  Everyone's dx is totally different from everyone else's. 

    In my case, I don't think that this will ever end, but will probably lessen with time.  IMO, cancer is cancer, whether stage 0 or stage 4.   

    Take Care

    Trish

  • Barbie7
    Barbie7 Member Posts: 386
    edited December 2007

    Beesie, you hit the nail on the head, and the whole reason for my rant.  I was reading some information on the Komen website and BAM!  There was that Pre-cancer statement and I flipped out.  I am fortunate that my surgeon and those that I've dealt with face-to-face have balanced the message of early stage with the seriousness of the disease and the appropriate treatment.  It is the authors and websites that talk about pre-cancer that really make me mad.  It is a good thing my team doesn't take that point of view, because with my hormones (went off pill after 23 years) and my Scorpio temperament - look out!

    Faith - Happy Birthday!  I hope you make it a great week and a great year.

    Mark - I'm sorry to hear about your diagnosis.  You are right, this disease DOES effect men as well, and I'm sure you have found tons of information geared at women, but only short chapters geared at men.  Not to mention all the pink ribbons.  I hope we can be of some help to you here. 

    Nik- Hopefully your onc will be able to answer your questions on the 18th. I found by reading this site and a few books, that treatment is different for everyone.  Hang tough.

    Barbie

  • SISKimberly
    SISKimberly Member Posts: 762
    edited December 2007

    Markd,

    Hey, my father had breast cancer when he was in his erly 50's. He was asked to be involved in a study regarding new treatments-radiation and chemo. He too has a scar from his mastectomy, but he's doing great-in his 70's now. I know it's a scary prospect...be informed and be your own advocate. Cancer in my opinion is cancer-there is nothing good about it. But you've found a place where you will be heard and comforted if needed. As Barbie stated, know we are all here for you.



    Your SIS (Sister In Survival)

    Kimberly

  • karol61
    karol61 Member Posts: 128
    edited December 2007

    Barbie,

    DCIS is cancer and it needs treatment. I'm very tired of the term precancer,it is an error made by out of date health professionals. The national cancer institute calls DCIS cancer, and I am very glad my mammo showed it at an early stage.

    Saw my rad onc yesterday, she was awesome, she treated my DCIS seriously as did my breast onc.

    Take care,

    Karoline 

  • Beesie
    Beesie Member Posts: 12,240
    edited December 2007

    Karoline,

    If only it was only out-of-date health professionals who call DCIS pre-cancer. 

    Dr. Susan Love is one of the most respected breast cancer specialists in the world, and here is what her website says:

    "What is ductal carcinoma in situ (DCIS)?
    As more women have gotten mammograms on a regular basis, DCIS has been found far more often. DCIS is a noninvasive precancer. It is not life threatening. If you have DCIS, it means that you have abnormal cells in the lining of a duct. While virtually all invasive cancer begins as DCIS, not all DCIS will go on to become an invasive cancer. An invasive cancer is one that has the potential to metastasize (spread). Right now we have no way to determine which DCIS will go on to become invasive cancer and which will not. That's why doctors recommend DCIS be treated.
      http://www.susanlovemd.com/breastcancer/content.asp?CATID=0&L2=3&L3=2&L4=3&PID=&sid=164&cid=40

    Similarly, as Barbie mentioned, the Komen site refers to DCIS as pre-cancer.  This is another highly respected breast cancer information source. 

    And the National Institute of Health also calls DCIS a pre-cancer:

    "Ductal carcinoma in situ (DCIS) is a noninvasive, precancerous condition in which abnormal cells are found in the lining of a breast duct. The abnormal cells have not spread outside the duct to other tissues in the breast. In some cases, DCIS may become invasive cancer and spread to other tissues, although it is not known at this time how to predict which lesions will become invasive."  http://www.cancer.gov/cancertopics/pdq/treatment/breast/Patient/page2#Keypoint8

    That's the problem.  Many of our doctors do consider DCIS to be cancer, but unfortunately with some respected sources still calling DCIS pre-cancer, it will be a long time (if ever) before we get the whole medical community on board. 

  • louishenry
    louishenry Member Posts: 417
    edited December 2007

    Pure DCIS is not benign, but it is not malignant. Invasive cancer is malignant. Oncologists should probably give up on the pre-cancer word and just start calling it pre-invasive or a pre-cursor to invasive cancer. Personally, I was OK with it being called a pre-cancer. I suppose I would have felt differently if I had a different course of treatment.

  • Gulfwater
    Gulfwater Member Posts: 177
    edited December 2007

    Since diagnosis five years ago, I have always liked Imaginis for information:

    http://www.imaginis.com/breasthealth/dcis.asp

    Mary D.

  • PSK07
    PSK07 Member Posts: 781
    edited December 2007

     Beesie - that quote is exactly why I don't have a copy of Dr Love's book. Reading that at the outset of my BC journey had me so upset the book went right smack back on the bookstore shelf.

    My path report noted malignant cells and everyone, from my internist who gave me the dx, to the oncs treating me now have called it cancer. Curable cancer, but cancer nonetheless.

    One of my hot button issues - right up there with I must have done something to 'cause' my cancer.

  • Beesie
    Beesie Member Posts: 12,240
    edited December 2007

    I don't like the term non-malignant any better than I like the term per-cancer.  I also don't think it's accurate. 

    DCIS is made up of malignant cells which are, at the time of diagnosis, contained within the milk ducts.  These cells are

    1) growing uncontrollably (one of the definitions of a malignant cell; the grade definitions for DCIS are no different than for other cancer cells) and 

    2) spreading and invading more and more territory within the ductal system (another definition of a malignant cell).  DCIS is notorious for moving around within the ductal system; that's why it's so important to get good margins and that's why many women are found to have large areas of DCIS within their breasts. 

    At the time of diagnosis, DCIS cancer cells are contained within the milk ducts, have not spread into the surrounding tissue and therefore cannot spread to other organs, but these cells do have the inherent ability to do that (another definition of a malignant cell). All it takes is one cell breaking through the milk duct and the full potential to metastasize is unleashed. 

    Pam, Dr. Love's definition of DCIS is one thing that turned me off.  Another is her position on fibrocystic breast condition, which she feels is a meaningless term because it covers too many different conditions.  I have fibrocystic breasts and I couldn't disagree more strongly.  I've had pretty much every condition associated with having fibrocystic breasts.  Over the years, it's really helped me to know that I don't have a whole bunch of different problems; what I have are different symptoms of a single problem.  Also, knowing which conditions are associated with having fibrocystic breasts made it much easier for me to deal with something new when it turned up.  Of course I'd always get any new condition checked out, but knowing that it likely was yet another symptom of having fibrocystic breasts, I was able to avoid panic.  So it seems to me that Dr. Love does a disservice to women with breast problems with both of these positions that she takes.

  • Lucy1234
    Lucy1234 Member Posts: 289
    edited December 2007

    I agree

    I am 29 and dx in Oct this year with stage 0 grade 3 DCIS. I had a bi-lat mastectomy because of the size of my DCIS and family history. For anyone a mast is a massive thing but at my age I just feel awful. I had a reconstruction but I have no nipples and am badly scared for life on my back and chest.

    I asked my surgeon if there were any cancer support meeting groups in the area? She just said bluntly "But you don't have cancer!"

    Great Hey! You kind of feel like you are cheating

  • Gulfwater
    Gulfwater Member Posts: 177
    edited December 2007

    Poppy, WHAT?  Unless her surgery skills are something extraordinary, time to find another surgeon.

    Mary D.

  • koshka1
    koshka1 Member Posts: 678
    edited December 2007

    I just had an wire excision for ADH cells so I am hoping I don't have DCIS or anything else....

    However, while I am getting the wire inserted.  The radiologist went on and on about how I should go out and drink champagne this weekend to celebrate.

    I am like what r u talking about?

    He said cause you found it early. ( Ummm...ok. )  I told him my other biopsy said ADH so hopefully this surgery will prove nothing else.  He then went on and on about DCIS and that it is okay to have cancer ...you just need to stay on top of it.....

    I just about decked him....had my boob not been squished in mammo at that time,,,it would not have been pretty for him!!!

  • DWS43
    DWS43 Member Posts: 56
    edited December 2007

    Barbie I understand what you are saying.  The first time I was diagnosed with DCIS in 2004, I felt like a warrior, I went through 1 lumpectomy and 2 re-excisions and radiation.  Although I had a high grade I totally believed my doctors when they listed the positive statistics and told me I was cured (I questioned the use of that term but was assured all was well).

    When I was diagnosed with DCIS in the same breast this year I was angry.  Now I struggle with all those statistics and wonder what I should believe.  I opted for a double mastectomy w/ reconstruction that failed but I have done all I know to do.

    I don't take DCIS lightly.


    D

  • OldOakTree
    OldOakTree Member Posts: 173
    edited December 2007

    I'm here with a slightly different perspective.  Was diagnosed 4 1/2 years ago, had good margins on the first try so no re-excision, small, intermediate grade so no radiation and my doctor said in my case the risks of Tamoxifin outweigh the benefits.  I guess you could say I have cancer "extra light" or maybe cancer "extra lucky."  Yet not a day goes by when I don't worry about recurrence and not just local recurrence but distant.  From the day I was diagnosed until I got that first Lexapro in me 5 months later I cried daily, sobbed is more like it.  My doctors were totally perplexed as to why I fell into such a deep depression when it was caught so early and thousands of women would give anything to be in my place.  They told me over and over how lucky I was and to get out and get a life.  So from the start I was made to feel that I had no right to feel the way I did when others were so much worse off than I.  Yet I did feel terrible and I got NO support for this from anyone, family, friends, doctors.  The general consensus was that it was small, early and I'll be fine.  Still, I had a hundred unanswered questions in my mind, such as "how do you know there is no more in me?"  Just a couple of weeks ago I mentioned to someone that I still worry about this and she said, "Why? that was years ago, you were cured!"  I'm sure her words were intended to reassure me but they hurt and showed me that she didn't understand.  It was as if she thought you can get bc ONCE and I had it my one time and now I don't have to worry about it for the rest of my life.  Because I didn't have a mastectomy or radiation and am not taking Tamoxifin does that mean I have an even lesser bc?  The way I look at it I have an even greater chance of it coming back as I HAVEN'T had radiation to kill those pesky stray cells and I DIDN'T have a mastectomy (or even a re-excision for "good" but not "excellent" margins) to remove nasty breast tissue and I'm NOT taking Tamoxifin to ward off any future occurrences. There is very little support for someone in this position and quite honestly it is lonely fighting the battle alone.  My doctor tells me she knows many who have been treated in the same way as I but she can't produce one name.  The one support group I went to, I left feeling like a complete misfit and at the same time scared to death that I would be back someday joining in on their conversations of chemo and ports.  I even feel like a misfit here because I can't talk about reconstruction or tamox side effects or sunburn from radiation.  What right do I have to complain when others are going through worse things than I?  I feel as if I am supposed to be so grateful that it was caught when it was.  Okay, I am grateful, very grateful.  But does that exempt me from being scared out of my mind that it will come back with a vengeance in the future?

  • mittmott
    mittmott Member Posts: 409
    edited December 2007

    OldOakTree, feel anyway you want.  I know where you are coming from, and I didn't just have dcis. I had invasive, but very small early stage 1 first time, 6 yrs ago.  Had lumpectomy, and rads.  Told i didn't need mast, lumpectomy was just as good.  Don't worry, i was told, the odds of me getting it again was close to 0..Well here I am, 6 yrs later in the same breast.  Had to have mast, and chose bilateral. Was diagnosed with dcis, but doc was shocked and found a small microinvasion so, here i was again with small, very early found idc. Twice now... They told me no chemo, because of size of tumors, so here I sit, waiting for the other shoe to drop.  My body obviously wants to make this cancer, I keep finding it right away, because I'm always on top of it, but with no mammos anymore, and with only mri, I hope they can still find things in time.  My onc said she doesn't need to see me, because I'm on no treatment, and I'm wondering who will order blood tests and scans for me?  I can tell you no one ordered any annual scans or blood work for me the first time, unless they thought a node was enlarged., and that was once, so you are right to be worried.  I don't live in fear, I go on with things, but it's always there, the cancer  is going to come back, and people in our position don't understand it.  They think we are cured.  Be happy, and be more greatful..  I am very greatful, but there is always the nagging in the back of my mind. Randi

  • sherry7
    sherry7 Member Posts: 200
    edited December 2007

    Every single comment made above is so correct.  Since, I got the "good" cancer, dcis, almost but not really cancer, precancer, I have lost one breast and have lymphedema for the rest of my life, I would say that we have all been lied too, don't smooth my feathers, tell me the truth.  DCIS sits at the devils dinner table right along with the rest of the cancers out there changing and taking our lives.  I hope that someday they can redesignate its explanation because it is on the way, in development of becoming an invasive cancer if you don't do anything to it.  So, in my opinion, its kinda like the "almost pregnant" type of thinking.  It has a date it becomes life threatening and violates everything sacred about our bodies and spirits, it challanges us, makes us ill and gets smarter everyday.  DCIS should be described more like in development or in the process of:

    Bless you all, cancer has turned my life so upside down I am on diasability at the age of 52.  Yeah, DCIS, the Good Cancer....

    be well and fight the fight as the warriors we all are!  Sherry

  • carolsd
    carolsd Member Posts: 358
    edited December 2007

    No one, but no one, can really truly put themselves in someone else's shoes. Yeah, it's tempting for me to say "I wish I had had ONLY DCIS..." because having had 3mm of invasive is a concern to me. I feel, in my place, that if I had 100% DCIS I could rejoice. But that's really only if I *thought* I had IDC and found out later it wasn't... I would be very happy, I'm sure. But for those who have never had a diagnosis of invasive, DCIS must feel very scary anyway. It all depends on where you are and where you've been. That's perspective.

  • Beesie
    Beesie Member Posts: 12,240
    edited December 2007

    OldOakTree,

    I think your perspective is very consistent with the theme of this discussion.  Yes, DCIS is the "better" breast cancer to have.  Yes, some cases of DCIS (and some cases of small, low grade IDC) don't require all the treatment 'big guns', but that doesn't mean that emotionally it's any easier to deal with DCIS than any other cancer.  I think that's an important point in all of this.

    Looking at what we much ensure physically, I do understand the perspective of an oncologist who says that we're "lucky".  I wouldn't want any oncologist to say that to me and hopefully most have enough common sense to not say it to any DCIS patient, but I do understand why an oncologist might think this way.  From their perspective, considering the range of patients they treat and considering the treatments that they must prescribe for patients with later stage BC, DCIS patients are "lucky". 

    I wouldn't however understand any surgeon saying the same thing.  From a surgeon's perspective, the surgery that we must undergo for DCIS (or early stage IDC) is the same as what someone with later stage BC must endure.  In fact, in many cases our surgeries are more extensive. Mastectomies are more often required for early stage BC because this may allow us to forgo radiation and/or hormone therapy. Those of us with large amounts of DCIS don't have our tumors shrunk with neoadjuvent chemo; mastectomy is our only option.  On the other hand, someone with later stage BC will require radiation, as well as chemo and probably hormone therapy; as a result, they get fewer 'benefits' from having a mastectomy and are more likely to have a lumpectomy.  They may also be prescribed neoadjuvent chemo to shrink their tumors so that a mastectomy isn't necessary even for those who start out with a larger tumor.  So surgically, DCIS patients get the short end of the stick.

    Then there is the equally important emotional side of things.  This is where I think the repercussions of downplaying the seriousness of DCIS most affect us.  Emotionally DCIS is cancer.  Along with a DCIS diagnosis comes all the fears associated with cancer.  Too many health professionals (and laypersons) don't understand this.  A DCIS patient requires the same emotional support as any other cancer patient.  To suggest that we have a 'lesser' cancer or to make us feel out of place among 'real' cancer patients shows a lack of understanding of how any cancer diagnosis affects the patient.  This is very hurtful to DCIS patients.  Emotionally there is no good cancer.

  • PhyllisCC
    PhyllisCC Member Posts: 397
    edited December 2007

    Hi,

    I'm three weeks post op having rt mast because of widespread DCIS.  My left breast was biopsied and was benign.  I am on a little roller coaster myself.  Very thankful that all my tests were great, negative nodes, no spread.  My surgeon pretty much said no need to see me unless I develop symptoms in the "good" breast.  However, I insisted that I wanted to meet with an onocologist just to go over any other options (I'm ER/PR+) As soon as she saw that I wanted more info (and just didn't want to leave and get a mammo in 6 mos) she agreed it would probably make me more comfortable and made the arrangements for the appointment.  My point is I think some patients may want to hear, "you're okay,".  But many of us want more info to make an informed decision.  So we need to be a bit more insistent. The next day I met with my PS telling her all my good news and then started bawling.  Me, who should have been celebrating the good news.  She was great and explained that no matter what kind of cancer, we're up and down emotionally, it is very natural and would probably continue for quite some time.  At no time did she make me feel bad that I was crying about the "good" cancer.  And I AM very grateful that I have a cancer that is very treatable. Phyllis 

  • twink
    twink Member Posts: 1,574
    edited December 2007
    Oldoaktree...I want to hug you.   It's tough, I know.  As I said up there, for some the news is worse (and harder to get in perspective) than fpr others.  At the end of the day, this isn't a competition abou who has the worse prognosis...it's about how we learn to cope with our own, very personal situations and how the non-BC world perceives us.  We all deal with those who don't really get it.  I imagine that camp is larger with a DCIS diagnosis although, to a great extent, I expect, the non-BC-knowledgeable community just doesn't get it, PERIOD.
  • lewisfamily503
    lewisfamily503 Member Posts: 621
    edited December 2007

    I just want to add my two cents to this thread. I just remember by surgeon calling me with the news: Ductal In Situ CARCINOMA. Now it was that last word that made my hair stand on end and cause my hearth to skip a beat. Of course, I immediately researched the heck of DCIS on the internet. I actually felt a bit guilty telling my family and friends about this diagnosis. One person even remarked, "well at least it isn't cancer." I opted for a double mastectomy (long story) and have felt a bit guilty when people offer their sympathy. I mean, I don't have to go through chemo or radiation and let's face it, at this point, I hope to be pretty much through with it, based on my diagnosis. However, I totally agree with Twink. "At the end of the day, this isn't a competition abou who has the worse prognosis...it's about how we learn to cope with our own, very personal situations and how the non-BC world perceives us. " Anyway, Chin up girls (and guys)! I have decided that it really doesn't matter. Breast cancer is breast cancer. Those people that love you will support you and that is all that really matters.

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