November rad girls check in here!!

Well, I've had 11 treatments out of 33 at the "Glow 'n Go" plant.  The treatments are Monday through Friday and I chose to go at 8:30 am each day.    The time it takes for the actual treatment is minimal.  The routine is that I drive to the Dubs Cancer Center which is about 5 miles from home.  I have my car sticker that allows me to park in the "For Cancer Patients Only" area.  I then check in at the front desk.  I don't have to sit in the main waiting room.  I go immediately to the gown room to don the usual clinical gown that doesn't fit.  I made a treatment top for myself.  Quite lovely and cozy warm.  I sit in that room with beautiful handmade quilts with pieces in memory of women that didn't survive the journey.  There are numerous books on encouragement, spiritual enlightenment, faith and hope.  There is usually another woman waiting and immediately you're bonded.  Many of the women have clearly undergone chemotherapy prior to the start of the radiation series.  They wear scarves.  Their faces are drawn, though they make attempts to smile.  Every age, every size, every kind of look in their eyes.  We all wish each other well.  Several women completed their series of radiation since the time I began of November 12.  They leave the room with a new sense of confidence and hope.  A hope they'll not experience recurrence and not have to be in that room again.  A technician comes to the gown room to escort me to the treatment room.  I walk down the long hall, turn the corner and all I  see are bright yellow signs warning me of the radiation hazard.  I then walk into the treatment room which is cold.  Not only in temperature, but in appearance.  I lay down on the steel table and I am positioned to have the rays go where they're supposed to.  Talk about trust! A huge machine, showing red lasers, comes over my body.  The technicians leave the room!  Wouldn't I like too as well.  Each of the three zaps last about 30 seconds.  I can't feel anything and there is only a slight sound effect.  The technicians help me sit up because my back is frozen stiff.  I then walk out of the treatment room and head back to the gown room.  I dress in street clothes.  I check out.  I walk to my car.  I sit for a moment and the reality of having breast cancer overcomes me.  I walk through the fear, take a deep breath, and thank God for all I have.   With gratitude to all of you for your continuing love and support! Ruthie    

Ruth,

You say it all so well . You touch my heart.

Tomorrow will #20 for me and I can see light at the end of the tunnel! 

     Terry
 

hello all!

well, 21 down 7 to go, I should be done next friday 12/7. I have developed a small blister right on my bra line, so no more bra for now; and also a small blister in my pit area. The onc gave me some stuff called Radi-Gel, it's mostly aloe-vera. It seems to help. I just keep telling my self, one more week, one more week. Hope I can hold out!

Hope you're all felling well!

It's Thursday and that means I get to chat with the onc doc.  I don't think he'll be able to answer some of my questions, or he'll simply preface his response with, "typically..."  There isn't anything typical about breat cancer or each woman's experience.  I'm glad to report that I haven't had much pain, BUT - I cannot complete a thought and have a total lack of interest in stuff.  Time to go for my zap. Ruth  

I met with the medical family therapist before my tx yesterday and let it all out. What a relief!  I'll see her each week and try and get back on track.  For a type-A, do-it-all, have-it-all woman, acknowledging illness is the hardest thing I have ever had to do.  Taking care of myself is job 1. She volunteered to send a note to my rad onc telling him to listen when I say I want to take most of December off. (I have the leave built up, so it isn't a problem.) 

The boob is definitely getting pink and it looked like there was a little blister on my incision line.

Doctor day today. Yesterday was another x-ray and distance measurements.  13 down today!

Ruth, take care of yourself.  I hope it all goes well.

Going today for my 5th round!  Cried and was mad as hell after the first two - don't ask me why.  It just hit me I guess--you know that I have bc and had to be there at all.  It has gotten easier since.

I seem to have a lot of muscle aches and pains that the onc doesn't seem to associate as a SE of rads, but why else I'm having them I don't know.

Feeling a little sore, but no redness and trying to get the aloe vera on every day at least twice.

My support group is still with me, but very few of them, if any, seem to understand how I feel.  I get the distinct feeling that everyone thinks I'm ok because my bc was "only" Stage 1.   Most everyone fears and understands the se's of chemo, but when you talk rads to them they seem to think it's a walk in the park. 

I don't want pity, or even compassion.   I just don't want my feelings to be dismissed.  I express my true feelings less and less, because nobody seems to understand why I am still afraid.

Sorry to be in the dumps -- its gray outside.  I think I need some sunshine (that,  or a very large glass of wine )

I am checking in! I had my first radiation Nov. 14, I now have 25 more to go. So far so good. For me radiation is easier than chemo. I live 10 minutes from the hospital. The Cancer and Wellness Center is very pleasant, and I am in and out in less than 15 minutes. I have a question for those of you who are ER+/PR+: Have you started the hormone treatment yet, or are you waiting till after radiation? My med. onc. and rad. onc. are leaving it up to me. I am not sure what is best, and would appreciate some input!

Lise

I am so happy that I found this group.  I started radiation 2 days before Thanksgiving.  I am from South Carolina but am having treatment at Duke. I have wonderful family support but they are not here now.  This is all very tough!  I am Stage 3C, ER+/PR+/Her2+.  I have 2 types of breast cancer.  I had bilateral mastectomy after neoadjunctive chemo.  The left was a large tumor Her2+, but was not in the nodes.  The right, not Her2, had 2 small tumors with node involvment, over 10 positive.  The left was almost obliverated with TCH but the right did not respond.  I study a lot and the current news is that ER+ does not respond to the taxanes.  There is doubt that there is very little response to any chemo.  They are talking about doing Adriamycin after radiation but admit that there may be very little benefit.  I am afraid of the heart toxicity associated with Adriamycin.  I am back on Herceptin every 3 weeks but Arimidex was not offered until after radiation.  After 15 years of HRT, I am anxious to start hormone suppression.  I have had slight nausea past radiation tx.  So far my enegy level is alright except on the day I had Herceptin.  I am 60 and grew up during the Cold War.  We had air raid drills and scary films about the bombs coming with the horrible radiation.  Now I lay under a machine receiving radiation.  I told someone today that the great part of cancer fear is the treatments.  We do get through them but our life is altered.  I greive the active life I once had.  I was a ballroom dancer!  Now I enjoy watching.  Thanks for this subject.  I will be glad to hear how everyone is doing.  Janice   

I had one onc prescribe Arimidex for me to start before rads; my second onc said it was up to my radiation onc.  My radiation onc said to wait until rads were done before starting.

6th round today.  A little nausea, some soreness, lots of nerve pain yesterday.

Hi All,

I have been on arimedex since august. I began rads at the beginning of November. I noticed no difference in my arimidex SE since the beginning of rads. RADS are soooo much more difficult for me than chemo.. I think it is the daily reminder that I have this bloody disease. Wiih chemo I could pretend all was well after the first week of each round. Fourteen more to go.



Hugs to all!



Steffi

I agree that the treatment for everyone is so confusing.  Due to a very low Oncotype score (11) I did not have chemo and will complete radiation then do AIs for 5 years plus.  My breast surgeon (considered to be one of the best in the US) is handling the entire treatment along with the radiation onc.  It is so confusing to talk with others who have a different treatment.  As far as the rads, I am at 20 and have only the slight redness.  Good luck to everyone.

Hi all,

I finished the "double zap" on Friday (25 treatments) and now go in for 8 boosts starting today--hurray!

When I went in for the simulation last week, the technician told me that they wouldn't bother with any tattoos this time, they'd just draw the markings on me.  I'm also getting quite peely now, so they gave me some foamy bandages to put on the more sensitive areas.  Well, to make a long story short, they drew on me, told me not to scrub that area to keep the drawing in tact, stuck on the bandage, and wouldn't you know, when I took off the bandage to shower this morning, I took off a whole layer of dry skin, including most of the markings!  I have no idea if they'll go through with the boost today, or send me back to the simulator.  How annoying!  Oh well, at least it doesn't hurt.  Looks pretty raw, but it doesn't hurt. 

My mind is in a...relatively....good place at the moment.  I'm not as tired as I was two weeks ago, which is great.  I certainly feel less dragged down and am starting to think about what I'm going to do with all the extra time I'll have in a couple of weeks! 

Sending you all healing (and cooling) vibes,  Lisa

Im jealous of you burquie!!!!  I am only starting my 2nd week ARGHHHH!!!  So far so good skin wise. 

Lisa is that normal for the boosts then about marking you all up?  See, Im already thinking of those and my boosts dont start till Jan 8th. 

Kiwikan  I feel the same way about hormone treatment and am really thinking about not doing it at all.  The drug itself is a carcinogenic, and their are alot of quality of life issues at stake for me.  My father had a stroke so I am afraid of that, plus other things about it.  Its like I would worry like mad just after swallowing the darn thing.  Thats no way to live.  Of course theirs that question of what if the cancer comes back if I dont take it BUT the flipside of that for me is, What if I get another cancer or stroke or osteoporosis?  Thats just the way my mind works.  I am a what-if worry wart by nature and my mind keeps on ticking.

I start my 8 boosts on Thurs. so only 10 more to go.........Yeaaaaaaaa

I am peeling for the 2nd time and my husband asked me how many layers of skin do you have....lol

I`m pretty well burnt and was told that larger bust women have more burning than smaller, I find the nipple is so tender and am using aquaphor on it, the onc nurse told me it will take about 2 wks. for the burns to heal after rads are done, I start on arimidix after rads and not looking forward to it, been doing a lot of reading and it scares me, somtimes I think we are better off not knowing all of this stuff.

Thanks Steffi, hope I do as well on arimidix as you are.