My Brother Passed Away

Hi Pepper,

I am so sorry for your loss, Your brother sounds like he was a wonderful man. Welcome back to the boards, This is the best place to come for comfort. Let us know how you are doing and I will pray for you sister. Tears and prayers for you.

Sherry

Hi, Pepper.  Your post made me so sad.  I am very sorry about the loss of your brother.  Your last words "How will I live my life without him..." brought to mind a post I read on the pancreatic cancer board that I thought was beautiful.  This woman posted to another woman who had just lost her husband, but I think her words can be applied to any situation where we lose someone we love and are left with an empty void.  It truly touched my heart and maybe it will touch yours as well or help in some small way.  Here is her post:

"First, let me offer my sympathies to you on the loss of your husband. Second, in answer to your question as to what are you to do with your life-the answer is simple. You will live. I am 55 and have liver cancer, inoperable, incurable, but treatable to some degree. However, it will get the better of me sooner or later. I asked my husband shortly after I was diagnosed this year what he would do when I died, and he replied that he would probably just stop taking his heart meds. I told him that was really stupid, I haven't spent the last several years doling out his pills every day, worrying about him trying to help him control his diet, etc, just for him to give up and die. Since your husband was a live life to the fullest type, I think the best way to honor his memory would be for you to carry on in the same sort of way. Think of your life as a large basket-when you and your husband were together and happy the basket was full to overflowing with good and wonderful things. Now it's empty and hollow and it probably seems there are no good things to put in it. But every day you get up, put one foot in front of the other, take your basket and find something to put in it. Family, friends, pets, hobbies, things you never thought about being interested in but might be. as time goes by, your basket will be full again. It will be different, but it can still be good. I know you are in pain now and it's a deep, wounding pain, but it will subside, so live your life and enjoy it as much as you can. I wish you the best. "

I wish I could say it was good to hear from you again, but the circumstances forbid that. I'm sorry. I hope that time will do its magic and you will find comfort and peace with your loss.

Dear Pepper, what a lot of grief in such a short while.   I am sorry to hear about your brother.  Your pain is so raw just now--may it ease with time.   Sending you a PM.     junie

Pepper,

I spent today with my two brothers and at one point looked at them and had that thought you expressed..."how could I live without them". I am too, sorry beyond words. I can't even begin to imagine how you must feel. I am lucky to have not lost any of my five siblings yet.

My best friend lost her identical twin sister to brain cancer four years ago in April. It was very, very hard for her especially when their 40th birthday came only 5 months after she passed.

Just take the time you need Pepper. One day, each day will get a little easier. Your sadness will always be there but, eventually, you will smile when you think of him..... when the pain you are feeling turns to cherished memories, more often than not.

I am so sorry for your loss.

Sincerely,

Traci

oh i'm so sorry.   holding you and yours in my prayers tonight.

big hug from your neighbor to the South (pdx) 

Pepper,

I'm so sorry for your loss.  My thoughts are with you and your family.

Pepper- So sorry to hear this. I hope you find comfort
in the special memories you shared with your brother.

Mary

Pepper,

It's so good to see your name here again, but the reason why is so sad. You're right to come here for the support you need. We are here for you, girlfriend! Just take one day at a time. Hell, one minute at a time. Remember to breathe and nurture yourself through this time of grieving.

Love you bunches,

Anne

Pepper..I'm so very, very sorry. But you know..you WILL live without him. You will live with his good memories. Try to store those in a special place in your mind and take them out now and then and just remember those good things. I hope that helps you.

Oh Pepper I'm SO very sorry! How awful for you.

I pray that day by day the pain gets a tiny bit less.Time DOES heal.But it's slow.

Sorry.

joan

Pepper, I lost a brother several years ago ... sometimes the pain is still enough to bring instant tears, but for the most part, I have to trust that there is a God, and heaven, and that's where my brother is.  It felt like a limb was cut off when he died, also from cancer.  I pray for your healing and hope these posts bring you some comfort.

Hugs

Pepper,

I am so very sorry to hear about your brother. I know that at this time, there are no words that can take away your pain. I am praying that God will send you and your family comfort and peace.

hugs,

vicki 

Pepper;

  I don't know what to say... words cannot express how sorry I am.

Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers.

Wendy A

Pepper

Sorry seems so inadequate.  There are no words---could not help but think about your special relationship with  Stacey today.

Such a rough year you have had.  Damn this disease.

You are in my thoughts and prayers

(((hugs)))

Susie