Do you ever stop and think, “I have cancer?”

Honey I feel it everyday. I understand! May you nip it in the bud and be able to move on. I am hoping that you’ll see you’re a strong beautiful woman. You will always be that. No matter what. Stage one has excellent prognosis sweetheart... you’ll be strong for your family. And Be in it for yourself also. Fight on !

Yup. I'm 4 1/2 years out of surgery, 4 out of active treatment and I still have those "Cancer? Really? WTF!" moments (or hours).

This is going to be a long answer so....here goes....

First off, today is 9/11...it’s a day of mourning and reflection...today is a day of celebrating surviving too. Even if each day seems sufferable because of loss, it is also a day that reminds us of the resiliency of humanity....

Surviving....what does that require of us? A whole lot. If you stop for a moment and look around a crowded area, whether it be an auditorium or a cafeteria or even a playground, you may be struck by its normalcy. But, if you strike up a conversation with any one of those random people, you might be surprised by what they have to say.

Yesterday, I had one of those conversations at my local car dealership’s garage. I had flippantly told the scheduler that I love my car due to the ease of getting in and out of it. Was a great help when I had my hip replaced last year. Then, she told me how much her hip hurt. I said, “Girl, go see a doctor TOMORROW and take care of it. As we age it gets harder and harder to live pain free. It requires a lot of work. You owe it to yourself.” And then she said to me, “I am a 17 year breast cancer survivor. Even if it means I have to get my hip replaced, I know I am not afraid and I can do it!”

Wow! Talk about resiliency! You just never know what others are going through. What others are surviving. How everyone is getting through a day... it is a miracle.

If it gets too tough for you, talk to your team. Join a support group. Come here and stay for as long as you desire.

When I was first diagnosed, more than being afraid, I was more pissed than anything else. I didn’t want to be a cancer patient. I hated the word oncology. Over time, a long time, I slowly got used to the word cancer attached to my name. And then, as I moved away from active treatment, the word cancer slowly moved away from my name. Why? Because life happened and I was too busy living my life to care about cancer. From time to time, I do get reminded of it. But those reminders are fleeting.

The worst time of year to be a cancer patient, not like there is a good month, is October. Breast Cancer Awareness month stinks! For 31 days you are reminded of breast cancer while being treated. That month requires body and mind armour!

And lastly....for many of us, breast cancer is a very treatable disease. When you are in that abyss, please tell yourself that breast cancer is a very treatable disease. While it is sad that each year we lose too many and even one is too many to lose, there are MILLIONS of us who survive and thrive. And that is because of the resiliency of humanity....we are all out there figuring out each day how to choose living...

You will get there! I promise

I’ve never been angry, but I don’t get angry often. Scared. Not feeling well. Not angry. I’m an optimist. I look for silver linings, know there are worse situations, remain grateful for all I have and accept. I can’t relate to anger.

Ya it's really some BS isn't! One of my new favorite soapboxes is ---look at all the people walking around with heard diseases or type 2 diabetes, these are also serious diseases- but no one acts like they are going to drop dead at any moment. ( I could write a 10 pages rant on this but I shall stop)

It really chaps my behind that those of us who have chemo lose our hair. Sometimes I would like to have a cancer free afternoon - but can't do that because my lack of hair is right there to remind me. Bah.

This will be my first October with cancer. I supposed technically speaking it was there last October but I didn't know...anyway. I thought the whole pink stuff was dumb before - and now it will probably make me want to punch someone LOL No I don't want to buy your pink MLM product of which 2 cents goes to Komen. :-)

aln82 - A sad but necessary thread. I'm more than a year from my diagnosis and I still have moments where I tear up and think, "Cancer. How is that possible?" And I'd have told you that I would never make it through chemo. But I did and you will. And remarkably, you get back to life where it hovers but isn't in the forefront every day. Still, it's there. I had to cancel out patients for a CT scan and one said, "I'll be glad when you don't have to do tests or anything any more." And all I could think was, "That may never happen."

But. It has deepened my work as a psychologist and made me more aware that you can't always tell what big physical issues people are going through or have been through. But that's later. Right now, you need to focus on you. Know that there are lots of people here cheering you on!