Almost official

Good morning Einga!

I'm so sorry that you find yourself here with a cancer diagnosis looming. Shame on your doctor for implying bad. Wes, but not giving you information to prepare for your appointment. I highly recommend readin the excellent articles here on BCO to learn more about the types of BC so you understand your diagnosis. I came here for the first time when I googled "Worst type of breast cancer". When my doc called with the biopsy results I understood them completely and that helped me a great deal. You will likely have to take time off for surgery. I had a lumpectomy and took 2 days off from work for that. I was able to do radiation treatments during my lunch hour. Good luck at your appointment. This is truly the worst part, it all gets better once you know what you're dealing with and have a treatment plan in place

I actually think it's good to start to get your head around the upcoming diagnosis. It won't be a shock when you hear it in person (and having someone with you to listen/take notes *is* a good idea). Like above, I think I took two days off of work for surgery, and scheduled my radiation appointments either lunch-time or late in the day. Treatment centers are pretty good at working with you to minimize the disruption to your schedule since they're five days a week. I'd done enough research here on BCO that I knew what treatment would be recommended, so no surprises there. I didn't bother with a second opinion. Most of us get a diagnosis with a predictable treatment plan, so unless you don't trust your medical team, I don't really see the need.

As I said, I’ve never seen anyone who wasn’t grade 2 or 3. ER+ is good—that gives you another tool to help prevent recurrence. Your HER2 test was probably equivocal, so they’ll re-test with FISH. That might take another week to get results. If it’s negative and the tumor is < 2 cm, they’ll likely do an Oncotype test to see if chemo would be beneficial. Many women don’t need it. If it turns out HER2+, that’s also good in a way. A little more treatment, but also really good outcomes, specifically because of Herceptin. For many women, the first decision they have to make is whether they want a lumpectomy or mastectomy. That’s probably all you have to think about for now.

Survival rates for early stage cancers are great. One step at a time. You’ll know more after you meet with your BS.

I was 46 when I was diagnosed with an aggressive cancer (Stage IIIA, Grade 3, triple positive), and I'm still here five years later, cancer-free! Please try to take things one step at a time. Ingerp is right; think about your surgical options first. Most breast cancer patients do surgery first. If you feel overwhelmed, maybe a lumpectomy would be easier for you. I chose a lumpectomy because I needed to be there for my kids (two of whom have autism and are high-maintenance) ASAP. The lumpectomy has a shorter recovery time, and I was back at work part-time the day after my surgery. ((Hugs))

Also keep in mind that if you end up being HER2+ and needing Herceptin, it is not a chemo drug. It's a monoclonal antibody that doesn't have *zero* SEs, but really minimal (and many women don't have any at all). You would get it with whatever chemo treatment you have, and then every three weeks for the balance of a year (so one year total). The FDA also recently approved a subcutaneous version (shot rather than IV), but it's not yet in general use in this country (but has been in Europe for quite a while). That would make everybody's life easier.

Who says you lay in bed and do nothing? WRONG!! Yes, you may feel lousy a day or 2 after chemo and you may NOT. Some ladies worked full time during chemo. If you feel crummy that’s when you call those who asked what they could do to help. Carpool the kids. Make a meal. Help you grocery shop, or have it delivered.

Tell her, and tell her to enjoy herself.

Hi Eigna, I had the treatments they described to you: lumpectomy, radiation, and hormone therapy. They did something called an "oncotype test" on my tumor to give it a score between 0 and 100. In general, lower scores mean you don't need chemotherapy, although it depends on whether there was lymph node involvement as well. I had clean lymph nodes and a low oncotype score, so didn't need chemo. My whole experience, from the initial mammogram to the last day of radiation, took 16 weeks. I don't know if that was a typical timeframe or not.

You really are in the most difficult part of this experience emotionally, knowing it's cancer but not much more about the type, spread, or treatment plan. Once you learn those things your brain will be able to focus again and you'll be able to think about practical matters like freezing meals, child care arrangements, etc. You might feel better about telling your mom once you have that sort of information too. You may even be able to hold off on some of your treatments until she's back from her trip, or you may even be done with treatment by the time she has to leave.

It's Saturday morning now. All the offices are closed and there's not a thing you can do or any more information you can get until your next appointment, so as much as you can, put cancer at the back of your mind and let yourself be distracted by all the normal Saturday and back-to-school activities. You WILL get through this.

Oh my goodness, May? That is crazy! You must be exhausted. I hope things accelerate for you from here on out!

I had 20 treatments, 5 days a week for 4 weeks. I had wonderful friends and family who insisted on bringing me meals, which was so lovely, but if I'd had to I could have managed on my own. The main thing was fatigue; I'd go to work (part time) and then go to treatment and then come home and just crash on the couch for the evening. But I think if I'd really HAD to push myself to keep going, I could have. I'm single, so it would definitely have been harder with kids around. During that waiting period, a friend who'd been through it told me not to think about it except for those moments when I had to. Much easier said than done, of course, but she had a point.

Hang in there! Soon you'll be at the end of the waiting and wondering and then you'll feel like you're making some progress. The stage you're in right now, waiting for a plan, really IS the hardest part of the whole ordeal.

Hi Eigna,

I am sorry that you are going through this. I can promise you that this is the worst time. The waiting is nightmarish. Once I knew what I was dealing with and had a treatment plan, I felt so much better. Once you see the breast surgeon, things will go quickly. You have your surgery, then wait for the pathology results. Then they can tell you what treatment you will be needing. You may very well not need chemo, but if you do it is not the nightmare I thought it would be. It wasn't pleasant, but it was doable. I worked part-time throughout. I found radiation to be a breeze. I worked full-time and really had no symptoms whatsoever. Hormone therapy is usually for 5 years, although some do 10. I was nervous about the hormone treatments, but aside from a little stiffness in my joints, I have not noticed any difference. It is not a fun time, but it does get better.