What to tell my kid?

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grayskies
grayskies Member Posts: 52
edited August 2019 in Just Diagnosed

I am going through a divorce, so I don't have emotional spousal support. I have a ten year old, who is sometimes quite immature for his age, but is very smart.

Just this morning, I received the biopsy result of DCIS. I am having an MRI next week, then meeting with a surgeon for a consult.

How much information do I give my son?

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  • Beesie
    Beesie Member Posts: 12,240
    edited August 2019


    While no diagnosis is good news, if it's going to happen, DCIS is the best news. It's Stage 0, and some doctors consider it to be a pre-cancer. Others don't, but that might be one way to frame the discussion so that you are being honest, but not scaring your son.

    This write up on DCIS might help you frame the discussion: https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/68/topics/790992

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  • Ingerp
    Ingerp Member Posts: 2,624
    edited August 2019

    My kids are older than yours, but I think it's even more important with younger children to frame this as no big deal. Both times I've had a breast issue (three, actually--I had ALH 10 years ago), I've waited until I had a diagnosis and treatment plan in place, and then told them I had a little something going on with my breast but that I'd be fine. The reality is you *will* be fine--you just have a little treatment coming up before you can put this behind you. And at that age, I wouldn't use the word "cancer" with DCIS.

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited August 2019

    Hi grayskies, and welcome to Breastcancer.org,

    We're so very sorry to hear of your diagnosis, but we're really glad you've found us. As you can already see, our Community is a wonderful source of information, advice, and support -- always with someone willing to lend some help.

    In addition to the advice from the members above, you may find it helpful to read this page from the main Breastcancer.org site on Talking to Older Children and Teens, which offers some practical information on sharing this news with your son.

    We hope this helps and we look forward to seeing you around the boards!

    --The Mods

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