Will I ever sleep again????

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hodgepodge
hodgepodge Member Posts: 92
edited August 2019 in Surgery - Before, During, and After

I had BMX on 4/23. I was so worried about having to sleep on my back because I am a lifelong stomach sleeper. I bought a wedge pillow and a variety of others. I was surprised that I slept pretty well during the first 3 weeks or so after surgery. Now I'm realizing that must have been due to the pain meds and healing. Sleeping is getting harder with each fill for my tissue expanders. Now, every night I am miserable. I can't even toss and turn. :( I'm really starting to regret the decision to reconstruct.

I've eliminated caffiene, no electronics after 8pm, tried melatonin, Calm magnesium, meditation and upping my exercise. I'm at a loss and am feeling so irritable all the time. I get a decent night of sleep every 6 days or so because I'm so tired and then it's right back to the same thing.

Any advice?

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  • SimoneRC
    SimoneRC Member Posts: 419
    edited June 2019

    Hi hodgepodge!

    So sorry you are having such troubles sleeping! That stinks!

    Are you not sleeping because you are uncomfortable or because you are not tired/brain not turning off? I am a side/stomach-ish sleeper. I put a king sized pillow next to me lengthwise with bottom elbow/knee underneath and top elbow/knee on top and slept on my side with my hips and legs more like when I am on my stomach. I also made sure the pillow was in the middle of my chest, between the expanders. I also always slept, and still do, with a front zip sports bra.

    You did not mention if you are on AI or Tamoxifen. Some of the ladies here report troubles sleeping while taking them. I have seen many women here saying they switched the time of day they take the meds to help with sleep.

    I hope you find a way back to some good zzzzz’s

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  • hodgepodge
    hodgepodge Member Posts: 92
    edited June 2019

    I have spent my whole life sleeping on my stomach and being on my back makes me feel like I'm going fall off the bed. I had been taking the bra off so I'll try to keep it on tonight to see if that helps. I'll try the king size pillow also! Maybe if I lean my face into it that would help? I have to say that I think being on my back is making my wrinkles less noticable! At least the crease that came from being a stomach sleeper. *silver lining!

    I am starting AI this week. Ugh. Hope that doesn't make it worse.

    Thanks for the reply.

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  • SimoneRC
    SimoneRC Member Posts: 419
    edited June 2019

    I hope it helps hodgepodge!!!!

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  • AliceBastable
    AliceBastable Member Posts: 3,461
    edited June 2019

    I only had a lumpectomy, but I had another major surgery on the same side just a few months later. My sleep solution was a futon and a LOT of pillows, so I could hold everything in place and not be tempted to move around. I basically built a custom nest. I still use it occasionally when things start acting up and I find myself tossing and turning to try to get comfortable. Once I'm in the nest, I'm fine. I think it works like swaddling.

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  • edj3
    edj3 Member Posts: 2,076
    edited June 2019

    I do feel for those who are stomach sleepers. It was bad enough being a left side sleeper (surgery was on the left side). I cannot imagine even now nearly 8 weeks out that I could lie on my stomach. Takes my breath away to think of it!

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  • ElaineTherese
    ElaineTherese Member Posts: 3,328
    edited June 2019

    I'm a stomach sleeper, too, so I feel for you. Could you get a limited prescription for Ambien or something else (e.g., Ativan or Xanax) to help you sleep? When I was doing chemo, I suffered from serious insomnia because of the steroids. MO prescribed Ativan so I could sleep during those "steroid high" nights. Once I finished chemo, I stopped taking Ativan and went back to my usual sleep patterns. Good luck!

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  • moth
    moth Member Posts: 4,800
    edited June 2019

    I've put a plug in for this before on this board but will mention it again - the Sleep with me Podcast kept me snoozing like a baby all through treatment. I still use it now during stressful weeks at school or when the hotflashes keep waking me up.

    He tells the most boring dull stories in approx 1 hour episodes. I cue up 9 + episodes just so that if I wake up, he's still there droning on. I even have favourite episodes - which is weird because I've never heard more than about 10 min of any of them and yet there are some that I like more than others. Scooter himself says it doesn't work for everyone but for many of us, it's like magic. https://www.sleepwithmepodcast.com/

    I now support him on patreon because he's helped me so much. You can try the podcast for free :) I used plain regular earbuds for over a year but recently bought sleeping headphones which are like a headband with flat small speakers....

    hope you find something that helps!

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  • debbew
    debbew Member Posts: 226
    edited June 2019

    I'm a stomach sleeper, but I find I can sleep on my back when I use a weighted blanket (if you try that, go bigger rather than smaller). Not sure if that might irritate you chest, though.

    You might also try time-release melatonin, and if you are comfortable with it, time-release valerian. Those have both helped me stay asleep longer in the past.

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  • hodgepodge
    hodgepodge Member Posts: 92
    edited June 2019

    AliceBastable, I have a nest right now on my bed. Hardly room for my husband! :) But it just isn't doing it for me.

    I like the idea of the weighted blanket! I am definitely going to give that and the podcast a try! I've never heard of sleeping headphones. Genius!

    For those of you that used prescription sleep helpers - did you find they made you drowsy the next day? Of course that would be any different than how I am now. I feel like a walking zombie from lack of sleep. Just curious how long you feel the effects from those.


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  • SimoneRC
    SimoneRC Member Posts: 419
    edited June 2019

    I take Xanax. Out of my system in 6 hours so no hangover in the morning.

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  • ruthbru
    ruthbru Member Posts: 57,235
    edited June 2019

    When going through treatment, I tried everything and nothing holistic worked at all. Since you can NOT cope if you cant get a good night's rest, I finally got a prescription for Ambien. I did not feel groggy the next day, mostly I suppose because I actually got some good sleep! Now, many years later, I sometimes take an over-the-counter sleep aide called Unisom when I have trouble sleeping & find that works well for me.

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  • sbelizabeth
    sbelizabeth Member Posts: 2,889
    edited June 2019

    Ambien was probably more important to my recovery than chemo. I was in the throes of menopausal insomnia when I was diagnosed and the fear/anxiety made it worse. I felt zero shame in asking for a prescription to help me get more than 2-3 hrs of sleep every night. I usually took 1/2 tablet and it worked. No morning grogginess at all.

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  • ElaineTherese
    ElaineTherese Member Posts: 3,328
    edited June 2019

    Ativan worked for me with no grogginess in the morning. I worked through chemo, so I needed a good night's sleep to function at work.

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  • hodgepodge
    hodgepodge Member Posts: 92
    edited July 2019

    Sleeping update:

    I tried Sonata but it made me dream crazy stuff the whole night. I did sleep, but woke up tireder than ever.

    I created a pretty good nest of pillows and that helped some. We went mattress shopping this weekend and have almost made a decision. My mattress is really old, so I'm hoping that might help.

    Yesterday I had my last TE fill and my chest was so tight and sore last night. At some point in the night I put a pillow on my chest and next thing I know I woke up this morning. It kept my mouth from falling open :) and maybe the weight of it was helpful? I am going to go get a weighted blanket today and try that.

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  • robertson120
    robertson120 Member Posts: 3
    edited July 2019

    Stomach and back sleeping both are not good for the health. Side sleeping is the healthiest sleeping position to prevent back pain.

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  • hodgepodge
    hodgepodge Member Posts: 92
    edited July 2019

    I would love to sleep on my side but the tissue expanders don't agree with me :)

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  • CBK
    CBK Member Posts: 611
    edited July 2019

    Hodgepodge

    I feel for you. I don’t think I ever really slept on my back... it actually gives me major anxiety! I think the weighted blanket is an excellent idea but you should be able to sleep on side with TE. I had those damn things in for over a year!! I would sleep on a couple pillows under my head and then prop a king sized pillow by my side lengthwise and my TEs were supported and not smushed.

    Like Moth described I’ve listened to sleep hypnosis audio on iTube that is super effective, by Lina Grace and Jason Stephenson. Really works.

    Ambient make me more jittery.. strange but it happens to some. I found Ativan to take edge off and not to give me a hangover. I tried melatonin and I was shocked how much that zonked me a lot. With a next day hangover.

    It’s true sleeping on your cheeks really does cause you more wrinkles. Reminding me to buy some satin sheets.

    Good luck to you on you reconstruction and sleep!!

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  • hodgepodge
    hodgepodge Member Posts: 92
    edited July 2019

    CBK, I'm going to try the sleep hyposis you recommended tonight!

    I know that it SHOULD be possible to sleep on my side but it feels the TE is pinching my underarm. I roll over in my sleep and wake up with a sharp crampy pain. :(

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  • CBK
    CBK Member Posts: 611
    edited July 2019

    Hodgepodge

    Are you sure it’s the expander? Maybe post something on recon boards and see what people say.

    I think I blamed some things on reconstruction that was actually the BMX. Could be cording. ...but if the pinching is expander someone will have experienced it on recon boards and may have some words of wisdom!

    Good luck let us know what works!!

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  • hodgepodge
    hodgepodge Member Posts: 92
    edited August 2019

    Things are getting a little better. I'm finally able to kind of prop myself on my side and the weighted blanket is definitely helping. I really appreciate everyone's advice and encouragement!

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  • debbew
    debbew Member Posts: 226
    edited August 2019

    Thanks for the update, so glad things are getting better!

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