Spirituality Outside Of Organized Religion

JoE777 · February 2019

DearLife · February 2019

Mrs. M. you hit the nail on the head when you said “ People are worried about Google and Alexa. What about God?!!" (Although I still mentally duck when I “take his name in vain!")

santabarbarian · February 2019

I was actually sort of kicked out of Sunday school. My parents did not send me; I only went because a few of my friends were doing it. But I questioned the truth and logic of every Biblical story and raised my hand to object to them. "That does not make sense. Nobody would survive being eaten by a whale." I think I went two or three times, and when the teacher couldn't deal with me, I concluded "this is for the birds." I was probably 7.

I have never had God's surveillance in my head. But I do have a very developed moral conscience... just never feared being 'watched.'

leftduetostupidmods · February 2019

And who's watching the watchers?

Anyway, the issue of purity cannot be generalized. Not all religions have the same reasoning behind it. You can't compare the requirement that a young woman be a virgin to be sacrificed to the Aztec Gods with the requirement of purity for Christian nuns (or the equivalent in other religions) or with the same requirement in religions that see material needs of the flesh being in the way of reaching a transcendent spiritual state.

pupmom · February 2019

Santabarbarian, but what about Santa Claus, lol. "He knows when you are sleeping. He knows when you're awake. He knows if you've been bad or good, so be good for goodness sake." I actually did worry about that guy for a few years!

JoE777 · February 2019

Seachain, I'm not sure I understand your comment on purity. Help me out I didn't intend to infer purity of the sacrifice although that may be. Catholic nuns are required to live a chaste life not virginity since many that become nuns aren't virgins. Not sure about nuns in other world religions

DivineMrsM · February 2019

DearLife, I, too, try not to say “the Lord's name" in vain. It's been ingrained in my thinking for too many years. I'm of the generation that “good" girls don't cuss in general, and I try not to because of how I was raised. Even spelling out a comment on something, I will put “omgosh!" instead of “omg".

Santab, that's so impressive that you had such reasoning skills at a young age! I guess some of us were gullible and more easily led!

seachain, yes, some religions believe “pleasures of the flesh" detract from higher spiritual attainment. But I see where that's got the Catholic priests.

Society as a whole has measured a woman's worth by her purity, and many religions do, too. My belief is it has everything to do with trying to control a woman's sexuality and nothing to do with attaining a higher spiritual state. We all know women have been called whores or sluts or promiscuous if someone thinks she has sex with too many partners. For years, young pregnant girls were often banished to “homes for unwed mothers" or their child raised as tho it was their sibling. Because, no sex for girls without marriage. A horrible crime. “We'll punish you for the rest of your life by taking your baby from you and put baby up for adoption". The whole family felt shame if this situation happened to one of their girls.

In the U.S. and many places, the wedding gown is traditionally white. A white bridal gown may not carry as much weight as it used to, but for years, it symbolized the bride was pure, a virgin. Even if she wasn't, of course. But it was very important that she be perceived as virginal. No such moral emphasis on pureness or virginity was placed on the groom.

I read an incredibly insightful autobiography called “Ruined" written by a woman who, along with her 4 college roommates, was held at gunpoint and raped. She did what she had to in order to survive. Her book details how, because of her religion and society, she was made to feel she was ruined, no longer “pure" because of the rape. Damaged goods. She dealt with this fall out for years. She's now an ordained minister with daughters of her own and has taught them they are valuable, they are worth more than their virginity and sexual history.

And there is the ungodly ritual of female genitalia mutilation performed in some cultures. Apparently its patriarchy finds it an abomination that women might desire sex or enjoy sex. The ultimate in control; a procedure that is horrifically injurous to both the soul and the body, leaving so many different kinds of scars.

DivineMrsM · February 2019

There are definitely things I miss about believing in Christianity. I liked the idea of prayer, especially in those hopeless situations where I felt I had nothing more to offer when things were out of my control. On the other hand, prayer was confusing. Sometimes situations worked out, sometimes not. It left me asking."What's the right formula to get it to work every time?"

Last night I had a lot on my mind about different areas in my life: the dramatic saga of a family member who miraculously turned his life around, concerns about my husband's employment, dealing with bc and more. I was having lots of deep feelings and it popped into my head about the teaching of “laying all our cares at the foot of the cross." “Cast your cares upon Jesus." I hadn't thought of that in years. It's definitely a freeing idea. I suppose some people simply cast their “cares to the wind". But it is nice to think someone else would carry your burdens. And I miss that belief. I feel too suffocated by the patriarchy of Christianity to go back.

So I grapple with issues and accept that maybe I will always be doing so. Perhaps that way I'll find some answers.

leftduetostupidmods · February 2019

Actually the bride's gown being white was a fashion started by Queen Victoria, and the significance of purity was added later, as white as significator of virginity can be found in a lot of ancient religions (i.e. the Vesta priestesses in ancient Rome). Interesting fact: in some cultures it's the symbol of death and mourning.

leftduetostupidmods · February 2019

Divine, here you have the major differences between matriarchal and patriarchal societies. The root of it is simply control. When someone can't control you directly, they'll start a campaign of controlling what people think about you.

DivineMrsM · February 2019

Oh, wow, seachain, your comment is very profound! “When someone can't control you directly, they'll start a campaign of controlling what people think about you.“ I never thought of it that way, but how true!

Yes, the white bridal gown has morphed into different meanings over the years. In the “olden days", many women simply got married in their Sunday best. There was not money for a special gown to be worn one time only.

I did know that white is a symbol of death and mourning and I often wear the color when going to a funeral home viewing. Sometimes the black is just too suffocating and depressing. My own take on it is the black represents the feelings of one who is living while the white represents the spiritual realm the departed has entered. They both have their place, and of course nowadays, people wear many differentcolors at a funeral.

DivineMrsM · March 2019

Some things made almost an unconscious impression on me growing up. I did not feel connection with the people who attended the same Catholic church as my family did. Now that may be because of my own parents’ dysfunction. My mother had a nervous breakdown in her early 40s. She was sent to the state mental hospital for about 3 months. Five of us seven children still lived at home, from ages 15 to age 6.

To help us all through it, the three youngest of us kids (I was one of them) each went and lived with a different neighbor friend of my parents. My two oldest sisters stayed at home with my dad. To this day, these two sisters are the most dependable and responsible people I’ve ever known. In hindsight, I’m pretty sure Dad kept them at home to keep his own sanity. Imagine being age 45, working full time and five kids at home while your wife is hospitalized for months. Also in hindsight, to my regret, I never, ever fully appreciated all my dad endured. He never, ever complained or expected sympathy. The man was an alcoholic, but somehow our family held together through many years. My parents divorced after about 35 years of married when their youngest graduated high school.

Anyway, my point here is that no one from our church, half a mile up the road, extended any help to us. No priest came and visited, no nun pulled us aside at school and let us know they were praying for us, ect. In fact, I remember we were supposed to keep this all hush hush. I’m pretty sure many people knew. This was the 60s, tho, when such matters were not discussed. It’s always stayed with me since that time how removed we were from the church. I couldn’t figure out what was the purpose of attending. They were preaching one thing, but their actions were non-existent. I know not all churches are like this, but my experience shaped my views.

DivineMrsM · August 2019

In the middle of March, shortly after my last post above, my world became a big jumble of change. I had progression for the first time since diagnosed with mbc in 2011 and began a new treatment. My husband was pressured into taking an early retirement at his place of employment, but was not ready for official retirement. He began what turned into a many months' long search for his next job. In other words, it all hit the fan at one time. A very unsettled summer.

So, my spiritual thoughts, questions and ruminations were put on the back burner while I had to adapt to new things in my life.

I'm adjusting to my new medicine, tho it's not as easy as the last one I was on. Dh starts his new job next week, and we both think it's a pretty good fit for him.

Last week, I came across an article that mentioned Julia Sweeney and her movie, Letting Go of God, which I'd never heard of before. I'm including the link. I've watched over an hour of it and think it's great. Want to think about what she's already said, and then will finish watching.

Posting the link in case anyone else would like to watch/listen to her thorough discussion of religion and God.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=C74-f4ZV-ss

Spirituality Outside Of Organized Religion

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