Your One Piece of Advice

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DiagnosisDisruption
DiagnosisDisruption Member Posts: 108
edited November 2018 in Just Diagnosed

If you had to give someone ONE piece of advice to get through this cancer disruption, what would it be?

Mine would be to keep moving. Walking, yoga, more walking, tiny pieces of exercise. Even when you don't feel like it. Especially when you don't feel like it. Through everything; the waiting, the chemo, the surgery, the radiation.

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  • CaliKelly
    CaliKelly Member Posts: 474
    edited November 2018

    OMG I agree with that 100, no 1000% Saved me ! I would have really gone nuts a few times , I fled to the safety and security of my gym! Saved my sanity and truly helps physically even if you don't feel like it . Perfect answerDouble D😉

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  • edwards750
    edwards750 Member Posts: 3,761
    edited November 2018

    Definitely sage advice. I didn’t go to the gym but I definitely kept moving. The exercise combined with the distraction helped me keep sane throughout the process.

    I’ll also add my support group at church was a lifesaver too. Who understands better than ladies going through the same process. I learned a lot from them and their support was invaluable.

    Of course this website was a godsend as well. None of us wants to pepper our doctors with questions non-stop even if you can get him or his nurse on the phone. To be able to come here and get some advice and reassurance was so helpful.

    Diane


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  • hapa
    hapa Member Posts: 920
    edited November 2018

    Not exercising was never going to happen for me, I'm too much of a fitness nut. The one thing I concentrated my efforts on which I think really helped was maintaining good nutrition. Your food choices have a big effect on your gut flora, which gets decimated by the chemo and antibiotics. Good nutrition is also necessary to rebuild and repair your body after the damage from chemo, surgery, and radiation. High protein, high fiber, high in vitamins and minerals is what I've been striving for.

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited November 2018

    Good nutrition, trust/faith in your medical team, a good support system, positive thoughts, lots of prayer, and know that it's ok to cry if you feel like it.

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  • star2017
    star2017 Member Posts: 827
    edited November 2018

    take it one step at a time

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  • ksusan
    ksusan Member Posts: 4,505
    edited November 2018

    Don't borrow trouble. Ruminating and catastrophizing don't help.

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  • trying2staypositive7
    trying2staypositive7 Member Posts: 96
    edited November 2018

    Hi all!!

    Mine would definitely be STAY POSITIVE!!! It's definitely hard to do but it beats the alternative. Sending everyone gentle hugs!

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  • AliceBastable
    AliceBastable Member Posts: 3,461
    edited November 2018

    Cheesecake. 😁 Not all the time, but after certain appointments.

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  • Egads007
    Egads007 Member Posts: 1,603
    edited November 2018

    LOL@ cheesecake! Too true!

    Have to agree with Ksusan, so important...the exercise advice, positive thinking...all great thoughts from all.

    My 2 cents would be to remain connected to who you are. Cancer makes enormous changes to character...some for the better (priorities are very clear now). With all the change that does happen, strive to hang onto your pre-diagnosis self...she was a pretty good gal after all....and worth working back to

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  • DiagnosisDisruption
    DiagnosisDisruption Member Posts: 108
    edited November 2018

    I love all these! The cheesecake could be ANY food! If you crave it, and it gets you through the day, then who is going to stand in your way?

    I love the one step at a time. It is so easy to want to be five steps ahead. A little knowledge about that fifth step is okay, but obsessing about it is detrimental.

    I actually got in trouble from the oncologist by going to the gym. She was more worried about gym germs than the 500 K-5 kids I have every day! I went anyway because it was either that for file for divorce. What's a threat of a cold when there is the prospect of splitting up the possessions?

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  • DiagnosisDisruption
    DiagnosisDisruption Member Posts: 108
    edited November 2018

    CaliKelly - Double D! Not accurate (well the radiated one might be well on it's way), but it's sticking!

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  • rachelcarter35
    rachelcarter35 Member Posts: 368
    edited November 2018

    Get a second opinion if you want one and fire any doctor that doesn't listen to you.

    Know sometimes you won't feel positive even if you want to.

    Drink lots of water.

    Walk.

    and everything above.

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  • LimnoGal
    LimnoGal Member Posts: 157
    edited November 2018

    Drink LOTS of water. Every day. Even when you don’t feel like it.

    Realize that some friends and acquaintances are going to be wierd around you. Treasure the ones that hang around after your diagnosis. Even if they say or do awkward things. They’re trying. The rest of them-whatever. It’s their problem to deal with.

    Be nice to yourself. This is a sh*##y road we travel, and we don’t need to make it worse.

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  • CaliKelly
    CaliKelly Member Posts: 474
    edited November 2018

    Lot of good stuff here! We should write a book!Funny, profound, practical, downright brilliant(cheesecake) I agree with it all, water is important, friends will act weird, exercise is crucial,a doctor you don't like has got to go, don't borrow trouble or assume the worst.2 things stand out to me as most important, Hold on to who you were and still are, minus a body part or two😄 And stay positive! Positive attitude has been scientifically proven to aid recovery!😃 And I'm sorry Double D, but diagnosis disruption ,phew, too hard to type!(and spell)Love you girls, you're making my day😚💜💜💜

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited November 2018

    Allow yourself the freedom to NOT be positive from time to time. I remember, after three months of tx and feeling awful and defeated (of course chemo had something to do with that mood), I stayed in bed for hours, didn't eat, and curled up in a ball, crying from time to time. By nightfall I was so sick of myself I got up, squared my shoulders, and never needed to do that again.

    It's exhausting dealing with that disease, yet still having to put on cheerful/positive/encouraging/courageous face for the public, including our family, friends, co-workers, and all the people we come in contact with, for days/weeks/months. Give yourself a break to just let go when you need to.

    Claire in AZ

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  • DiagnosisDisruption
    DiagnosisDisruption Member Posts: 108
    edited November 2018

    I forgot about the water! Yes, just when you feel extra crappy, go back in time to figure out when you last drank. Most times it was too long ago. Holds true six months out of chemo.

    I like the positive attitude - BUT allowing yourself to have a crappy attitude on occasion. I did get tired of feeling like a circus performer all the ever loving time.

    Another one to add would be setting up a CaringBridge account. This put all the info on one page and you wouldn't get phone calls just when you were falling asleep. Or feeling like you were going to toss your cookies. But mostly when you needed some shut eye. I set my journal account up and then made the rule: NO PHONE CALLS.

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  • wallycat
    wallycat Member Posts: 3,227
    edited November 2018

    I agree with "Don't borrow trouble" from Ksusan.

    And also, allow yourself to grieve and have the occasional pity-party. Cancer does not define us and our emotions also do not define us...good days, bad days and confusing days. Let yourself BE.

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  • CaliKelly
    CaliKelly Member Posts: 474
    edited November 2018

    Yes!I did conveniently block out of my memory the times I would only cry in the shower, because I didn't want to upset anyone. It got a little lonely to not be able to show my feelings of misery to anybody. Except my poor husband! I always wanted to show a fearless face, laughing and joking, for the most part it helped me. But like I said, made me feel a little lonely at times. Be positive overall but allow your feelings too!

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  • BellasMomToo
    BellasMomToo Member Posts: 305
    edited November 2018

    I agree with everyone, especially about drinking water. I would fill a Starbucks 'venti' size cup (26 oz?) with water and made sure I drank at least 4 of those a day.

    My recommendation is keep a log/journal of how you are doing each day. I would use my log to keep track of my water intake, exercise, body temp, weight, etc... as well as how I felt that day.

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  • dtad
    dtad Member Posts: 2,323
    edited November 2018

    Hi everyone...my one piece of advice would to be treated at a major university teaching hospital. At the very least get a second opinion at one. IMO where you are treated is paramount. Good luck to all.

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  • keepthefaith
    keepthefaith Member Posts: 2,156
    edited November 2018

    Be your own advocate...and BREATHE!!

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  • WC3
    WC3 Member Posts: 1,540
    edited November 2018

    Don't be afraid to ask questions or seek second opinions.

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  • Lucy55
    Lucy55 Member Posts: 3,044
    edited November 2018

    What helped me was walking , playing table tennis , and gardening ...

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  • Claire_in_Seattle
    Claire_in_Seattle Member Posts: 4,570
    edited November 2018

    Lucy.....second you on exercise. So important during and after chemo. I also took the view that I was cured until proven otherwise. Still operating that way. I drank water and carried a water bottle. On this one, my advice is to get a good one so you don't drown your mobile phone.

    I ate to nourish my body. You do need more protein than usual plus the usual on fruits and veggies. No worries about fresh as I had Neulasta. I would also suspect that a daily probiotic helped.

    And try to take the long view. I remember dragging one day during a walk and seeing someone with a walker. I felt foolish as I instantly recognized that I would most likely be just fine in a few months whereas this poor soul would never recover.

    A major lesson in gratitude. - Claire 

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  • Vslush
    Vslush Member Posts: 183
    edited November 2018

    Claire,

    Love the "I was cured until proven otherwise" attitude! I felt the same way, and I think it helped more than anything else. Having complete confidence in your care team makes such a difference. If you don't have that, assemble a new team.

    Also, don't be timid about what you need. Ask for help, as friends/family want to help but don't always know how. Be specific.

    Vickki

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  • NotVeryBrave
    NotVeryBrave Member Posts: 1,287
    edited November 2018

    So much good advice! I was really bad about the exercise and the water intake, but I survived. I'm still bad about those ...

    My best advice? Realize that for most of us - this is a temporary period of treatment. Think of how fast time goes by for other aspects of your life and focus on the finish line. You can do this!

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  • santabarbarian
    santabarbarian Member Posts: 3,085
    edited November 2018

    Inform yourself on integrative Medicine and things you can do in addition to oncology and surgery. I added several integrative practices to my medical regimen, which seem to have assisted me in tolerating chemo well, with relatively few side effects. Consult with a specialist in this area.

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