The Beast & Me: Round Two

Options
13567…17

Comments

  • lexi4
    lexi4 Member Posts: 1,074
    edited February 2007
    I am soo sorry that you have to deal with the beast again. Makes me sick! We will be here to back you up on this.

    HUgs and Prayers,
    Lexi
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • althea
    althea Member Posts: 1,595
    edited February 2007

    {{{{{{nosurrender}}}}}}} I believe with every ounce of my being that you will live up to your screenname. I am so sorry you are having another round of this. I'll be cheering for you when you kick that cancer butt clear into orbit.

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • pennylane
    pennylane Member Posts: 177
    edited February 2007

    Read the sad news yesterday and have been stunned and shaken on such a personal level...Your fight is our fight...so many of us are emotionally indebted to you. Okay, so now you have to gear up and do it again...anger is a very useful tool...when things suck grind it up with your heel and walk away back into your life...You can do this...I am so sorry and so pissed about this...Am with you dear friend...

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • ravdeb
    ravdeb Member Posts: 3,116
    edited February 2007
    nosurrender..
    I'm reading your recent post and well..of course you are overwhelmed. It is terribly overwhelming.

    And you are not vain. It isn't a matter of being vain...it is a matter of having a part of you physically removed. It is a PART of you and it has nothing to do with being vain.

    The only thing I can suggest is....to take a deep breath and then sort it all out into steps. When you write all of that all together..it truly is overwhelming. If you break it down into each of the steps you will be taking and only think about the first step...it may help.

    I know you can fight this! You are a fighter! You can do this!

    Get those fighter mitts on!
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • yowyow
    yowyow Member Posts: 69
    edited February 2007
    NS, I am cross, its not fair and you are deep in my thoughts!!!

    Forgive me if i have missed a post where it has been explained why you cant have immed' implants.

    Do you need rads?? If it is better for your mental wellbeing and medically possible why not??

    I understand you have just found a new surgeon, but if thats what you want-fight for it. Some surgeons just dont want to do it. Having a mast' is hard enough without not getting the recon' you want.

    Again I say please forgive me for ranting if there is a medical reason why you cannot have immediate implants. But we musn't be bullied if a surgeon justs wants to go with the norm (expanders)

    Sending you some love and beautiful sunshine across the ocean!!!(wish I could roll out that biggest ball of string, it would get there faster)
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • beth1225
    beth1225 Member Posts: 1,061
    edited February 2007
    G, I am surprised to hear you will be 8 hours on the table. I have gone to 3 ps for consults (one was a waste of time) but they all gave me a window of 6 hours with immediate implants or expanders depending on further discussions with the bs. There is a lump they are "watching" and I am having a problem with the "watching". My problem with anesthesia has always been severe nausea after so they are going to give my IV Pepcid in pre-op.

    Had the ooph five years ago. That was done laporoscopy (sp?) and was a walk in the park. I was in pre-op and recovery longer than the surgery itslef. I came out with 3 little bandaids. Recuperating was a breeze compared to other surgeries I have had. I have to assume the ovaries are coming out to keep your natural estrogen from being produced since you said these new ones are er+.

    I am sorry you have to go through this. I am still vascillating between recon or not. Vanity is not the main problem. IMHO, I think society has drilled it into our heads that we are defined by our boobs. One of the thigs that really got to me at my firs visit with the onc was that when I cried about the PBM, she simply stated that I must be attached to my breasts. Well, DUH! I guess so.

    It is hard to decide on a mastectomy no matter what stage you are in, pre-cancer or one found. i am not as overwhelmed with it as I was before. Kind of calm now. I do still talk about it because, quite frankly, it is very major surgery and there are risks no matter what. But the one ps said that if the path report comes back with bc, I have already done the best thing, had the mast.
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited February 2007

    Post deleted by Chemosabi1

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited February 2007
    NS, I just want to say that you have such a good attitude about this whole shitty thing. I've had one mast and I keep saying that I'm really thinking about getting the other one lopped off.

    As women I think most of us will agree that breasts are important to us. I never dreamed I'd be walking around lopsided (in the house). I don't think it has anything to do with vanity. It's part of who we are. Some women deal with never wearing bra after mast and are just fine with that. We are all different.

    I didn't go without my wig either when I was out of the house.
    Shirley
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • beth1225
    beth1225 Member Posts: 1,061
    edited February 2007
    I understand I may have written some inaccuracies in my post. I was just stating what the plastic surgeons told ME about how long the surgery would be. I did not talk about a TRAM, just expanders and so were the surgeons.

    I am not comparing a mastectomy when you have cancer to the one I am having as a preventive measure as a being bc free. It is like comparing an amputation to a pedicure. I understand that. Believe me, I don't want to upset the apple cart. I think I am a compassionate person and have been all my life.

    No matter what surgery one is having, it is a decision that has to be made by that individual. I know there are women here who have opted for no surgeries at all even in the face of bc. Is that correct or the norm? For them I suppose it is.

    Please don't tell me how easy my decision has been either because it hasn't. NS, from your PM you sent me yesterday I know you realize it and I thank you for your compassion and support you have extended to me.
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Maria_C_
    Maria_C_ Member Posts: 69
    edited February 2007
    .
    Damn ...
    NS , I'm just so out of words,
    so sorry you have to go through this again...
    One thing is very sure, you will do it again!!!!!!

    Sending good vibs your way.
    ((((((((...HUGS...))))))))
    .
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • AlaskaDeb
    AlaskaDeb Member Posts: 2,601
    edited February 2007
    Sending you hugs. I hope today goes well and your plans start to come together.

    Deb C.
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • trixiegram
    trixiegram Member Posts: 126
    edited February 2007
    Gina,

    I don't think you are vain - but I do think you are amazing. I am so sorry you are having to fight the beast, yet again. One could say it "sucks" but that or any other words would always fall short in describing the unfairness and horror involved in this kind of medical nightmare. Best I can do is lend my emtional support and tell you how loved and respected you are on these boards.

    For you dear - image

    Hugs,
    Niki
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited February 2007
    NS: Just sending you a hug and hoping your do ok. Anxiously waiting to hear from you. My goodness - you have so many friends here.

    Love Ya

    Nicki
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • cheryl58
    cheryl58 Member Posts: 182
    edited February 2007
    Dear NS,
    Just letting you know that I am thinking of you today. I just don't have the words to express how bad I feel for you. You have been my inspiration through my journey, and I know that your strength will only continue to shine through.

    Love,
    Cheryl
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • nosurrender
    nosurrender Member Posts: 2,019
    edited February 2007
    I must say that I think all the worrying about who was going to do the biopsy and then fighting the insurance companies...then being really nervous about the three cores through the nipple...then sweating it out all weekend... then finally hearing on Wed. that it is back- today I hit the wall! I have never been so tired in my life!

    Of course I had to go to battle again with the insurance companies. The docs want to restage me- I have a lung nodule that lit up on my last PET and they need to know if this is a new primary or mets. BUT my insurance company informed all of us that they don't think that is "medically necessary" at this time!

    I set up two appointments with two plastic surgeons. Need one more but couldn't get through.

    The breast surgeon last night was telling me that since one of my core samples showed "lymphovascular invasion" he wants to be extra vigilant with the nodes. But he also wants to see if he can spare me another Full Axillary Dissection. He was explaining this new SNB they are doing now and perhaps that is why I would be so long on the table.
    I also have blood clots problems from the chemo so they have to be extra careful with the surgery as a whole.
    This weekend I am going to do all the chores that need doing around my house because after the surgery I don't think I will be using my arms too much!
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited February 2007
    NS: We can all give you advice from hands on experience, but each case is different. Whatever the length of time, you will get through this surgery. Not to change the topic, but I was very upset that my port had to come out under anesthesia, when I read so many had theirs removed under local. Once I found out the reason, I was relieved and put all my trust in my surgeon.

    Now that I think about it, the surgeon had my family prepared for a much longer time in surgery. So each case is so different.

    Good luck with your visit to the PS! One step at a time.

    Im hoping those endorphins kicked in and you were able to get some sleep. This has been one heck of a week for you.

    Nicki
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • PoohRN1962
    PoohRN1962 Member Posts: 241
    edited February 2007
    NS, I am so sorry to read this thread. Your posts and strength have been an inspiration to me since I started this journey. If anyone can kick it's a$$, YOU can.

    Sending love,
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Naniam
    Naniam Member Posts: 1,766
    edited February 2007
    NS, we can only go on the adrenalin rush for so long and then we crash. Dealing with your insurance company is enough to make anyone nuts!!!

    Each of us is different - when I had the SNB I only had one node that actually took the dye or radioactive material - so he ended up just taking a "clump of tissue" to get more to sample. Lymph nodes aren't visible to the surgeons eye. I think you have found a good BS and am thankful you will be in good, competent hands.

    I know you have back, anesthesia and bleeding issues so you want to limit your time on the table. Our heart and prayers are with you as you move forward in the next few weeks.

    Hugs and blessings, Brenda
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Toronto
    Toronto Member Posts: 118
    edited February 2007
    What an individual battle this is for all! No one's round or second round can be quite the same.

    I too am on a second round, and it is a different experience. But in a way it is easier (for me - your mileage may vary). Like you not a recurrance but an independent event. YAH it should be better, but being struck by lightning twice is still the pits.
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited February 2007
    NS,
    Im so sorry to hear about this...I have been lurking, reading your post here...you have been such an inspiration to so many, now its time for all of us to be that for you....
    You are a very strong woman and will beat this again!!!!!!!!!
    Jule
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Maria_C_
    Maria_C_ Member Posts: 69
    edited February 2007
    NS,

    "He was explaining this new SNB they are doing now and perhaps
    that is why I would be so long on the table."
    It can be adding to the rest,
    coz they can test it also during/by then and again.
    Takes a bit for them to take samples and analyze them
    while doing surgery.

    I had that done during surgery (Mastec.)
    also because "lymphovascular invasion" had shown on the previous SNB.
    It's good that they do that, it's confirming things again, and again,
    if indeed Full Axillary Dissection is needed.

    In here at the Hosp. I am at, the results of a SNB
    is presented to the patient right after she did the test,
    meanly normally we do not wait days to know the results of this Dx.
    The first SNB I did,
    the results of the analyze, came around half an hour later.
    Half an hour more for them to study the "things"
    and then I was in to hear the "news".
    This for you to have an idea
    of how long it can take to analyze this, if everything goes well,
    if the samples are ok, and so on, and so on.
    As to the other during surgery ... I do not remember, I was asleep.

    I'm sure you will feel better after, knowing that they check it
    until that point.

    Go easy on yourself and on the chores around your house.
    Hope you have the chance to cool down somehow over the weekend. image

    Hugs.
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • ravdeb
    ravdeb Member Posts: 3,116
    edited February 2007
    I agree..I did snb and was told when I got out of surgery what the results were. It takes a while..I was told this too..because they test it. If they find something positive they take more nodes out.

    Wishing you well, ns..knowing it's hard...not much I can say...am holding your hand virtually...
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • PuppyFive
    PuppyFive Member Posts: 2,808
    edited February 2007

    NS, I have no words that can tell you how much this breaks my heart! You have always been so strong, and I know you will always be! I have not been on the site for a while, But Please know my Prayers have always been with You. I don't know what to say! All my Love {{{{NS}}}} Puppy

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • suave
    suave Member Posts: 189
    edited February 2007
    NS,
    I am glad that eventhough you might be sad, you are so strong. I don't know what to say, but I will pray for you. I wish you didn't have to deal with it again. A mastectomy sounds good for peace of mind. Thanks for updating us. I hope your surgery goes well, and most importantly I hope your nodes are clear.
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • csp
    csp Member Posts: 2,765
    edited February 2007
    Quote:

    The breast surgeon last night was telling me that since one of my core samples showed "lymphovascular invasion" he wants to be extra vigilant with the nodes. But he also wants to see if he can spare me another Full Axillary Dissection. He was explaining this new SNB they are doing now and perhaps that is why I would be so long on the table.



    G,
    I am so glad that you have a BS that wants to spare
    you the full axillary if it he can, you have already had trouble with LE in the past. I don't blame you a bit for wanting to find out if you can do this in 2 stages with you being so sensitve to the drugs and your other medical history and experiences . Don't forget to have them put in big red letters on your charts ALLERGIC TO STERI STRIPS TOO !

    "We are all snow flakes."

    hugs,
    Carrie
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Mena
    Mena Member Posts: 426
    edited February 2007
    OH Geez, NS...To have to fight with insurance companies at a time like this...

    Isn't a chest ray standard in preadmission testing before surgery? At least that might give a better look at that nodule... At the very least, a CT-scan...

    Remember a nodule can be indicative of an old infection, Sarcoidosis, among other things, and is not necessarily mets, G...

    I really wish I could help. Oh, you already know this, but PETs have a high rate of false positives...Try to get some much needed rest, G...wrap yourself in that scrumptuous afghan and bask in all the healing thoughts and prayers coming your way...love, Mena...xo
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Beesie
    Beesie Member Posts: 12,240
    edited February 2007
    NS,
    I'm so sorry that you have to go through this again. This really stinks.

    I understand your reaction to the mastectomy. After all the biopsies and false alarms I'd had over the years, I was mentally prepared for the breast cancer diagnosis. But needing a mastectomy? That knocked the wind out of me. Dealing with a mastectomy and reconstruction added a whole other dimension to the BC battle, something I'd never considered and certainly not something that I wanted any part of. And it had nothing to do with vanity.

    I know that you don't need to hear this from anyone, but just keep fighting. You beat this @&**#! beast before and you'll knock him out for good this time!
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited February 2007
    NS: Before my surgery I had a CT of the abdomen, a pelic and abdominal US and a bone scan, and a lung scan. My surgeon wanted me to have baselines. Luckily they came back normal other than having arthritis.

    I dont see how your insurance can deny these tests. Treatment is gonna be based on the whole picture and the results of these tests are so important.

    Nicki
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • PJB
    PJB Member Posts: 2,615
    edited February 2007
    NS, I just saw your post and am SO sorry you have to go through all this again. You sound primed and ready for battle. The surgery sounds like a long one, but you'll come through with flying colors. Hugs and prayers,
    Paula
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • rmmom
    rmmom Member Posts: 168
    edited February 2007
    I am so sorry Gina
    My prayers are with you
    Bev
    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter

Categories