30years old, my life has changed forever

Red2108- take some deep breaths, your life is not over. I'm guessing you had a biopsy that gave positive results? This is the first step in getting to what procedures you need to remove cancer from your body. You may not need chemo, not everyone does. You'll meet with a breast surgeon/BS, and a medical oncologist/MO. A plan will get in place, you will move forward.

There are young women on this site, that once you know your diagnosis will be able to relate to you probably better (I'm 59) and can speak about what they've been through. I know its harder the younger you are. Best wishes to you.

I'm sending you big, big hugs. I know it's overwhelming right now. As much as you can, be kind to yourself while you take it all in. It's okay to cry, and no, you don't deserve this. There are many young women here who are doing well during and after treatment. You can do this, and we are all here for you.

Also, try to remember that everyone has a unique experience with this disease and with treatment. Be informed, but don't be too fearful of other's experiences. I found most the things I was afraid of never happened, and the things that did happen weren't even on my radar. Take a deep breath, and take it one step at a time. Best wishes to you as you go through the next steps. 💗

Ladies I am so sorry for all of us. Breast cancer sucks! I'm very new to this as well. I'm 32 and found out I have breast cancer IDC stage 1 grade 1 about a month ago. It was an accidental find as I didn't feel any bumps and neither mammogram nor ultrasound showed it. I just went for an MRI due to my family history and sure enough It was there. It sure was a shock to me and it took some time to register but once it hit me I just couldn't talk to anyone and asked everyone to give me some space. I basically stayed in bed for days and cried. Like many of you I am also very independent and always taking care of others so to think that I have to rely on others was just shocking. And most of all I kept thinking I've been the one to take care of everyone, is there anyone that would even be able to take care of me?

It took me some time but I realized I can't just be laying in bed feeling sorry for myself. I spoke with my genetic counselor who referred me to the clinic social worker. She was amazing and told me about so many amazing resources available for breast cancer patients. After talking to her I felt so much better. I started including my friends and family in some of the decision making (figured if they're going to take care of me, they might as well know what's coming). I know this may sounds unusual but I feel so much better now that I have people to talk to. Many of them don't get me and say things that makes me feel worse but I know they don't know how to respond to this. No one does. I've learned not to be angry with them since they're trying their best. Knowing that they're there for me makes me feel at ease. This might be the hardest time mentally but much harder times are waiting for me physically and I know I'm going to need every help I can get. I've even decided to move in with my parents.

I'm sorry if I'm rumbling. All I want to say is anger didn't help me. Isolating everyone didn't help me. Being open with my friends and family did. I realized that I was angry at everyone's responses but instead of telling them that, I'd isolate them but that wasn't fair. They don't know what they're doing wrong and with some direction they get better.

Stay strong ladies and keep on fighting

Hi Red2108,

I have had an interesting journey, but I am willing to share as much as possible. Feel free to message me, we can msg, email, or even chat on telephone if you needed.

I was diagnosed 3 weeks prior to my 32nd Birthday.

Stage 1 (1.7cm) Grade 3. Er/Pr/Her2+ Node NEG

I chose a double mastectomy because I did not want any radiation, I refused it and a consultation with a RADS oncologist. I am a Nurse, I know the good, bad, and ugly.. I did not want it near my heart, my cancer was on L side, and I wanted my cosmetic reconstruction to look a specific way. I am a belly dancer too, it is part of my life and I perform professionally. I chose esthetics because I decided quality of life over quantity, I was fully supported.I had a nipple sparing procedure, so I have my nipples. Scarring is minimal. I love them now more than ever.

I did not do tamox because I MUST take an SSRI. I am unable to transition to effexor only, which I use for hot flashes..yay menopause. I also do not take AI anti hormonals because of joint pain and I developed trigger finger..Again, I chose quality of life. I also quit chemo too, due to quality of life.

My advice is to follow your gut, it will not steer you incorrectly. I did not follow mine initially, I should have. I live and learn, and can advise others. I wish I had not done hard core chemo because it had long lasting effects that continue to affect me 4 years later. The biologic therapies were much easier, I should have refused all but biologics. Ultimately , the % it "helped" me was totally not worth . It IS worth it to many women though, just not me.

My hair grew back, my darn eyebrows never did. LOL.

I am happy, healthy, and so far cancer free...