Just Diagnosed

Aisha,

You are in the hardest part right now. You've just been diagnosed, you don't have a treatment plan yet, and you are freaking out because you want to be there for your kids.

This is truly, truly the worst part of Cancerland. You've gone from being a fairly healthy woman, whose breast cancer could be cured, to someone with "terminal" cancer.

However, bones mets can be managed for years. You will get a treatment plan in place, and since you are considered "de novo", you haven't been exposed to any of the therapies yet, so it is very likely that you will get good results. Those of us with many lines of treatment under our belts don't get quite as much progression-free time as the "de novo" gang. There are two ladies here, JenninMichigan and ShazzaKelly who have gotten YEARS out of their first line of treatment. It could make a girl jealous

It will be hard in these first weeks to keep going. Ask your doctor for anxiety reducing medication if that would help. It did for me. Find support, so that you can talk and cry. There will be talking and crying.

Who do you have at home that can help with childcare while you are in treatment? While treatment for Stage 4 isn't as harsh as early stage treatment (they aren't going for a cure, they are treating to manage the disease), you will need support at some points. It might be as simple as someone looking after your kids while you see the doctor, or you might need household help, depending on what treatment you pursue.

Stage 4 breast cancer treatment is a marathon, not a sprint. I hope you get a treatment plan in place soon, and that you find comfort and peace. Hug those kids - they are stronger than you know.

Aisha, welcome to the club no one wants to join. You have some excellent advice above. The time right after diagnosis is the hardest and we've all been there. All of us.

You have every right to cry, be angry, scream, yell, cry some more. Do not feel that you have to be absolutely strong.

It will get better, I promise. Sure your future isn't going to be the same as it was, but once you start taking the first set of meds and the cancer retreats, you'll get to a semblance of normal.

In the meantime, if you have trouble sleeping, ask for sleeping pills. Depressed? Ask for anti-depressants. Whatever you need to get over the hump. It won't be forever. I took sleeping pills for 4 months after diagnosis.

If you need to think about this a little differently, go to the main breastcancer.org site and look at all the possible treatments for this disease. Get bestbird's handbook. If each of those treatments lasts for a year, you'll be around for a very long time. When I was first diagnosed with mets my onc told me not to give way my stuff but to think long term. My first treatment lasted three years. The second one for a year. Now I'm on my third and it's working. But there are ladies here who have been on their first treatment for 7+ years.

Many hugs. I reiterate -- you WILL feel better. It'll simply take some time.

Aisha, letrozole is a generic drug and usually the first line treatment in the United States. It's very inexpensive. You should be able to get it in India.