Just Diagnosed

Aisha15

Last week i was diagnosed with 2/3 stage Breast cancer with lymph nodes involved.. My oncologist advised me to do PET Scan. The results showed that the cancer has spread to my bones. I feel devastated right now. Although i'm very strong but seeing my kids cry in front of me breaks my heart and weakens me from inside. I've no idea how am i going to live with this. Its killing me from inside. I hope some positive words from you lot would be a bit helpful.

blainejennifer

Aisha,

You are in the hardest part right now. You've just been diagnosed, you don't have a treatment plan yet, and you are freaking out because you want to be there for your kids.

This is truly, truly the worst part of Cancerland. You've gone from being a fairly healthy woman, whose breast cancer could be cured, to someone with "terminal" cancer.

However, bones mets can be managed for years. You will get a treatment plan in place, and since you are considered "de novo", you haven't been exposed to any of the therapies yet, so it is very likely that you will get good results. Those of us with many lines of treatment under our belts don't get quite as much progression-free time as the "de novo" gang. There are two ladies here, JenninMichigan and ShazzaKelly who have gotten YEARS out of their first line of treatment. It could make a girl jealous

It will be hard in these first weeks to keep going. Ask your doctor for anxiety reducing medication if that would help. It did for me. Find support, so that you can talk and cry. There will be talking and crying.

Who do you have at home that can help with childcare while you are in treatment? While treatment for Stage 4 isn't as harsh as early stage treatment (they aren't going for a cure, they are treating to manage the disease), you will need support at some points. It might be as simple as someone looking after your kids while you see the doctor, or you might need household help, depending on what treatment you pursue.

Stage 4 breast cancer treatment is a marathon, not a sprint. I hope you get a treatment plan in place soon, and that you find comfort and peace. Hug those kids - they are stronger than you know.

Grannax2

One year ago, I was where you are. I wouldn't want to go back there. I was devastated, just like you. That said, I am now able to think without panic, most of the time.

I remember being completely shocked when I was told by MDA oncologist that I would only need to take two pills. Complete disbelief. I was wrong, and those pills have worked. I don't know what treatment will be suggested for you. It will depend on hormone receptor tests that will be done on a piece of your tumor. For me, because my tumor is ERPR+/HER-, my TX is Ibrance and Femara.

I have mets to lung, chest and liver. Treatments are better now than they used to be. New treatments are being approved all the time. Ibrance is called targeted therapy. I knew nothing about that type of therapy when I was diagnosed.

There are really no words to help you right now. You have to plod through it. I am glad you've found this forum. Once you find out the type of treatment you will have, you can go to specific threads and read about other ladies experience. That was very helpful for me. I hope it will help you, too.

pajim

Aisha, welcome to the club no one wants to join. You have some excellent advice above. The time right after diagnosis is the hardest and we've all been there. All of us.

You have every right to cry, be angry, scream, yell, cry some more. Do not feel that you have to be absolutely strong.

It will get better, I promise. Sure your future isn't going to be the same as it was, but once you start taking the first set of meds and the cancer retreats, you'll get to a semblance of normal.

In the meantime, if you have trouble sleeping, ask for sleeping pills. Depressed? Ask for anti-depressants. Whatever you need to get over the hump. It won't be forever. I took sleeping pills for 4 months after diagnosis.

If you need to think about this a little differently, go to the main breastcancer.org site and look at all the possible treatments for this disease. Get bestbird's handbook. If each of those treatments lasts for a year, you'll be around for a very long time. When I was first diagnosed with mets my onc told me not to give way my stuff but to think long term. My first treatment lasted three years. The second one for a year. Now I'm on my third and it's working. But there are ladies here who have been on their first treatment for 7+ years.

Many hugs. I reiterate -- you WILL feel better. It'll simply take some time.

Aisha15

Thank you for your kind words. I'm ERPR+, HER-. I'm going to see my oncologist tomorrow, lets see what treatment does he suggest. The thing is i'm from India and without a medical insurance. Hormonal Therapy tablets here are quite expensive and i wouldn't be able to afford them. Anyways Its great to see you guys hangin in there.

pajim

Aisha, letrozole is a generic drug and usually the first line treatment in the United States. It's very inexpensive. You should be able to get it in India.

Grannax2

Aisha. The targeted therapy that works with hormonal is very expensive. In the USA I get it for free. If it's approved in India, you may be able to get it for $10 a month through Pfizer. Your onc should know all about that. But, letrozole. works week on its own, too. Let us know what your once says.