stage 4 cancer and going to lose my insurance
Comments
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Also keep in mind, what he owns are community asset, it means you own half of the house, bank accounts and any other assets. You need to find yourself an attorney so you can find out how much does he own. Chances are he moved all the money out already. Do you have share credit cards with him? If you do, charge it up, so he needs to pay for the credit card balance.
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actually, he hasn't moved anything out yet...I'm thinking of doing that myself lol
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Jo, don’t move out once you do you will need money. Where are you going to get money to move out
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I meant move money out of the account
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Jojo~take a deep breath. HEs a jerk. I'm sorry but you haven't worked in 15 years, which means you're not only eligible for spousal alimony, if there are children involved, child support as well. You have been married for a very long time and he cannot just tell you what he is going to do. You are entitled to him maintaining your standard of living, because you have no recorded earnings of workings. I believe if you are stage four will qualify for you many things you aren't aware of. I don't what state you live in, but the little scab girlfriend, isn't walking away with anything you're entitled to. You are entitled to AT LEAST 50/50, and trust me you will get more than that. Once he really gets into this, his head will spin like the exorcist!! My divorce lasted 18 mons. It gets expensive, contact local social security offices and your county relations programs to see if you qualify for the Medicaid insurance. Even legal aid!! You're disabled, you cannot work. I would start the application with SS as well. Supplemental income you may qualify for. Whatever you do, don't wait. And. Ever ever tip your hand to anything you're doing. You don't need him. In the end he will end up with nothing but a heartless person and nothing. No judge is going to rule against you. So he's in for quite an embarrassing battle. Big hugs for you ! In the end he may be the one who ends up paying for the entire lawyers costs. I have seen that happen quite a bit. One day at a time beautiful
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Micmel,
Thank you for your kind words. Everything is so complicated. We have been living apart for several years. He seemed ok with continuing to keep things as they are and then suddenly he has to get divorced right now! I think his little gf is behind all of this
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Yes, divorce is complicated and having stage IV bc makes it even more so. I am not an attorney, but want to repeat that divorce law varies by state. In California, a true no fault state, all assets are split 50/50. No one gets more, regardless of who was at fault or who cheated on who. One person is not required to maintain the other persons lifestyle (as another poster stated). As a matter of fact, it matters not one little bit if your spouse was the sleaziest, meanest, self centered creep in the world and had numerous affairs. But, this is California. Which is why an attorney in your state is the only one who can tell you what you might or might not be entitled to. The fact that you have been living separately for several years may also affect your situation.
Wishing you the best.
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I'm certainly no expert but definately get an attorney as quick as possible to protect YOU and your child. I would not tell him that I was seeing a lawyer until I had seen one to know where I stand legally (there are somewhat different laws in different states).
Again I don't know but an attorney probably would and could protect the communal assets from being taken/hidden by him. To me, it sounds like he doesn't want to go to court (as you said) and 'offering' you 2 yrs of alimony is because if a Court is involved he knows he will be ordered to make a more equitable settlement of maritial property (house, checking/savings accounts, stocks/bonds, IRAs, etc.) for you. Good chance he's already seen a lawyer and it was 'suggested' to 'offer' you a next to nothing 'settlement' (and get you to accept it) because they know a Court will not be that easy on him.
Protect yourself - you can bet he is covering his 'shiney hiney'! For help with finding an attorney you might try contacting your State's Bar Association, local Legal Aide Society ( or whatever it's called there) or if there is a University close that has a Law School, for help.
Bottom line (as I see it) - to Hades with what he doesn't want to do - be proactive/your own best advocate, and seek legal help in establishing/getting YOUR rights and what is due you BY LAW! Then let them handle it/him, not you. Seek legal protection for you AND your child.
You CAN do it!
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Call your local Bar Association for a referral for a divorce attorney.
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