Too much advice!

pianolady, my well intentioned sister in law sent me a link to a seven hour (!) video series by some professed anticancer guru who was not a doctor and said sin caused cancer and more bs. I politely wrote and told her thanks,but no,thanks, what my own approach to mbc was, briefly explaining my treatment, how I believe in traditional treatment and complimentary as well, named a few inspirational books I read on the matter (all by doctors) and that while I dont believe stress causes bc, I had done a great deal of cutting it from my life. She was receptive. It just floors me that she never once ASKED me what my approach to dealing with mbc is. She just ASSUMED she knew a better way and thought she had some great insight I didn't have. Phttttt!!!!!

Other SIL mentioned a quack in Italy found a cure for cancer with baking soda and cottage cheese. Oh boy.

I learned to take it in stride. Have a few comments prepared for unwanted advice, like, oh, I'll add that advice to the rest I've received, or, I only take advice on Tuesday.

Dear Divone MrsM,

Seven hours! I can barely stay awake that long! after I posted this, I looked at the mail and a former co-worker had sent me some clippings from national enquirer about some miracle cure. A real authoritative source lol.

Oh please....

Dear all,

As much as I respect nature myself, I am a rational gal, preffering modern meds above all..

just recently, my dear well-intensioned cousin brought a bottle of scorpio related stuff from her trip to Cuba ( in fact produced by a med company there) which MO strictly said no to.. was a relief for me..

another good friend offered energy therapy.. using hands & mind to free me from the cancer.. definite and blunt noed that! I am confident I am positive in life, the way I already am

I have also been offered detoxing diets, raw unedible (in my opinion) plants.. since dx.. kindly passed those too.

I am lucky that I am surrounded by educated and sensible people, knowing my style and keeping their distance to my treatment. DH is a rockstar partner in this game, of course, keeping my privacy at the needed level to anyone.. well, 5 years is a long time, we set the game rules by now

I know everyone have good intensions, so really cannot get mad at any one of them really.

Hugs

Ebr

Every time I read posts like these I'm glad I told only a few close friends and family members of my Stage IV diagnosis. Over the five years since then, not one of them has ever had the temerity to suggest any course of action to me other than the one I am pursuing with my oncologist!

Tina

Such well-intentioned folks may drive us mad but certainly bring a chuckle when reading everyone's stories.

Divine, the notion that cancer is caused by sin and that someone gave you an article from the National Enquirer are quite hilarious .

A very close, usually very rationale, relative sent me an article about the whole Suzanne Sommers supplements in lieu of treatments practice, all the while urging me to forego all chemo and traditional medical treatments. My yoga teacher said "Don't eat sugar". Mind you, I endeavor to live a very healthy, well-rounded lifestyle in all facets, and am open to complementary and even some alternative treatments, but sadly, in nearly all cases, this breast cancer is beyond our control. Although I don't have any hardfast diet restrictions now, I was raised as a strict vegan and macrobiotic from birth and my parents introduced me to yoga and meditation (before all this stuff was trendy and mainstream) as a very young girl and look where that got me!

Uhhh, yah. Don't you love how people who don't have cancer have all the answers for you, LOL. I know they have the best of intentions, but still.. .

I was told to eat asparagus... and blueberries... and apple cider vinegar. A very good friend sent me a slew of immune system supplements.

And don't eat sugar, and don't use deodorant, and don't use various skin products...

I was told that there was a guy who had the cure to cancer but the government made him go into hiding in New Mexico so that the medical community could still get all our $$$.

My SIL was telling me about big Pharma. How they are all in cahoots not to find a cure. Maybe they sent the dude to hide in New Mexico. Maybe the gov't is using them to kill of people ( Soylent Green, anyone?) I wanted to say, hey, I cannot take on big Pharma as I am dealing with mbc, why don't you go up against them for me? I mean, how does talking about big Pharma help me in anymway? And I been hearing it since my best friend in the 1970s told me big Pharma was the reason no cure was found yet for diabetes because they'd lose money.

Isn't it always those who have never had cancer the ones who dispense all the advice and so called cures? It actually comes across as snobbery at times, like, "Well, i don't have it, so I must be doing something right that you are not," whether that means something physical, mental or emotional or a combo.

I, too, tell people I trust my medical doctor. Oncologists see it all. Sure, they can get things wrong at times. But more women are living longer today with mbc because of traditional medicine, not Reiki or cannibais, right? And ask any oncologist, they will have stories of patients who went the alternative route when they had a very real chance of keeping the cancer contained or kept in remission with traditional medicine, but by the time they realize the alternative isn't working, it is often too late. I twernt gonna go down that road.