Life does not end with a stage IV diagnosis (really!)

Caryn, what a spectacular picture of Frankie & Miles! Wow, life really does go on, doesn't it? Hard to believe your grandkids are growing up so fast. I can definitely see that Frankie resembles you. Beautiful kids.

I've been mulching my flower beds in the backyard this week, it is hard on my body but looks so nice all year when complete. We are celebrating the demolition of a duplex across the alley from us. It was owned by a slumlord (hope theres a special place in hell for their kind), disgustingly rundown but still rented out. A huge blight in the neighborhood and we finally got the place condemned, a wonderful thing. My backyard feels so incredibly different with that place and its inhabitants gone, and I can't help but thinking I am so glad to be here to experience this. In good weather, we love sitting on the back porch or around the firepit and its gonna be soooo much nicer now.

Caryn, Your beautiful grandchildren are getting so big. Miles is almost a year old? Wow, it is a wonderful reminder of that fact that I am living longer than I expected with this disease. I think that both of your grandchildren look like you. Has anyone ever told you that?

Devine, I am jealous. My garden is still covered with snow. I thought it would be gone by now, but we were surprised with a late 11 inch snowstorm late last week. Luckily, it is melting, so I am looking forward to playing in the dirt soon.

Believe, congratulations on your good scan results.

Stefanie, It sounds like you are having a good time traveling and visiting with friends. I hope your foot heals quickly and that you aren't in too much pain.

My DH and I spent a little more than two weeks in Florida last month. We spent 9 days in Walt Disney World and the rest of the time in Naples. We had no children with us, but we found that we could enjoy WDW all by ourselves. It was really fun. We went to a few beaches in the Naples area. We soaked in the warm temperatures and sunshine. One of my sons and his family were in Naples, too, and we joined them for a Red Sox pre-season game in Ft. Myers. They also joined us for a day at the beach. Our visit to Florida was extended when a snowstorm hit the northeast, and our flight home was canceled. We were not sad to spend an extra three days in the warm weather while people at home were digging out from under a foot and a half of new snow.

Lynne

Lynne, I LOVE Disneyland, kids or not. I lived by the one in Anaheim when I was small and the wonder of it all made a very lasting nostalgic experience. it's about time to go again. Would love to see Disney World!

Divine, I am very envious of your garden. I love to get out there and plant and nurture the garden. I was very disappointed to discover that our new HOA has some pretty rigid restrictions!! I am trying to think creatively and scout out the neighbors yards to see what I can get away with......heehee Congrats on your newfound privacy. That will be heavenly for you!

Steph, So sorry about the ankle. I remember last summer when I fractured my wrist and was in a splint for months! It really inhibits the activities. Have a blast anyway with your girlfriends!

exbmxgirl-your grandchildren are beautiful!!!!! Thank you for sharing!

Beliebe-so happy about your results. Celebrate!!!!

Babs

meme~ I understand the un calm feeling of this diagnosis and there is no rule to go through it. I am 46 going on 47 in may and I still sit and feel like I'm living someone elses life all of a sudden,and I wasn't given any choice like all of you. I try to live each day and remember, that at least they are treating me and saying things like chronic and lines of different treatments are available. I know that all of this sucks outloud, there are so many fighters here and great women with someday's just one word can lift your spirits. I know newtown well. My family lived there for over ten years. Near Tyler state park I believe it is. Lovely area. I am still not far from there. So know not far from you right now, Someone else does understand how you're feeling. You're not alone. Let's get the most out of each day ladies. It's our only choice now!!! Hugs all around. ~M~

Artist - Congrats !!!!-I'm joining the club with you on having a newly engaged daughter- we got the news last month and are very happy ! I have been having the same thoughts and fears that I won't be around for it. The wedding will be in L.A. (we live in Minnesota ) so it will be difficult to even be much help in planning. The groom to be is Jewish so my daughter is converting (not sure how long that takes but the wedding date will probably be no earlier than next summer). In addition, my daughter just started an awesome new job (she is an Entertainment Law attorney) so is overwhelmed with the process of wedding planning. Decision #1-get a Wedding Planner !!! Please, please I want to be around for the big day !

Artiste & Stilts- Congratulations to you both!! What happy news! My kids are too young still, but hopefully one day.....

In the meantime, in the spirit of this topic, I have been following up on one of the more unusual goals I've had since my diagnosis.

I work in a STEM field, and women are rare as hen's teeth (as they say), and the environment is decidedly not supportive- so, I decided to challenge it all- went and got a top-notch lawyer to file a legal complaint and force my workplace to develop proactive policies for women...It's not over yet, but there have already been a lot of positive changes and this issue clearly needed to be forced in this way in order to become an urgent priority. Of course, cancer can still come bite me in the butt again (and again!), but for the moment I find that pushing to create change for problems that are bigger than my own, is a lot of fun

Thanks, Lynne!! It's easier than I thought it would be, these lawyers really know how to deal with these issues nowadays, its not like it was even a decade ago- women need to force the issue. even though its the last thing the guys want to hear about, but anyway there's nothing like a stage IV diagnosis to stiffen your spine..

Dresses and hats, on the way to the racetrack at Keeneland. (I'm sitting, white hat).

18 years of friendship.

Caryn, you are always very positive in attitude and it rubs off! You too Lynne, you have such a fresh and upbeat perspective, I really love it. Thanks so much for the congrats! No date set yet but I have a feeling it will be next summer-isa. It likely won't be near us, more likely Santa Barbara where they live now. I think she will do something simple, elegant with just the right amount of glam. Definitely not too expensive as neither set of parents has a lot of money to help out. I would rather see them save it for a house anyway. But I can guarantee her dress will be something perfect! Good for you on the trip planning. We are trying to get something planned that is special but won't totally break the bank.

Yay Stilts, Maybe we can virtual shop together for Mother of the Bride dresses! Gracie, I love taking photos and have always been the family photographer until my son suddenly bloomed into a real master. I hope he is going to shoot the wedding!

Cure-ious, I have found since my Dx that I am much more bold in seeking out justice and equality in my work environment. I have become rather outspoken on union issues and find it very satisfying. You go! Best of luck.

Divine, thanks and I will. I am on Spring vacation this week and am taking a small two day road trip on my own to just trip around San Francisco and take pictures, one of my major art passions.

Steph, What a fun day! You gals look great. You are so fortunate to have a whole group of supportive women!

What I anticipated as an awful day at my ONC office surprisingly left me with a great sense of relief! I finally have in my possession a notarized copy of my Health Care Directives ! This was after receiving a request in January to make an appt with the office staff person who helps patients complete them. Of course my first thought was geez...they must think the end is near for me. She explained the notice goes out to all their patients regardless of diagnosis or condition and was actually glad for the feedback. Done...now praying things stay under control so I can be around for DDs wedding next year

I have to say, I had a somewhat similar feeling as you two, Stilts and Artist, back in 2013. My niece got engaged and the wedding was set for the following year. My three sisters, a very close friend of the family and another niece all went to Atlanta to help my niece pick her wedding gown. It remains one of the best experiences of my life. And most memorable: among a group of women with often extremely different opinions, when my niece walked out of the dressing room in that one gown, we all hands down agreed "that was the one".

And I hoped and prayed to be around for the wedding...sure enough, dh, ds and I flew down in May 2014 for another wonderful visit and the ceremony. Hard to believe it was three years ago already!

Also, my son was a senior in high school at the time of my diagnosis. So I was thrilled and very much aware of being present when he graduated magna cum laude from college four years later. Hard to believe that ceremony was two years ago!

So exciting with all the weddings on the horizon. Congratulations to everyone. I was another one that really thought I wasn't going to see a child get married much less see a grandchild. Both prayers were answered for me. This is such an important and memorable day in your lives. Enjoy every moment.

Love that singlemom! I'll cheers to that.

You too Divine, nice story. I can't wait to hear about your son's wedding down the road!

Thanks Liz, start shopping for that special dress in January! Winter wear could be fun!

I think Kandy needs another pregnancy announcement! LOL! Hope you are feeling OK....