Scared to death

I'm not really sure why your post seems to have lines through most of it, but as someone with lung mets I thought I'd try to reply.  I had bilateral pleural effusions when I was diagnosed with mets similar to you since an analysis of the fluid showed it was my old BC come back to haunt me.  My pulmonologist put in a indwelling catheter so I would be able to drain my lungs regularly.  This was a year and a half ago and I had the catheter first on the right and when it spontaneously pleurodesised, they took that one out and put one in on the other side.  I am not her2 positive just er/pr, but I am back to jogging again.  I was on femara alone for the first year and a half when I had progression in my liver.  I'm now on faslodex/ibrance.  So there is hope! 

ApnTx2ap,

There is so much hope. Firstly, you have lung mets. In the hierarchy of mets, lung is #2. The "best" mets are bone, followed by lung, followed by liver. I guess it's because you've got lots of bones, two lungs, but just the one liver. Mind you, this is just my opinion based on what I've read over the years and has no real medical validity, but I'm still wildly committed to it.

Next, you have many treatment modalities in that you can benefit from anti-hormonals and HER2 treatments, in addition to plain old chemotherapy.

Try to stay away from Dr. Google, as it has lots of bad data. This site is sane, as well as anything put out by the American Cancer Society. PM a member by the name of Bestbird, and ask for her treatment guide. My family is in the medical business, and I have to say that for a layperson, her research is top notch, and superior to anything I've read designed for a cancer patient.

In Cancerland, this is not a horrifying diagnosis. Granted, nobody wants cancer, but we have tons of research and new drugs aimed at our disease.

I've had a few, brief, bouts of SOB, and it sucks. Oxygen starvation can really freak one out. I'm so happy you are getting medical attention!

Here's my old crone advice for living through and with stage 4: stop thinking about life expectancy. We are born into this world with no guarantees. Concentrate on living as well as you can each day.

Have I done this? Hell no, but it's a goal. If you get all wrapped up in how much time you have left, it is too easy to disparage the time you have now. Please forgive me for being bossy, but I want you to thrive.

How are you fixed for support? Are you doing this alone? There are ladies here who are really hooked in to community support, and they have great advice. I can barely get my kid to empty the dishwasher, so I recommend you do better than I have. Asking for help is hard, but necessary.

So may hugs from afar. It sounds like you are familiar with getting a treatment plan in place, after tasting each stage of this disease. But, it really does get better once you've done that, doesn't it? In a perfect world, time would stop until the doctors get back to you, and all tests would have results Right Now, as the waiting part suuuuuucks.

Keep us posted. Welcome to the club no one wants to join, but - OMG - these ladies have kept me sane over the years, and I wish there were a better way than cancer to meet them.