Depression for no good reason

I had PTSD like symptoms. I had a lot of trouble concentrating. Things I like to do like watch tv and read went out the window. Regardless of age and stage a BC dx is a shock, and often triggers grief among other things. Recovery is a process that can't be hurried. Be gentle with yourself. Here us an interesting thread you may be able to relate to. Big hug to you. https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/91/topics...

Also Arimidex made me incredibly fatigued by early afternoon.

One of the biggest myths among laypeople is that there has to be a “reason for" or “cause of" depression. Depression is a disorder in itself, not necessary a symptom of anything else. It can be triggered by a traumatic event, but the seeds were there regardless. It is an imbalance in brain chemistry, not just a “mood" or “emotional" disorder. Even the earliest and mildest BC diagnosis--and the process leading up to it--is traumatic stress, and PTSD sometimes happens. Depression is a component of that as is anxiety. It strikes out of the blue, and it has nothing to do with your abilities to cope. My trigger was the circulating testosterone from carrying a son wearing off 6 weeks after childbirth--but the tendency was already there (in my case inherited).

Stop wondering why you feel this way and whether or not you should.....you just do. Ask your care team for help, be good to yourself, and until the fog lifts by whatever means (meds, time or both) follow your instincts to take it easy. Surgery produces fatigue, and you went through a lot of it fairly recently. Sometimes it hits on a delayed basis, after you've gotten through the pro-active part and the adrenaline that kept you focused has worn off. Listen to your body--and your brain is part of your body.

I felt exactly like that after finishing chemo, which I guess was supposed to be when I would be all happy about being done with chemo? Started antidepressants, and that made it all better again. Depression doesn't need a reason. It just is.

you just lost two body parts. grieving is normal.

now get off your butt and go make the nearest stage 4 person some soup. just kidding.

Mom2four, it sounds like clinical depression to me. I feel like I am in the same boat. I was on my way to the medical oncologist this morning and suddenly felt sad and wanted to cry. She told me that I am cured, and scheduled a follow-up with the NP for 3 months. This feeling has not lifted, even with the good news. I am already being t^{reated for depression, and just told my psychiatrist yesterday that I was doing well. I came through three surgeries this summer without a problem. Why now? Maybe I feel like my support is being withdrawn, and I'm not ready to deal with the aftermath on my own? I'm still healing from the sentinel node dissection done last week. And I am still seeing the plastic surgeon regarding the reconstruction. I'll be having some appointments with an occupational therapist. The cancer may be gone, but things won't be back to normal for a couple of more months.}

You aren't being a baby and this isn't a contest. You've been through a lot.  Any health condition can be difficult, but breast cancer is particularly devastating due to the treatments we have to undergo. Our whole sense of femininity is assaulted. There, I said it--assaulted. You might think that's a pretty strong word, but it describes what we have gone through exactly.  Not only have we been assaulted by cancer, but we've been assaulted by our oncologists and surgeons. I think the real question should be, why don't we ALL have PTSD?

Mom, I had the same feelings about those pics. I felt thoroughly shamed to have those pics taken, and I have several sets done. My MO, BS, and two PSs took pictures, and in front of DH, too. Im a fat girl with a big tummy, which is particularly unlovely now that my breasts are gone. I felt humiliated having to reveal myself to him that way.

Mom2four, you are expressing everything that I feel. I was Stage 1 also, and feel a bit guilty for taking the title "breast cancer survivor" since I didn't go through chemo and radiation. But I did go through the worry, the BMX, and am still anticipating another surgery for reconstruction. Someday, I'll go back to work. What will that be like? If your symptoms continue, I think that you should see someone to help you through. There is help out there, if you are willing to accept it.

Hugs Johnnygirl. Sending love and light. Donna.

Thanks ladies. Every little word of encouragement really does help. 😚

I just wanted to share that ever since I had a reaction to Demarol last week that sent me to the ER (I was scared out of my mind) i've been suffering from what I assume is major anxiety. I almost never cried, am a pretty stable person, but now cry multiple time a day. I feel like I'm on the verge of a nervous breakdown, especially when night falls. During my appt. w/the PS yesterday for my first TE fill, he wrote a prescription for a low dose of Ativan. At least I was able to sleep some last night. I still woke up a couple times a night because of discomfort or night sweats, but I slept for more than 2 hrs. so am grateful. I really don't know what to think of this. I've never suffered from anxiety before, I was OK w/my diagnosis, OK heading into surgery, but i really think it was the med scare that sent my brain into overdrive and now I can't calm it down. Now, I fear that I'll be this way permanently and I certainly can't function like this. My fear feeds more fear.

Wise words, vlnrph..thank you! I feel consumed w/dr's appts as it is...need to make one w/opthamologist because my eyesight has changed dramatically since surgery...another concern...yet still praying it returns to normal. (my MX was Dec. 6) But, I'm sure the more I take control of what's going on...as you said perhaps get therapy...the better I'll feel knowing I'm moving in a forward direction. So true, that I can't give of myself when I feel there's very little in my reserves worth giving. Thanks for reaching out and have a Merry Christmas.

Mom2fourplusmore, I have NO IDEA how you've gotten through your surgeries without pain meds!! As we'd say in the south, "Bless your heart!" Seriously...you are an amazing warrior. Thanks for sharing your Demarol story...now I know I'm not alone. I had been on hydrocodone which worked fine for pain (though it made me sleepier than I liked) but I was still constipated 10 days after surgery, so the PS thought maybe switching pain meds would help because HC is notorious for binding you up. I won't go into my experience because it causes me anxiety to think about it, but I know I will NEVER take it again. I've heard others in the medical field say it was taken off the market and they were surprised to hear that it was still available.

So when you say you lost your eyesight to the scopolamine patch, was it a temporary loss? Assuming it has returned, how long did it take? How are you feeling now? How have you handled Tamoxifen? I'm certainly concerned to take anything now that I've never had before, yet am pretty certain that's what will be prescribed for me. I've met w/the oncologist once prior to surgery and she said that's what I would probably be prescribed. Don't know about chemo yet.

You're an inspiration and such an encourager. Thank you for taking the time to share your experience with me.