3-16-2011.... I love your approach. Those 3 questions are simple yet powerful. Thank you for sharing. I will try this.

One common prescription for happiness and contentedness is to cultivate gratitude.

There are a wealth of resources online and in bookstores to help with this.

I enjoy a daily reminder from www.gratefulness.org

Today's word for the day:

No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.

AESOP

There is much clinical research that shows the positive benefit of supplements for cancer. Highly recommend Cucurmin, Green Tea, Resveratrol, for inflammation. Maybe it was getting on the Letrozole but my bone mets and lung nodules have decreased by 40% over the past 6 months from Letrozole, supplements and Far Infrared therapy done at home with my own FIR pad. Good luck!

A great book to read that includes the scientific 'why it works' is "Anticancer: A New Way of Life, New Edition" by Dr. David Servan-Schreiber. This is where I started and then I researched further from there on scientific research websites.

Hi Carol,

I hope we hear of others' dances with happiness.

Yesterday, I read on another topic that your diagnosis may have expanded based on an imaging exam. Of course the ground feels wobbly under you and you'll hold onto the magic RR formula more tightly.

I'm reading an excellent book - Krista Tippett's Becoming Wise: An Inquiry into the Mystery and Art of Living

Here's an excerpt from a recent On Being conversation where she's the guest, rather than the host:

"There is this great puzzle about life that things go wrong, right? Perfection can be a goal, but it's never a destination. And this has given rise across history to the whole theodicy debate. If there — how could there be a good God, or how could the universe, the balance of the universe be good when there's so much suffering? And so that question is there and it's real, and reasonable.

"But then there is also this paradox that we are so often made by what would break us. And I think this is where our spiritual traditions, where spiritual life is so redemptive and necessary, because this is the place in life that says — that honors the fact that there's darkness — but also says "And you can find meaning right there," right? Not — it's not overcoming it. It's not beyond it. It's not in spite of it. What goes wrong doesn't have to define us but, I mean, again, to come back to what wisdom is, as I've seen it, it's people who walk through whatever darkness, whatever hardship, whatever imperfection and unexpected catastrophes or the like, the huge and the ordinary losses of any life, who walk through those and integrate them into wholeness on the other side. That you're whole and healed, not fixed. Not in spite of those things, but because of how you have let them be part of you."

-- Krista Tippett conversation with Pico Iyer http://www.dailygood.org/story/1334/the-mystery-and-art-of-living-on-being/

Carole, my morning is limited by my own needs, but I want you to know that I read and heard and feel you. You are not alone and we are connected.

I do trust that your current struggle is part of your growth process and that sometimes muscle breaks down, so it can be built up stronger and anew.

warmest of healing hugs, Stephanie

Carol, just wanted to let you know that I connected with your post and have similiar feelings often. I find feelings of depression tend to weave in and out with various levels of strength. Sometimes I feel I am doing pretty good and then something on the more minor side happens and I find myself a mess! It seems like I am using all my emotional reserve to handle having this disease on a daily basis and then when a relatively minor but unexpected thing happens I lose it as I don't have any emotional reserve or coping skills left.

Amen, singlemom. I haven't heard anyone else express that. I used to handle so much and now I can't handle anything hardly at all now. Ironic that people call us "strong" when I fall into a puddle at one more problem.

Carol, what I have done is try to note what I was doing when I feel happy or good. Do more of that. When my mood has turned downward, what triggered that and stop doing that. Simple right.? I do urge you to go out with friends. Talk about normal, non cancer things. Be the person you are outside of this. Maybe you won't eat perfect but you can get close. I also do some healing meditations from you tube and they do make me feel calmer and more peaceful.

I haven't read this book but it's a fascinating topic. I had seen her website a year or two ago. I have radically changed my diet. It gives me some sense of control and accomplishment. Working next on the other things on the list!

My mom sent me the following quote, which has been attributed to Abraham Lincoln. I don't know if he really said it but it hit home.

"I have noticed that most people in this world are about as happy as they have made up their minds to be."

You could look at this as blaming the victim, especially when some of us have legitimately more to be unhappy about than others. But in my experience it just rings true. Overall I am happy - happier than I was before the BC - but stuff happens that drags me down, and as others have mentioned sometimes the breast cancer just piles onto whatever is bothering you. If you're like me you want a permanent pass on other problems in life after having to deal with cancer.

The one time I let myself get truly down in the dumps - like bedridden with depression - was due to some family problems and feeling sorry for myself on top of the breast cancer. I don't know where it came from but it just suddenly dawned on me that I could stop feeling that way anytime I wanted to. So I vowed to myself to feel better and just got out of bed and did it. That was a first for me, and I have tried to actively make up my mind to feel happy since then. I'm not strong enough to let every problem roll off my back without affecting me at all. Stressful things happen, but I am recovering more quickly than I used to. Another big family thing happened last week, and what usually might have taken me a week or longer to get over, was gone in a weekend.

This is a tricky discussion because you don't want to make anyone feel badly for being unable to achieve the same level of peace as you have. I also know things could change for me at any time depending on the severity of life's problems, but I put it out there just because it's working for me right now. Sometimes we don't realize what is possible until we witness another person's good results.

I stubbornly resist thinking of breast cancer as a learning experience, but I can't deny that I'm a better person than I was a year ago, both physically and mentally.

Interesting press release about dietary changes - successful and unsuccessful approaches:

Your Diet Plan Isn't Working? New Baylor Research Explains Why

• 
• Successful dieters focus on adding healthy foods – foods that they actually like, according to new research by Meredith David, Ph.D., assistant professor of marketing. (iStock)

July 11, 2016

Study shows health-plan successes determined by 'approach' or 'avoidance' strategies

Media contact: Eric M. Eckert, office: (254) 710-1964, mobile: (254) 652-0398

Follow Eric on Twitter: @EricBaylorU

Follow Baylor Media Communications on Twitter: @BaylorUMedia

WACO, Texas (July 11, 2016) – Many diet plans are doomed from the start.

The reason? Dieters tend to adopt the wrong strategies, often planning to ditch their favorite foods and replace them with less-desirable options, according to new research from Baylor University's Hankamer School of Business.

Conversely, successful dieters focus on adding healthy foods – foods that they actually like, said Meredith David, Ph.D., assistant professor of marketing at Baylor. She is the lead author on the study, "Saying 'No' to Cake or 'Yes' to Kale: Approach and Avoidance Strategies in Pursuit of Health Goals," published in the journal Psychology & Marketing.

"Our research shows that instead of creating rules to avoid one's favorite treats, dieters should focus on eating healthy foods that they enjoy," David said. "Dieters who restrict themselves from consuming the foods they love most may be setting themselves up for failure. Instead, they may be better off by allowing occasional 'treats' and focusing attention on healthy foods that they enjoy and making it a point to include those tasty, but healthy foods in their diet."

The outcomes of the research – three studies and a total of 542 study participants – hinged on a person's level of self-control.

"In coming up with plans to enhance one's health and well-being, low self-control individuals tend to set themselves up for a harder pathway to success by focusing on avoiding the very foods they find most tempting," David said. "Our data reveals that individuals who are generally more successful at reaching their goals tend to develop more motivating plans regarding the inclusion of healthy, well-liked items and the exclusion of unhealthy items that are not one's favorites."

The research found:

• When asked to list specific rules that individuals might use to guide their food consumption, a large percentage of individuals listed rules that involve restricting and avoiding certain foods. This was particularly the case among low self-control individuals – those who generally have less success in reaching their goals. Individuals who are generally more successful in goal pursuit tended to list rules that involved things they should approach and/or consume.

• When thinking of unhealthy foods to avoid as a part of a diet, low self-control individuals think of foods that they really like – their favorite snacks, and most tempting items. High self-control individuals think of foods that they like but could reasonably forgo.

• When thinking of healthy foods to eat as a part of a diet, low self-control individuals think of foods they do not like, such as those that they find highly unpalatable (e.g., Brussels sprouts). High self-control individuals think of foods they enjoy eating (e.g., strawberries).

"Frequent attention is given to health advice surrounding well-intentioned lists of 'magical' foods that everyone should eat or practically 'poisonous' foods that people should avoid consuming," David said. "The next time you decide to go on a diet or seek to improve your health by altering your food consumption, opt for strategies that focus on including healthy foods in your diet, and focus specifically on those healthy foods that you really enjoy eating."

Kelly L. Haws, Ph.D., associate professor of marketing at Vanderbilt University, co-authored the study.

Hey Carol finally I found you guys I'm a radical remission junky. I bought the book about a month ago and have been reading it only when I'm down and it helps every time it's like medicine thanks you Kelly Turner. I have so many people telling me it's all hog wash and hype I disagree. I really believe there is a lot we don't know or understand about our bodies and with this book Kelly Turner has stuck her finger into the pie. She has started something great something that gives hope to thousands so yeah.

Maybe we could discuss what parts of the book we found especially interesting or profound? Just a thought take care ladies love the thread.

Wendy

Still have to read the book but here's a listing of sweetener GIs:

http://www.sugar-and-sweetener-guide.com/glycemic-...

I'm with you on the healing trips, Deanna!

TM = tumor markers (I had to look it up too)

Heidihill, thanks for that excellent list! Very helpful!

lala1 ~ As barb said, TM = tumor markers -- what the CA27-29 or CEA or CA15-3 tests measure. In the book, a radical remission prostate cancer patient kept a food diary to see if his diet affected his TMs, and it did. His TMs rose with meat, dairy and sugar products, including agave nectar, which is low on the glycemic index, but still had a negative effect on his TMs.

TwoHobbies, are you actually checking your glucose levels with a meter and test strips? And how are you fasting? You probably know this, but Valter Longo @ USC (I think he's still here; not sure) has researched and written extensively on the benefit of fasting for cancer patients. If you haven't read some of his stuff, I highly recommend it. Here's a little piece for those not familiar w/him. (I'm also a big fan of Dan Buettner's Blue Zones research.)

https://www.bluezones.com/2016/04/fasting-for-long...

There actually is another supplement product on the market -- not Dr. Longo's ProLon -- something by Elysium Health, which also has an impressive slate of founders -- that also mimics the positive effects of fasting. Unfortunately, my UCLA onc didn't think adding it to my regimen was advisable at the moment, but it's been on my radar for awhile now. https://www.elysiumhealth.com/team