Frustrated and upset by my lack of IRL help and support

Diagnosed last month with IDC in left breast. This is just the latest in a series of crisis I've suffered over the past several years, and I already had high anxiety levels and and PTSD. I am now the single mother of two younger kids, and have no family around to help me, and only a few friends.

after I was diagnosed I talked to the social worker last month at the main hospital that has a cancer center, where I would probably go for any radiology or chemo. When I first met with her she ticked off ways she could find help for me.

But when I talked to her last week, almost everything she had mentioned was a no go. I am too far out of that hospital area for volunteers near the hospital to bring me meals (even though that hospital is only 10 miles away), my insurance company won't pay for any help unless I have a mastectomy, etc. Not sure if she would be able to arrange rides either.

I did register for Cleaning for a Reason. And I called the American Cancer Society and they gave me a couple local groups. But when I looked up one of them, it says they will only help if I need chemo, or am disabled because of cancer. I am keeping their number

Another local group I talked to said they may be able to find me help (using grant money), I just need my Drs office to register with them saying I do have cancer. Its just I've been burned before, so until I actually see the help coming, I'm not getting my hopes up.

Anyway all this has only increased my anxiety and upset, because I worry what will happen to me and my kids if I have even a shorter period of time where I can't function and do stuff. Plus, I work part-time at a small company and only get paid for the hours I work, so again if I can't work for any period of time it will be a financial hit.

The one saving grace is my former husband and I are not legally divorced so I am still on his company's health insurance which is pretty good. And he is helpful with the kids, but that's a huge double bind because I could write a book about what I've been thru with him and his serious issues (severe midlife crisis, addicted to pot and porn, much younger girlfriend living with him who is so messed up herself I've been told by 3 therapists my kids shouldn't be around her. So I can't even get a break by having him take the kids to his apartment)