Dear friends and breast cancer community,

Immediately after my diagnosis, I experienced the same sense of fear, shock and bewilderment that many of you probably felt at your time of diagnosis. Breast cancer was simply not on my radar nor in my vocabulary. After my diagnosis, I spoke with one or two trusted friends, and despite the fact that I come from strong alternative health and healing traditions, I immediately decided to trust the western medical community. I felt that alternative therapies would be essential for my post-treatment healing and recovery.

However, I was not prepared for the discrepancy between doctors in the recommended course of treatment. Firstly, I received different advice from two doctors on the same oncology team. The radiation oncologist insisted that I take part in a neoadjuvant clinical trial while my surgeon said that there would be no benefit to me. Because they were in disagreement, I had to rely on my own intuition, and not the collaborative advice of both doctors. Since the imaging showed a tumor of at least 5 CM, I decided that I would not purse a clinical trial to see if my tumor shrank before surgery. I did not want to wait several months before removing such a large tumor. The radiation oncologist, as well as my partner, continued to pressure me into considering the neoadjuvant therapy clinical trial.

Thankfully, my partner helped me see that a second opinion was in order. The second team who evaluated me respected my decision without pressure. In fact, when the tumor was removed, it was found to be 5.5 CM, and there was evidence that the cancer spread to my sentinel lymph node. In one month, my diagnosis went from IIA to IIIA.In my post-op visit, my surgeon commended me on listening to my heart and my intuition. Somehow, I knew that I should not wait around to see if the tumor shrank.

The moral of this story: seek the advice of the best medical teams you can access. Then decide what is right for you. It's your body, your life, your call. This disease is giving you an opportunity to trust yourself. As I wrote in the beginning, this does NOT mean you shouldn't trust your doctors. This post is also not a indictment of neoadjuvant therapy clinical trials - it just wasn't right for me. If something doesn't feel right, go for that second opinion, if you can. It made all the difference for me.

Sending out positive healing thoughts to those who are finding the way through a diagnosis of breast cancer.