Can we have a forum for "older" people with bc?

Praying for your brother, Carole.

The rain is coming to our area. It is getting darker by the minute....we can use some, but the leaves are falling and will be hard to rake.

All limitations are self imposed.
Oliver Wendell Holmes

Yay for you too Jean -- glad you can get back to us easier.

Jackie

Carole, sorry to hear about your brother. Will add him to prayer list.

Requests to add my dh John to your prayer list too everyone. He may be diabetic, broken vertebra, bursitis, in a lot of pain and dealing with me.

Jackie, love this: "All limitations are self imposed. - Oliver Wendell Holmes"

Rough day at work today. I made some errors at work that I've made before and am being called on it. I have to start thinking of my mind and body as surviving and well, instead of "cancer brain." I feel bad for my work quality, but I'm not 100% right now. And, I'm not perfect, but I already have solutions in mind when I talk to my boss tomorrow.

I have to ask G-d for help - this is too big for me. Like everyone else, I need my job and insurance. Wish I was closer to retirement and able to do that, but I'll probably have to work longer than 65-66. (I'm going to be 61 on Sat.) It seems strange to wish I was older, so I wish I was younger and that my mind would retain more and be more open.

Maybe my depression is affected more by the cancer, I don't know. People at work now are saying like, "I know people who died from cancer, survived cancer, but ... gotta do your job." I've signed up for counseling in 2 weeks. I have to change the way I eat, add exercise, and figure out a way to stop smoking under all this stress with this dis-ease and my BIL and now my husband's been home from work sick.

Tears are building up again ... like the 4th time today. So I'm again going to cry myself to sleep.

Thanks for listening,

Linda

Carolye,

We're praying for your brother's full recovery and sending cyber hugs to you both.

Carole- prayers and hugs for you and your brother and the whole family.

Linda- I am in awe of you even being aBle to work thru treatment. I waS a wet noodle most of the time. I didn't drive a car from the time I started chemo until I recovered from surgery six months later. My DD and her husband took very good care of me. If I had an appt on a day he had off ( his work schedule changes week to week), he would take me to it, and if it meant he saw me topless, we were both okay with that. Also, Puffin had excellent advice, but have you thought of lessening your workload for a while? I believe your company has to accommodate any limitations you may have, because of the Disabity Act. I am not sure what type of work you do, but could some of it be done by others temporarily? Just a thought.

I have been very sad this week. A very good friend passed away very suddenly from a massive heart attack. They had just gotten back from 3 weeks in the Canary Islands just outside Spain. Other than cruises, they had never left the country before. Their younger son had met a girl there when he wAs in the military and they got married in a civil ceremony, always planning to go back to Spain for a full, traditional, church wedding someday. Ten years later they finally got to do that. We have all been following their trip on Facebook and it looked like they were having a fabulous time. I have met his wife, and if she is any indication, her family welcomed Bill and Carol and left no stone unturned to give them the vacation of a life time. Carol's only other dream was to be a grandmother. Her granddaughter will celebrate her first birthday the day Carol is buried. They now live in Orlando. I will not be able to go to the funeral but will be in Orlando in a few weeks to celebrate my brother's 60th birthday and I will go over to see them while I am there. Such a jarring reminder that we have no clue when our time will be up, so we better make sure we use the time we have to it's fullest, whatever that is to each of us.

Wishing all of you a day filled with good things,

Ann

Carole, so sorry to hear that your brother has been having a hard time of it. I will certainly add him to my list or prayers.

Ann, it is so sad to lose a friend. I am glad that she got to have such a wonderful vacation before she left us. I'm sure she was very lucky to have you for a friend.

The past three days have been very gray and dismal around here. You would think that I would take the opportunity to get some of the things done that need to be done in this house but the dismal weather has the opposite effect on me. I can't get motivated to do anything. I really do need the sunshine to get me going.

Oh Linda, I wish I was closer. I'd give you giant hugs to help you deal with all the things that you are trying to deal with right now. Puffin has given you good advice. Since it is so hard to multi-task when going through the treatments, take one thing at a time and just recheck your work. Hey, I still have trouble multi-tasking but it gets better with time. I always find that physical activity helps keep my mind sharper. Guess if we get up and move we get that blood flowing better to the brain. :-) Hang in there! You are going through a depressing and scary time but you can get through it if you just take one day at a time.

I guess I will just give up trying to be productive and grab a good book and escape! :-)

Gosh, it is always something isn't it ????

Linda, I really liked that suggestion of doing only those REALLY have to things and hopefully then being able to have a deep focus on getting them done and in good shape when finished. Probably I would do better even -- so I hope you can take a couple of suggestions like that to heart. Also, Puffin with the Live Strong YMCA if there is one close enough to you. You have a lot on your plate --- and some just has to go on I know --- so easy for someone to tell you things, but I do think during this time --- things that will help you get back to you -- and therefore be better towards every one around you at some point really should be considered.

I hate to tell you ---- I'm still working at 70 because the rug does go out from under you when there is a BIG illness. I didn't expect to be 'broke' for my old age, but I'm trying to wear it like my Sunday best. In fairness to you though I might add --- I only work part time. Not sure how Dh and I would make it though if I didn't. No time for you to laugh about it now, but after I got MUCH better I've usually said something --- like, I have it all figured out -- I can retire about two weeks before I shuffle off to the employer in the sky.

I'm ok actually because I don't really work hard ( take care of a lady who is 99 ) and her people ( SIL is a Dr. and daughter ) are some of the easiest people I've ever worked for. They never complain and if they know I need something ( I've been careful now for a good while with what I say ) they will go somewhere in the house and come back with a $100.00 bill -- it is not to be paid back -- it is a gift of help and that's that. Sometimes they take a few days off and I stay at their house and take care of my little lady and the two sweet dogs until they return. I'm paid the same amt. while I'm sleeping as I'm paid the rest of the time --- so believe me, I don't make a ton of money ( unless they go away ) but the conditions for a 70 yr. old make it easy on me.

Anne, nothing to say but express my sorrow at the loss of your friend. You are so very, very right --- we don't know the appointed day or hour. I'm so glad that not only the trip was possible but the great little grandbaby. Of course, me being me, I would say the Universe KNEW her desires and found a way to grant them. I'm glad you will be able to share some time with the rest of your friend's family.

See you all later.

Blessings

Jackie

Anne, I'm so sorry for the loss of your friend. But it sounds like they had a wonderful adventure before. It's so hard to lose a friend or family member. I'm glad you'll be able to spend some time in FL with the family.

To clarify, I have NOT had chemo, don't need it, and I haven't even started radiation yet. My next step is to see the RO.

There's a cancer program offering counseling, yoga and massage. I left the form with my Dr. yesterday to approve. I'll check with the Y to see. Free is good (just got the new mortgage tax bill and of course, there's an escrow shortage). I'm not one for exercise, I have arthritis and COPD, but I'll try it. I know I have to eat better too and stop smoking.

I'm meeting with my boss today to show him a new checklist I created to check my work. Focus is my new expression for "Fuck off cancer, you suck". and will be my keyword. On on hand work people say they hope I'm recovering and support me, but they're also saying my work isn't up to par and it needs to be error-free (on what planet). Maybe there are Disability Laws, but I can't afford to be unpaid, being the main breadwinner in the family.

Today I can do this.

My surgeon told me she's very proud of me; that I'm healing well and I've handled this with dignity, grace and a positive attitude. So, that makes me feel good (and after I left I cried, of course). She also told me to take some time for me and to rest so last night I did really go to sleep at 9pm and today I feel well rested.

Jackie, I agree that the Universe knew her wishes. I am listening to a Dr. Wayne Dyer CD set and I heard more about how our thoughts can be limiting and it clicked with me. If I believe I am limitless in my mind, with G-d help, I can focus and do what I need to do. He said it better.

ChiSandy - I do want to cherish each moment and look for the good things. Gotta start journaling and my positive list again.

I accept all of your hugs and prayers. I am a survivor and maybe I forget that sometimes.

Will let you all know the rest of the saga later.

Linda

Have to go to work this a.m. so this will be quick and I'll maybe get to come back after work. Linda it was good to hear you are studying with " Wayne Dyer ". In my spiritual and trying to understand it all, he has been a real go to for information that usually "clicks" heavily with me. I love to pick up resonance with those who help me so much to interpret my own often terrifically jumbled feelings and emotions. There are many authors I have sought out and often the way I 'found' them was just paying attention in the spiritual section at the book store. Usually ( about trusting your own intuition which is a fantastic guide ) I would read the fly-leaf and know instantly if I should take the book or not.

As far as exercise you may be able to find some ( your C.O.P.D. Dr. might have a source for you ) fairly passive ones that might help, but just a suggestion and I'd certainly think that Dr. should have some input and give you an ok.

Overnight was really cool --- towards the 30's though out here in the woods we don't always get the total brunt but likely won't get much more than 60's if that today. Typical. I think we had a small taste of Indian summer and that may be all we have. Hoping for another few days of warmth to sneak in for us. There is sun today after drizzles and mostly gray yesterday. So, didn't have to turn my artificial sun on --- but I was out most of the day so couldn't have anyway. My true downfall from gray takes a couple of constant gray days so made it through ok.

Going to the gym for a walk after work. I'm not in bad shape ( round being a shape ) but as my schedule has been crazy I'm in the mode of not losing an ounce since the body here thinks it is being starved when its not --- I'll get back into proper alignment and get going again. Thinking of the quote now " give me patience Lord, but hurry ". Hope you all have a stunning day. See you later.

Blessings,

Jackie

Linda: sorry I made the assumption about the chemo, glad you don't need it. Suggestions should still apply, and hope they work for you

Thank you for your concern, GG.

Today was busy. I went to the gym this morning and had some good exercise. Later I picked up my mother and my younger sister and the three of us had a nice lunch at one of our favorite places. Then this afternoon I had a hair trim and color and I was pleased with the result. All in all, it was a satisfying Thursday.

I finished my first crocheted hat and it came out ok. I don't think the design was the best. I'm starting a different hat and we'll see how it goes. I'm learning some new stitches I had not done before so that's fun and challenging. I'll post some pictures later.

What a gorgeous day outside -- but really cool this a.m. I have several things planned. I went on Wednesday to the big shopping center 73 miles to the west of us which is very near the bridge over the Missouri river that takes you into St. Louis, Mo. Looking for shoes which I did not find. So -- I will start the process today of spending that money on my hair which is in just as bad shape as my shoes. First starting with a hair-cut. I'm still playing with the idea --- do I want to stop getting perms in favor of an easy 'straight' style -- or maybe going to a straighter style with maybe a body perm. Sigh !!!! This is why I spend as little time as I can in front of a mirror --- I take a look at myself and think oh my --- what in the world can I do about that !!!!!

It's great NOT to be very vain which I'm not, but then I don't want to be too flamboyant about making others put up with 'what you see is what you get' which doesn't quite seem fair if I can actually do something better. Oh well -- it will come to me I guess.

Our ground outside sure has a lot of leaves on it. They ( I think ) have dried out pretty good but don't know if Dh is going to do anything with them or not. He has been getting more migraines lately, and our yard may go to pot a bit if he can't figure out what is going on with that.

I'll likely be back here lately. I am thinking of all of you and hoping you have a fabulous Friday.

Blessings,

Jackie

Today was a beautiful day here, too. I played golf poorly but enjoyed being outdoors.

Anne, what a contrast in those two pregnant women in your family! I think about that famous poem by Robert Burns with the line, "If only we could see ourselves as others see us." Maybe if your DIL could just realize how anxious she is about everything, she could get some help with counseling or practice some self help. I feel sorry for your son, the husband.

DH just got home from golf so I'll chat with him.

Luvmaui, what a beautiful view. Good to have you check in. My dx and surgery were also in 2009 so we're "classmates." I got the name and number of a women who does cleaning for a golfing friend. I have to negotiate a price before I'll hire her because our house is only 2000 sq. ft. and there are two rooms, the guest room and the office that wouldn't require regular cleaning. I'm not willing to pay what the golf friend pays. Her house is bigger.

It was nice not to have to get up at any certain time this morning. DH was up at 6:30 and off at 7:30 since he's playing in a golf tournament. I'm hoping to get myself to the gym and then catch up on ironing. The hanging rack in the laundry room is full. It's mostly touch up pressing.

The sky is overcast and I think the weather is supposed to be cloudy today with rain later and rain tomorrow.

I'm wishing a good Saturday for everyone.