Mother Newly Diagnosed

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Blueheart31
Blueheart31 Member Posts: 4
edited May 2015 in IDC (Invasive Ductal Carcinoma)

My mother was diagnosed 4/27/15 with IDC and I'm extremely afraid of what's to come. I've always supported the breast cancer cause but never really educated myself on it. We aren't quite sure what stage it's in but in my heart I feel that it's at least the 3rd stage (due to her dimpling in the breast) and I need to be assured that this isn't the end of my best friend's life. Is there anyone in a similar situation? Or anyone that has been through this? I'm trying so hard to keep faith and be strong for her but deep down inside I'm a terrified baby afraid to be separated from her mother forever

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited May 2015

    Dear Blueheart, Welcome to the BCO community. We are sorry to hear of your mom's breast cancer but we are glad that you reached out here. Here is a link to information on our website about Staging IDC. Hopefully this can help in addition to the information that our members can share. We appreciate how scary this can be but try not to jump to the worst thoughts. You also may want to visit the forum for Caregivers and connect with other daughters who are supporting their moms. Hang in there. The Mods

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  • inks
    inks Member Posts: 746
    edited May 2015

    So sorry your mom has to go through this. You can't put your mom at stage III simply based on dimpling. Most stage III have something in the lymphnodes too. I am barely stage 3, I had dimpling and micromets in a node. And even a higher stage is not the end of it. All the survival studies are based on data from 10 years or so ago and there has been improvement. Try not to show your mom how scared you are, she does not need to worry about you on top of the cancer. Stay positive and upbeat.

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  • kittysister
    kittysister Member Posts: 212
    edited May 2015

    I'm sorry about your mom's diagnosis. Many of us weren't that well educated on this subject, either. I hope you won't let your mind wander to the worst possible outcome. The initial shock and wondering how bad things are is hard. But if you read the boards, you'll see there SO are many of us still alive and kicking!

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  • Blueheart31
    Blueheart31 Member Posts: 4
    edited May 2015

    Thank you Inks for the encouragement. I'm doing very well not showing that I'm terrified and fully supporting her 100%. My mother is a very small woman (113lbs) and from what I hear about the treatments they take a toll on your body. I just want her to be healthy enough to fight this fight and not just give up. Now that I look back we missed a few signs that could have been warning signs such as (unexplained swollen neck glands that would last only a day or so) Prior to her diagnosis she was a overall healthy woman. Her appointment is this Monday to schedule a consult with a breast surgeon (recommended) and I plan to attend... and hopefully learn all I could about this terrible disease. It looks like you have been going through a lot yourself and I will keep you in prayer and thank you for your kindness.

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited May 2015

    Blueheart, First let me extend a great big hug to you. I know how scary this must be for you. We want our Mom's around forever and the thought of anything happening to them is terrifying!! Some people can have dimpling and not even have cancer, so you really can't go by that.

    I would suggest you take a great big deep breath and wait until her testing is done and her treatment plan is in place. In the meantime, spend some time educating yourself about the different treatment options. BCO is a wonderful resource to learn everything you need to know. There are so many of us here that have been through treatment, and we are all still driving our kids crazy for MANY years to come!!

    And please do visit the caregivers forum as suggested. It helps to talk to others in your same shoes.

    Best wishes to you both!

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  • Blueheart31
    Blueheart31 Member Posts: 4
    edited May 2015


    Kittysister, Thank you for your kind words as well. I do tend to think the worst sometimes and I'm really trying to think positive it's just always been one of my biggest fears. This is why I joined this group.... I want to learn how to cope and stay strong for her and hear about other fighters success stories. I will keep you all in prayer.

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  • Blueheart31
    Blueheart31 Member Posts: 4
    edited May 2015

    I will visit the caregivers forum thank you!

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  • kittysister
    kittysister Member Posts: 212
    edited May 2015

    Keep us posted here on your mother's progress!

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