As it turns out, I kinda like going flat

i have stopped wearing my Foob.  I have to wear compression a lot of the time due to truncal LE. When I'm not wearing the compression,, it is SUCH a relief to not have it on,, that I just go half flat.   Remember those days when you would get home from work and the first thing you wanted to do was take your bra off,,, well, that's me with my chest compression stuff!

Hi eheinrich! I am a Uni too! Although I do occasionally go half flat, I mostly wear a weighted foam form in a Mx camisole with pockets. I find it is the most comfy way to dress and I forget I am wearing a form. I don't have the LE issues that Glennie has, but if I go half flat, I like to wear a firm shape wear tank, because my remaining side is a "D" and I need to rail that side in. LOL I do have a wardrobe of foobs, boobs and Mx pocketed clothing, so I find dressing much easier, than when I first had my surgery. z

If I may suggest, when you go to the fitter for your fitting tomorrow, try on a lot of things so you get an idea of what suits you and how the different types of forms feel, you may well decide to go flat all the time, but if you do decide to wear a Mx bra and a form, you want it to be the most comfortable and best fit you can find. Then if you want any more items in the future, you know the size and the type you like and you can go shopping online, where there are often mega bargains.

There is a thread "All things bras and prosthesis" where we discuss different forms and clothing etc. Many women here, do go flat and fabulous most of the time, but they like to have some items for the times when they want to dress differently.

hahahahah, that is great, Mommy!!!  That's the way to repurpose those poofs.

Jersey, after 8 months my BS still thinks I am going to change my mind and do reconstruction.  When she finally got tired of me asking her when she was going to make me completely flat, she sent me to a PS, only to find out the PS didn't do the "flat" look.  I am still not happy with her and doubt I go back for my regular appointment with her in April. 

Every time I hear of another Surgeon, not believing a woman when she says "I won't be reconstructing" I feel the anger rising. I just can't believe how wrong it is, on so many levels.

It offends me so much, that any Surgeon, could choose to ignore the choice made by a patient about something that so much thought and deliberation went in to.

DO THEY NOT UNDERSTAND, the meaning of "make me flat" or "no reconstruction".  Just make sure you get a PS that does the "flat look".  I ranted about my BS sending me to a PS who did not do the "flat look".  And I got a bill to pay for that conference.  I should send it to my BS to pay!!!!!

What if you wanted to get your hair colored to cover the grey and the hairdresser decided on her own you would look good as a redhead? How would you react then?!?

Mommy2six, I have to know, what did she say or do, when you confronted her that way? Was there any remorse at all? Anything?

Great retort Chloesmom!

Nomatterwhat, they billed you for that? OMG, I would have gone ballistic. I am not really understanding the concept, of a surgeon who can't do the flat look, does it require, so much more skill?

This has become my bug bear, it makes me furious, when I hear of someone else waking up after this huge surgery and being disappointed with their result, because their Surgeon has completely disregarded their instructions and wishes and decided that they know, what's best.

I have said it before, here, I think it is bordering on criminal behavior and they should be accountable. They seem to forget, they work FOR us! Although they certainly have a roll in advising us of the options, they should never cross the line and blatantly change the procedure, once decided by us, to what really seems to be to suit their own ends. As it turns out in many cases, it is simply to make more money on the subsequent recon surgery. How gross and completely wrong on every level is that!

In saying all that, there will be times, when some revision may be necessary and it is not the Surgeon at fault. I stated, exactly what I wanted, a straight flat scar. I told my Surgeon that recon would never be something, I would want, so I stated my wishes. He was absolutely on board with that, even telling me that the door was not closed and if I decided to do it later, it would be an option. He also said that I should understand that if I decided to go that road, I would get a "mound" not a breast. I understood my options and went into my surgery confident that I would get what I asked for.

When I woke, my Surgeon was there and he said "I have done exactly what you asked for,it is so straight, I checked it with a spirit level!" In my drugged state I remember saying "Oh Wow, really!" and he laughed and said "No!" When I saw the scar the following morning. it was indeed a straight, flat scar, as far as I could see, under the clear dressing. When I got home and showed it to my Husband for the first time his reaction was "Oh wow, that will heal really well!" and the best thing anyone has said to me, before or since "You don't need 2 boobs, to be gorgeous!"

I digress, the reason I am saying all this is because over time I realized that what I had left, which was completely unintentional, was the flesh that is normally pulled forward, by the weight of the breast and it forms what is known as a "Dog Ear" under the arm.. When I saw my surgeon after all the dressing was removed, he explained that they have to stop the incision line somewhere and sometimes this flesh which is left over can remain and be annoying. Mine had the sensation of cut nerves, zapping away inside it and it had this habit of sneaking up and over the side of my bra. I waited for about 15 months, hoping it would stop irritating me, but when I realized it was here to stay, I approached my Surgeon about removing it. He didn't hesitate and agreed, but he wanted it to be done in the Hospital, with anesthetic. I didn't want to have another anesthetic so I managed to talk him into doing it with a local anesthetic, in his rooms with his Nurse, who does lots of procedures with him. He agreed and I had it done, the results are in photo form on breastfree.org.

I guess what I am saying here, is you can get a Surgeon who is absolutely committed, to what you want, and still get a result that isn't exactly right, first time, but it can be repaired, if you feel up for it. I don't blame my Surgeon in any way, this was not intentional and I have the result I wanted, with the exception for a glitch in my original scar, where it opened up a little with infection after my first surgery.

The most important message here, is to make certain your Surgeon is on the same page, that they know exactly what YOU want. Take pictures of flat surgeries that you find on breastfree.org, Flat & Fabulous, even the Scar Project etc. Tell them you know others who have made this decision and are extremely happy, with their results. I know it seems outrageous that you have to go to all this trouble, simply to get your decision across, but if that's what it takes!

Jerseygirl, You have first hand experience of how women feel about both sides of the decision to reconstruct, or not. So you have probably "heard it all".

I have mentioned this here before. I am in Australia and I believe the numbers to be different in the US and Canada. Of the 200 Mx surgeries my Surgeon had performed, in the 2 years he had been in this country, prior to my surgery, only 2 women reconstructed. He told me that women here, are much more relaxed, about refusing reconstruction. He was trained and practiced in South Africa and then, had a practice for years, in London. He also set up Breast Clinics for women, in both places.

I also belong to a support group and although some had Lx surgery of the many who had Umx and BMx, only 1 of those ladies reconstructed and that was done many years down the track, because she wanted to have a lift, on her remaining side, so she went with recon of her Umx side and is very happy with the results.

It would be interesting, to see the figures for both sides of the reconstruction decision, for each of our countries.

Nomatterwhat, that's just ridiculous. I really feel for you. I would be furious beyond words. How dare that stupid woman, ask you to do a Testimonial Video! Shame you couldn't have really done a testimonial and given her a verbal serve, that she wouldn't forget in a hurry. Do you have any recourse at all? There should be something you can do, if nothing else, she should be finding a surgeon that can "do the flat look"and I'd make sure she is well aware, that it is only necessary, because of her incompetence. I hope her Nurse, relays every word you said to her.

All I can say, is they better start practicing the "Flat Look" and getting it right, because there are a lot of us, taking that road!

I wish you all the best in finding an understanding and skilled surgeon that can wipe that disappointment away and give you a nice, flat chest, that you are comfortable and happy with.

on Thursday I had drainage of my surgery sight, this is the second one, I have refilled and because I didnnt want the seranoma to harden I had it don, well this dr who did the drainage took out 4 syringfull of fluid, we talked about why my scar is irregular with a bit if a fatty pocket in the center of my chest on the left side. She explained that the don t take the fat from the sides, under the arms, cause they can't really get to it while you are under sedation, you can't be moved or rolled because of complications etc, so you are usually left with fat pockets under arm, plus fluid buildup till after chemo. Because you are getting extra fluids then. So unless the surgeon can get a good position and is tall to see it all, you will be stuck with a drooping scar or some type of flap. My scar is straigh, but goes downward, it is not symmetrical nor pretty. Luckily only two or three people will ever see it, but it's definately not even or nice looking. Oh well

Hi Katy! I am so sorry you have a different result than you expected. Unfortunately it happens all too often, for many different reasons. I was actually very happy with my scar, it was straight, flat and fine, till an infection opened up part of it, which ruined the fine straight line. I also had a zapping, zinging, numb, pouffy shelf, under my right arm which I hated. I put up with it for a long time, because, like most women, I didn't want another surgery. After about 15 months, I had convinced myself that it wasn't really getting any better, so I approached my Surgeon to revise it.

Although my surgeon told me it was rare for women to revise these pouffy things, it really isn't a difficult procedure. He would have preferred to do it in Hospital, but I convinced him to do it with a local anesthetic, in his rooms with his Nurse. It worked out really well and I am so pleased I did it. In saying this, I doubt I would have followed through with this revision, if I hadn't had the constant irritation, of the cut nerve sensation, it has gone from about an 8 to a 1 on the "irritation" scale! Unless I actually lean back on something, I barely notice it, any more.

If you'd like to see pics, you can see the before and after shots, on breastfree.org. The difference is quite astonishing, in both the way it feels and the way it looks. It is about a year since I had the revision done and the scar is almost invisible now.

This isn't something that you need to consider, just know, that these "leftovers" are something that can be improved on, should you ever, want, to do it. For me, sometimes, just knowing that I can do something, if I choose to, makes it easier to put up with the issue!

I wish you all the best, feel free, to ask anything.

UGH, Katy,, that is a long drive to a therapist!  Still it would be good for you to go for an initial eval and some MLD training. Maybe it could be a fun overnight trip with some shopping too???

I feel you with the mound in the middle. I've got that, and more, thanks to my BS who "thought" I was having recon.  I had appt with PS to get it removed but then I developed truncal LE and I put it on hold for the moment. I would still like to be flat, though, so maybe in the future.  And you had BMX,,, and there are some women on here who did develop LE on the prophy side,, sad to say,,, I hope that is not your case and you are "just" still having some post op nerve tingling/regrowth???   Ariom has given you good advice,, and I might suggest that you look up the thread "Bonfire of the Goddesses"   GmaFoley over there had a breast reduction (not the same as yours I know) to reduce her shoulder pain, and the ladies over there have a wealth of experience.  And they are a fun crazy bunch to hang out with too!  Also, read around on the lymphedema forum,, and maybe start your own question thread. There are some knowledgable ladies over there, Binney and Carol, come to mind immediately.  They have been a BIG help to me.

Katy, the way I understand it, lE can begin with any kind of trauma. I only had one node removed too, but the residual discomfort that I have pretty much all stems from that. I had the zapping and zinging nerve pain inside the dog ear, but the swelling, like a lemon under my arm and the numbness which still extends down the back of my arm, was all node involved. I have been assured that even though I still have what feels like swelling to me, that I don't have LE.

When it comes to the zinging and zapping and burning sensations that you have on both sides, they are normal for this kind of surgery. I actually watched a Mx being performed on You Tube, months after my surgery, to try to understand why I still had all these weird sensations going one. Believe me, it isn't for everyone, but I tell you, that surgery is brutal and it absolutely, gave me more insight into the weirdness of the residual discomfort. The nerves continue to grow for around a year or so and everything was scraped off, so no wonder it's sore and uncomfortable for a long time.

In the grand scheme of things, it is still, very early days, for you. There are all kinds of weird sensations which will come and go, for a while yet and you'll possibly have some that hang around, like mine, for a bit longer. It is just the way it is.

I agree with Glennie, if you can have the possibility of LE looked at and assessed, that would be a good idea, even just for a baseline for the future. You may not have LE at all.

I found massage and stretching exercises were really beneficial for me.too. I did them religiously, 4 x each day for the longest time and I still massage every day, more from habit now, but I didn't want to risk adhesions.

I hope you won't feel so alone now. We do really understand what you're going through and are around if you want to vent, or chat, about how you're doing.

Take it easy and be kind to yourself. Your body has been through a brutal experience and the healing will be going on for some time yet. Let us know how you're getting on!