"At least you caught it early"

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  • LucyPug
    LucyPug Member Posts: 7
    edited December 2014

    The most hurtful response was "why are you doing this to me". And after my mastectomy, "well who is going to want to look at you now". Oh and, "don't tell me about your cancer, I don't need to know". To bad it was my DM that said those things and can't handle the truth. I'll need therapy as well.



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  • Chloesmom
    Chloesmom Member Posts: 1,053
    edited December 2014

    Lucy when I told a relative my grandmother had cancer she said. " I don't want to hear this as I have enough to deal with in my own life". All I could do was feel pity that people like this have such issues of their own that they have no room for sensitivity for others. I feel sorry that they are so ill in other ways. It's really hard to let it go sometimes when we try to process illogical things logically.

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  • LucyPug
    LucyPug Member Posts: 7
    edited December 2014

    Thanks chloesmom for your words of wisdom. I do look at things logically and from my perspective. It's good to have someone remind us that not everyone can express themselves the way we want them to. It's nice to know that there are caring thoughts here on these boards

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  • glennie19
    glennie19 Member Posts: 6,398
    edited December 2014

    People can be so insensitive. I am constantly amazed at the dumb things some people say.

    I'm still stunned that your neighbor asked you for your bras, Chloesmom! Wow,,, smack in the head for her!

    LucyPug, I'm sorry that you have to hear such hurtful things from your DM.   Some people are just so caught up in themselves that they really don't think about others. 

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  • jannymarie
    jannymarie Member Posts: 1
    edited December 2014

    I am glad I found this board [thanks to my daughter]. I have had all those things said to me and the latest was the "cancer eats sugar" when I mentioned having a craving for candy this Christmastime. The thing 99% of people say to me is: " you are so strong, you will beat this." I just smile and think about what they mean. If I whine about a mastectomy, then I am not strong? If I mention being sick to my stomach after medications, am I a big baby? Trying to keep a sense of humor but my husband is now running my store because of all the well meaning comments from everyone. I did have to laugh about what "cholesmom" said about her neighbor asking about her now useless bras. That woman must have brass balls. It is hard to fathom how people can be so heartless.

    jannymarie first post


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  • Chloesmom
    Chloesmom Member Posts: 1,053
    edited December 2014

    She wouldn't have gotten them even if they WERE her size. I'm looking for one of those places that outfits needy women trying to interview for jobs. Have a bunch of almost new bras and tops that won't go with my "new look". I just had to laugh inside and think REALLY?!?! Your really asked that question?

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  • glennie19
    glennie19 Member Posts: 6,398
    edited December 2014


    Chloesmom, that would be a great place to donate them. Down here, we have a place called Peaceful Paths which helps women escape abusive situations and helps them with housing and jobs.  I'm sure there is such an organization in your area.

    Jannymarie, welcome to the club that you never wanted to join. People say all kinds of stupid, mean things. And you are definitely not a baby if you are sick to your stomach after chemo, etc!!  Feel free to whine over here. We all "get" you!

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