KCA - 5 years out!

When I was first diagnosed 5 years ago, I was terrified. My daughters were only 10 and 8, and I remember fervently wishing I would be anything but Stage IV.  Well I got my wish.  I was stage IIIC with vascular invasion, a inter mammary node that could only be radiated and a tumor that had escaped detection due to my dense breasts along with a possible defective gene.  I honestly thought I would never make it this far.   

Everyday, the "cancer radio" was playing in the background with the message of doom.  I only made it through those dark days with the help of the women on this board and short term use of anti-anxiety meds.  I also met two other women who were diagnosed the same week - Karen (triple neg from UK) and Ann Silberman of "But Doctor I hate pink" fame.  We became KCA  for Kicking Cancer's Ass and our initials.  We all thought Ann had the best chances of survival.  After all, she was Stage II.  It just shows how random this disease is and how little we know. I continue to be frustrated by the lack of funding for Stage IV research.

I am under no illusions that I am "cured", but I am grateful for each day.  I'm excited when my daughters reach milestones and become more independent.

If you are a newbie, here are my tips for getting through the dark times.  Doctors do not do a good job of explaining the side effects of steroids.  It is different for everyone, but they can worsen your anxiety and cause horrible mood swings.   I begged my onc to lower the dose and she did agree. I used anti-anxiety meds while I was on steroids to help counteract the worst side effects. Stay away from Dr. Google.  Much of the information is outdated and just plain scary.  This board was my lifeline.  You will find a group of women who truly understand what you are experiencing.  Don't hesitate to post when you are feeling down.  We want to help.  Read the 5 years out stories.  I'm forever grateful for the women who share their stories and give us all hope.