SEX!!!

The truth is most marriages go through a dry spell. If you add on all of the physical and mental issues, children, and a lack of alone time that is going to equal a lack of sex. First off you need to talk to your dh and communicate how you are feeling. Hopefully your marriage is built on more than just sex and that both of you can talk and figure out how to manage this lull. There have been times where sex was the last thing on my mind, so I had to make a huge effort to make myself just do it. Once I got involved it took on a life of it's own. Maybe try wearing a cute lacy camisole, turn down the lights, and light some candles. Maybe try sharing a soapy shower and see if that kick starts something. Have you talked to a Dr.? Sorry if I'm not much help. Take care!

I don't actively want it anymore, and I attribute chemopause to that change. Perhaps it's also feeling like there are so many critical issues, I'm not as carefree.  Nevertheless, I work at it. I keep up my end of my relationship.  I always feel better participating, even if I have to sort of trick myself into it. My PT and I decided it's a bit like exercise for some of us.  You dread it, but feel great afterwards. Make a date with yourself, and if you want, with your partner, too.  Make it a priority.

thanks for adding that ltothek! I needed that.   

Tangandchris, and all,

You may be perfect candidates to ask your questions and for advice from Breastcancer.org's new Sex Matters Blog with Dr. Michael Krychman, where the doctor will answer questions on a monthly basis and offer his expertise.

Also, Dr. Krychman recently recorded a podcast with Breastcancer.org called Sexuality and Breast Cancer: From Diagnosis to Survivorship, where a variety of similar topics are discussed. 

We hope this helps!

--The Mods

Badger Rotflol. You told me that you'd be wearing the "Five O'clock Somewhere" hat I gave you on margaretta night. New it was your date night. Not sure I remember it was connected with the "get lucky" night. sassy

TAng , there's a plan here. Date night, a drink, a hat with nothing else, and  a song. Works for Badger. . I prefer the sudden be ready for anything mode. lol. Hey I had a a couple decade hiatus. 

I think you will start to feel more interested the farther you get away from the surgeries and treatments. I think it does take a little work.  We've lost some of our erogenous zones, and some of us our hormones.  You may not have any interest until you start, and it may be a little different experience that you'll have to experiment with.  Don't get frustrated and don't give up hope.  The experts recommend just what your sisters here have recommended - Just do it.  Plan a time on the calendar even if you can't do a full blown date night.  But you have to plan it because if you don't, it doesn't happen, and as you note, you have another encumbrance with the little one hogging your bed.  I've been in that boat several years ago so I sympathize and know that you have to be creative.     How about a Saturday or Sunday morning or early afternoon when you're both rested?