Family issues after Breast cancer

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janbp78
janbp78 Member Posts: 2
edited June 2014 in Hormonal Therapy - Before, During, and After
Family issues after Breast cancer
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  • janbp78
    janbp78 Member Posts: 2
    edited May 2014

    Hi there I am new to this, and I'm desperate! I had my 1st op (lumpectomy) in Nov 2011, chemo a week before Xmas, mastectomy May 2012, Radiotherapy July and on Tamoxifen after! Before chemo I explained to my oncologist that wanting more children was very important to my husband and I, I asked about freezing my eggs he said it wasn't done in Ireland! I was offered no alternatives, told I'm 'young' and I should be able to try after. He also said 'I was lucky to have one child already!' Which was like a slap in the face. Yesterday I went to him! I've literally been ticking off the days to try get back to normal! He was very negative and asked if I have started my periods! Which I haven't! I'm 36 this year! I was diagnosed at 33! He said from an 'oncologist point of view' he hopes I never have my periods again, so that I never have that chance of cancer returning! I had a lump nearly 6cm's and 2 nodes were positive! Oestrogen positive! I am devastated! I feel so let down! I trusted him! I feel like I have no hope now! I am heartbroken :( please can anyone offer any information, I really need it x thank you

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  • pajim
    pajim Member Posts: 2,785
    edited May 2014

    Hi janbp78,  chemo does stop some womens' periods permanently.  Some women restart their periods.  It really varies from person to person.  it's possible that your ovaries will start functioning again, though after two years I don't know. 

    You did need chemo, though, to reduce your risk of recurrence.  Once you have positive nodes, the risk goes up.  There are little "hard" data on whether suppressing the ovaries reduces the recurrence risk as well, but most oncologists believe it does.  (on the estrogen-fueling theory)

    What I'm appalled at is that he didn't explain this to you before chemotherapy.  You told him what your issues were and he should have worked with you or you should have found another doctor.  Is the medical establishment in Ireland so paternalistic?  At this point if you don't trust him you need to find another doctor to see. 

    This is water under the bridge if your ovaries don't start working again.  And I'm really sorry that they haven't as you wish it so much.  I'm not trying to make light of your wish to bear more children, but could you look at some alternatives?  Adoption? 

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  • rgiuff
    rgiuff Member Posts: 1,094
    edited June 2014

      It is possible that your periods could come back after stopping tamoxifen, as this drug sometimes keeps periods suppressed.  And many women do 2 or 3 years of it, then come off of it to try to get pregnant, with their oncologist's blessing.  They then resume taking it after pregnancy/breastfeeding.  

    If your Oncologist isn't supportive of this idea, you may want to find another who would be.  After all, we survive cancer so that we can live our lives. If this is an important life goal for you, then you have the right to try to pursue it!

    There is a group on here called "Coming off tamoxifen early to have a baby" that you should check out. Many of the women there are in a similar situation to you.

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  • peggy_j
    peggy_j Member Posts: 1,700
    edited June 2014

    I'm sorry to hear this and it sounds like your MO's "bedside" manner isn't great either. 

    I didn't have this concern, but I once saw this book at the library and only briefly flipped through it.

    http://www.amazon.com/Having-Children-After-Cancer...

    here's info from the Komen website

    http://ww5.komen.org/BreastCancer/PregnancyAfterBr...

    I agree with the suggestion to get a second opinion and to try to find support groups (online or in person). 

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