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Chrisesta67
Chrisesta67 Member Posts: 46
edited June 2014 in Acknowledging and honoring our Community

Hello; I'm a 46 year old single woman taking time now to reflect on my breast cancer treatment journey of the past year. A diagnosis of ductal carcinoma in situ and intra-ductal carcinoma came in early March of last year. Multi-centric cancer - 3 tumor locations in the right breast -meant that a mastectomy was necessary. Amazingly, although a breast cancer gene mutation exists in my family, I've tested negative for the mutation. Due to the presence of a tiny bit of cancer in the sentinel lymphnode, I've had TC chemotherapy (completed last July) and 33 radiation treatments (completed at the end of October). Since I opted not to have immediate reconstruction of my right breast, I'm now looking into prosthetic breast forms and researching options for future reconstruction. 

I want to share my feelings of gratitude and appreciation for the terrific healthcare team that guided me through the stages of diagnosis and treatment. Everyone  who played a role in my journey was compassionate, knowledgeable, and patient with me. The NP who monitored my chemotherapy experience was especially kind and attentive. And radiation, which I think I feared the most, did not manifest in the terrible burns and pain I had anticipated. At every difficult point, a doctor, nurse, technician, social worker, or admin support person was there to calm my anxieties and help me rally my inner strength to move forward. The past year was certainly a challenge - with its high and low points - but not the nightmare I envisioned as I listened to the diagnosis for the first time. Also, this experience has offered an inroad to becoming closer to some members of my family (my mother, an aunt whose own journey through TC chemo for breast cancer unfolded just ahead of my own, and cousins). It's interesting -kind of on the edge of sweetness - the way a heartbreak can be an opportunity to revisit and repair old chasms in relationships. 

I just wanted to take a moment on this forum, which has been a welcome source of support and information for me, to express my gratitude for having been shown that a gentler side to a breast cancer diagnosis can exist alongside the pain, fatigue, and worry. I'm not the same person I was before the cancer diagnosis. Among other things, my hair is a lot thinner and I don't have a right breast anymore. But I do have my family and a renewed passion for making the most out of life. 

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  • LivingLovingLaughing
    LivingLovingLaughing Member Posts: 4
    edited February 2014

    Thank you for your post - even though it was a year ago I must say that it was beautiful.  My cancer experience, similar to your own was in 1996 and then in 2006, DCIS.  It was caught early both times and I will not go into the details of the first time but suffice as to say I felt confident that for me a mastectomy was the only way for me to go.  So when I got it again in 2006 I knew what to expect and what to do. When I initially heard the "cancer" diagnosis in 1996 I fell apart, I was terrified, I had young children and I thought I was going to die.  I am someone who feels that knowledge is power and the more I knew the more I felt in charge of my treatment and care.  I decided to move my treatment and care to a bigger, well-known hospital in NYC and although I may not have received the same TLC that I got in the small hospital I felt very confident that the doctors (specialists in BC), knew what they were doing.  I had an excellent plastic surgeon who performed immediate reconstruction.  The whole experience has changed my life for the better.  I am present today.  I left a marriage that was no longer meeting my needs - we are friends and have both re-married.  I have raised my two girls to be confident, empowered young women and they value me highly.  I have chosen to follow a path of self-love and care and hopefully health.  I slip here and there and I am very forgiving of myself.  Life has taken it's turns and I try to go with the flow.  I see life from a totally different perspective and I feel so grateful that I have allowed the experience to give me insight into the cherished gift of knowing how precious each day is.  Cancer is no longer a death sentence, it is, however, a life sentence and only those that have experience it can understand and embrace the gift of "knowing".

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  • Chrisesta67
    Chrisesta67 Member Posts: 46
    edited February 2014

    Hi! Thank you for responding to my post and for sharing a bit about your own experiences. I admire your proactive approach through the initial diagnosis and the recurrence. Your daughters are fortunate to have you as a role model. 

    At the end of this month, I'll have my first mammogram since the diagnosis last March. I have a feeling this once routine procedure is going to take on a whole new emotional significance. It will be nice to see my surgeon again. I hope she'll see how much I've tried to take care of my mastectomy scar!  :-) 

    Thank you again, LivingLovingLaughing... a nice screen name for a nice person. Be well.

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  • FrannyM424
    FrannyM424 Member Posts: 55
    edited February 2014

    Ladies thank you for your beautiful posts!  What an inspiration.  I can hardly wait to see how I feel one year out from all of this.  But I can already tell how much I've grown since diagnosis Dec 2013, lumpectomy Jan 2014 and re-excision lumpectomy Feb 4th.  Unfortunately I have to have a right mastectomy March 5th but I'll make it though that as well.  I never knew how much my family and friends truly loved me until this experience.  Two wonderful things to share.  I recently apologized to my husband for being clingy and needy at times and his response was "I've waited over 20 years for you to need me like this."  And just this past Sunday, my 16yo son Nick reached over and grabbed my hand during Mass and held it throughout the entire homily.  And then after Mass he used his own money to light a candle for my upcoming surgery.  How sweet is that?  Just when you think you couldn't be prouder or love your family anymore...

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited February 2014

    Chrisesta67

    Thank you so much for your beautiful and thoughtful post.  We are so glad you found this community and we are confident you will make the most out of life. 

    Best wishes, 

    The Mods

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