In shock
Comments
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momof2....enjoy your family and pets today! So glad to hear your onco is working "for" you, not just seeing you as another appointment. I know how hard it is at this point to consider the mx surgery, especially if the lumpx went well for you, and maybe was "minimally" deforming. I strongly, strongly urge you to re-consider a consult with a PS though. As hard as it is, you will serve yourself best by getting as much info as you can, because there are options out there for you. Even if you go with no recon....and that does work for many ladies...nothing wrong in that approach...if you are a "difficult" healer (thick, ropey scars), a PS has better skills/techniques for minimizing that for you. Any surgery will leave scars....but there are good scars and there are "bad scars". Are you aware that skinsparing mx's can be done? Even nipplesparing mx??? You owe it to yourself to understand all your options. Enjoy today...Oregon isn't going anywhere!
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Dear Momof3,
So sorry to hear your news. I was 'off the air' yesterday, and only read here this morning. All of us can identify, because we all have that black dog on our tails for the rest of our lives. I can well imagine that you are shocked and devastated at the moment. However, I want to add my voice to Nihahi's re: reconstruction surgery.
Can only speak to my own experience, and maybe it can help you. I had to get a mastectomy right out the gate because of the position of the tumour. They could not save my breast, and I had no choice. Although it was a crazy whirlwind of tests, scans and appointments in the beginning of 2012 (was diagnosed with endometrial ca simultaneously), I also saw a very good PS before any surgery was done. She took the time to explain to me exactly what my options were, and what she recommended. I had enough time to think about everything, and settled on MX with placement of a tissue expander to hold the skin pocket in case I decided on recon later. Was not sure that I wanted it at all. MX was in Feb. 7, 2012. Went through chemo and rads with the expander in place, and decided in November 2012 to do DIEP flap reconstruction which was done in May this year.
When I was newly diagnosed, I was too confused, and it was so overwhelming that I could not make an educated decision about recon. This is where you are now. I am not sorry that I gave myself the opportunity for recon, because eventually that was what I decided to do. Nihahi is right that PS's are more skilled than general surgeons. They are specifically trained to do very delicate surgeries, and it is their pride that there be as little scarring as possible.
You will be fine for your DS's wedding in May, don't worry. I was going through rads when my DD got married last July, was completely bald, had neither eyelashes nor eyebrows, and was still very fatigued after two major surgeries, chemo, and rads. So I got myself a cute, sassy wig, a smashing purple outfit, and had a make-up person do her magic on the wedding day. Then I went out, and celebrated my child's marriage and her happiness with gusto. You will do the same, I'm sure. BIG HUGS to you!!!!
Raining, raining, raining here. Sad that summer is over, but it was a good, long one and we can't complain. DH just hooked up the trailer to go and take the motorboat out of the water. In our house that signals the end of the waterskiing season, and the end of summer. He took his last two ski runs on Wednesday and Thursday. Water is so cold already - don't know how he gets into that icy water without a wetsuit. The laughing neighbour yelled at him Thursday afternoon when he realized that DH was really going to ski, 'Man, you've really got b-lls!" LOL. Treadclimber is arriving on Tuesday afternoon, so there will be no excuse not to exercise. I will start at one mile per hour . . .
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Momof2, sorry to hear that your biopsy came back positive, and that you have go through the process again.
I'm in the middle of finding out about recon now. I had a lumpectomy, but because of the pattern of lesions (10 low grade ones in the lumpectomy), the rad onc says there isn't good data to show effectiveness of radiation. So, I'm 90% sure I'm going to do a bi lat mast and recon. I have it to wait for the oncotype and a review of the pathology before I make the final decision. In any case, whatever you decide on recon will be the right decision for you, but agree with the others that I would encourage you to check out your options.
Glad to hear you are able to get into your surgeon on Monday. The waiting part of this process is, as I know you know, such a grind.
It's a glorious day here. Was out for breakfast with my walking group. We do a 60 km walk for the main cancer hospital here each year, and three out of 12 of us are now breast cancer survivors, so it's been a really great support group for me. A few of us did a walk after - only an hour today, but the leaves are starting to turn, and it was so pretty. Another friend and I are heading out to one of the national parks here tomorrow morning, for a couple of hours, which will be heavenly. Most of the walk is in the woods, which is my favourite part.
Hope everyone is having a good day. Love the phrases, I'm picking up on this thread - caravans, and flags cracking! Who knew?
Ridley -
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Hi gorgeous girls.
Sun cracking those flags again here lol.
Been for a lovely walk along the promenade at Hoylake, sat soaking up the vitamin D while watching lots of little sailing boats being put through their paces on the boating lake.
Had portion of fries, then ice cream for pudding yum yum.
Did weeks grocery shopping and looking forward to big dinner with lots of gravy later.Yesterday, spent the day on my BC telephone buddies training course. So interesting and met other survivors who want to give something back.
We are due to start up soon. It is aimed at ladies who have no one they feel able to talk to or who just need to know what happens on this journey.Not everyone can get out to meetings and they think this may be the ideal answer.
They already run ones for other types of cancer all manned by fellow sufferers. They are really helping there so fingers crossed.Just had a super Skype with Liefie
anyone else who has Skype feel free to pm me with your details if you want a face to face natter.
DH just mowed front and back lawns now chomping on a choc ice. I am just finishing holiday laundry and new series of Downton Abbey on tv later.Ridley, I too have learnt a new set of words on here, restroom/fries/cookies all mean something different here.
Have you more treatment to come ? The excercise you are having will build you up. I am finding I feel more and more " normal " after pounding the pavements/sidewalks.Mom, keep that chin up, you are a brave lady and will beat the bxxxh again. ((( HUG )))
My poor old brain feels bit mangled today after concentrating yesterday, need a lie down in a darkened room ha ha.
Love to all xx
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Hi Scouser, I'm so jealous that you get to watch the new season of Dowton Abbey already. We have to wait until January!
I have either chemo + hormone or just hormone therapy to come (waiting for oncotype) and radiation or more surgery (waiting for pathology review). It's looking like more surgery and hormone therapy, but will know (I hope) by mid October.
Was in the woods with a friend for a couple of hours this morning. It was fantastic out. Now I'm off to do laundry and some work, and then out for dinner for my Aunt's birthday. She is my Mom's youngest sister, and was diagnosed with breast cancer earlier this Spring, so we are sort of going through this together. Something fun to share -- not! -
Ridley, that is defo NOT fun to share. At least you can support each other. Hope birthday dinner was fun anyway.
Gosh hope you do find out soon what next step is. The waiting is just about the worst part of all this sxxt.
Just reminded me to bring in MY laundry thank you. X -
Hi girls,
Edi, thanks so much for the lovely cyber visit this morning- so much better to see somebody face to face. Had so little sleep last night because DH did ER call. Phone started ringing at two, and by four he left for the hospital. Normally I sleep through all this, but not last night. At four this morning I was having tea in the kitchen, and had the time of my life to stay awake in church - almost fell out of the pew a few times. Should have stayed home. LOL. Made squash soup for lunch, walked the dog in the rain, now lying on my back on the couch. DH pottering outside, and leaving me alone. He is also like a zombie, and we will crash early tonight.
Ridley, sorry to hear about your aunt. No, it's not fun, but at least you can support each other through this. Praying that you won't need chemo. Best wishes!
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In shock topic, hl everyone, miss this forum, where did you go?
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Hi, i miss all of you, from forum topic in shock. Whete did you go?
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Hi lizylu....this thread is a quiet one these days, as many of the earlier members seem to have drifted away. Weekends tend to be quiet too. Though likely you have found us for reasons none of us ever want to have, perhaps if you shared a bit about yourself, it would get a conversation going, too. Hope things are going well for you, wherever you are on this "path".
liefie...sheesh....honestly, I think I would have stayed home and rested....can you even remember the sermon???? Hope you weren't playing the organ today
.Edi...glad you're home safe and sound. The phone buddy thing sounds good....but I do hope you go back to the hospital volunteer thing too. So many people could benefit from your smile and caring heart, without the "cancer connection". How are the tingly feelings in your hands doing????
momof2.....hope you had a good visit with your daugher and sil....
dakota, maria...any progress on your "tough issues"????? thinking of you lots.
traii...missing you...hope you are doing ok, and just busy.....
have a good night ladies.
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Howdy all
It's been a quite week here. No new updates yet. I'm going to the dentist tomorrow and I'm dreading it, so over appointments but figure I better go before we lose our insurance, eye doctor will be on Friday.
Good news my hair and eyelashes are starting to grow, can't wait to see what it's going to look like.
I don't post every day but I do look forward to reading all of your post, they make me smile so I hope this thread doesn't fade away -
Mom - with you also
Ridley - hoping also that you won't need chemo
I'm a bit numb today - yesterday morning got the phone call that Mom had fallen again and was being transported to hospital. My DH is in LA for five days, left Thursday evening. At the hospital she was on life support and prognosis not good - huge intracerebral hemorrhage. They took her off the ventilator at 2 yesterday afternoon and she passed at 3:45 this a.m. Lots to do but not able to do it right now. Hospital staff were wonderful.
I like the inspirational poster Edi
Hugs to everyone -
Websister....so sorry to hear this news. Losing a parent is something we all endure, but are never truly prepared for, regardless of the circumstances. It is obvious that you have a strong faith, and in time, you will be comforted by it, but at the moment you likely just feel the sense of loss, and a numbing grief. Certainly there is NO doubt that you have been a loving, caring, and thoughtful daughter, and I'm sure your mother appreciated all you did for her. This is truly a time that brings out the best, in the best of families....my condelences to you and your family at this loss.
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I was going to jump on and read, then post later......but Websister........your sad news meant I needed to stay for a moment and respond......
So very sorry that your Mom is gone......I think even if our parents are old, and we know they will not be around forever, that losing them, no matter the reason, is terribly hard. I wish I was there, I would put my arms around you and give you a big (((hug))) and say let your faith carry you.......I am not very good with words, but I agree with everything Nihahi said......
Just know we love you, and we care. XO -
Websister I am so sorry to hear about mom. Huge hugs !!!
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Well said Nihahi - lovely words for websister who definitely needs all of our thoughts, prayers and hugs.
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Websister -- I am very sorry to hear about your Mom as well. I hope your DH is back soon from his trip to LA, so he can be there with you during this tough period.
Thank you for the "no-chemo" wishes.
Ridley
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Websister...deeply sorry to hear about your Mom. It is hard to lose a parent no matter how old we are. My thoughts are with you
Maria... I get so mad when I hear about what insurance does to add to the pile of stress we are already under. I will not say more, for fear of getting on my "soap box". Hoping for strong teeth and eyes!!
Ridley... Crossing my fingers for a low onco score and no chemo!
I will be seeing my general surgeon late this afternoon and see what type of carving he wants to recommend. DH already googled MX pictures and I saw tears in his eyes. I have not looked at pictures, but I will follow your advise and ask about a PS and some type of reconstruction. I have been here before, but the anxiety and desire to get this cancer cut out sometimes clouds my ability to think rationally.
Sending love and hugs to all on this thread. I am so grateful to have you as my support.
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momof2....(((((((((X)))))))))) and for hubby too!
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Dear Websister, so very sorry to hear this unexpected bad news! Got an e-mail from Nihahi to tell me about this, because I've not been on here today so far. You have just settled her into that care facility, and everything was going so well . . . you just never know what tomorrow will bring, eh? Hope DH will be on his way home soon. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers, and may you all find peace. It is going to be a whirlwind of arrangements these next few days - BIG HUGS to you, my dear friend!
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Websister, I'm so sorry about your mommy. I hope your DH gets home soon to hug and comfort you. I am sending prayers and cyber hugs your way.
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Websister, so sorry to hear about your wonderful Mom. May your memories bring you comfort. You were so good to her.
Condolences to you and all your family. Hope DH gets to your side very soon. ((( HUGS ))) X -
Oh Websister, so sorry to hear about your mom.
My deepest sympathy and condolences to u and your gorgeous family.
you are all in my thoughts ♥♥ -
Traii...so good to hear from you.
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♥ Nihahi.
I do read everyday. Been busy. Got keys to our new townhouse we bought as an investment. Running around with real estate people and organising to go back to work. Life is busy and I love it. -
Websister, so sad to hear your news. I too have lost a parent. It's so tough. We know they are in a better place, but we miss them so much. Prayers going out for your whole family.
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Just popped in after too long... to say Hello to some friends..
Hello! Good to see you guys still here.
Websister I was so sad to read your news that you had lost your Mum. Thinking of you and sending LOVE.
Scouser - sounds like a perfect gig for you XX
I've just done some art therapy today. It was really good. I feel like I kind of got something out...??? Probabley wont be hanging the pics on the wall though LOL!
Sending LOVE to all you wonderful ladies xXx
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Websister,
So sorry to hear about your mom. Thinking of you during this difficult time. Hope your hubby can cut his trip short and get home to you.
We had same type of situation a few years ago and wrote to airlines and they gave us a half price discount on ticket. Sent copy of obituary and didn't hear back for about a month then one day a check came in the mail for half the price of the airline ticket. -
Bevlee...So wonderful to "hear" from you! Hope things are well with you and life is moving on. Art Therapy....sounds neat...anyway you can get the difficult feelings out is good....makes more room inside for the positive ones. Hope you come back and visit us more often.
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