Boyfriend break up after mastectomy

Options
13»

Comments

  • lilithmoon
    lilithmoon Member Posts: 177
    edited April 2013

    I was feeling really low, so I decided to go out to my favorite club and I met someone really nice - we danced together and it was kind of sizzly.  He gave me his card and a big hug and said he'd like to see me again. I actually met him a year ago but was still with my ex.  At the time, I thought he was very sweet.  Anyway, not sure how to proceed.  The cancer/boob thing makes things a little confusing.  This guy has a really good reputation in the community - I don't think he's a narcissist.  Wish me luck : )

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Myleftboob
    Myleftboob Member Posts: 1,469
    edited March 2013

    Jocelyn

    Sounds like fun and yes good luck!

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • softness1
    softness1 Member Posts: 217
    edited March 2013

    Jocelyn,!!!!

    That sounds so exciting.. Good luck and have fun

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • lilithmoon
    lilithmoon Member Posts: 177
    edited April 2013

    Thanks so much for your support!!  I don't think most people understand how vulnerable we can feel back out on the dating circuit.  If this guy can deal, then he's a gem and worthy of my time and energy.  Not like the ex - I put out so much energy for that guy and... for nothing!!!

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Myleftboob
    Myleftboob Member Posts: 1,469
    edited March 2013

    Talk about a test of if how stand up a guy is?  Like you said, if he can deal, he's a keeper.  If he can't, time won't be wasted!  I kind of like this!!

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • softness1
    softness1 Member Posts: 217
    edited March 2013

    I'm just loving Jocelyne confidence to get back out there. I'm so self conscious of everything. My shedding hair, painful implants. I love how she shrugged oh well I'm going out. You go girl!!!! Regardless of what happens with the guy. We know she's brave. I sit in my bed playing Sims on my laptop.. Not afraid. Just don't wanna be bothered. But I do think this is cute

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • lilithmoon
    lilithmoon Member Posts: 177
    edited April 2013

    I too feel self-conscious about my body.  I asked my mom and brother when they thought it would be a good time to reveal  the cancer/boob thing - they both had so many answers it made my head swim.  I wish I could just get it out the way but I think they're might be an artful way to do it (just when he's taking off my clothes?) no, I don't think so. I have so many residual insecurities from my ex, but I want to move forward.  It would be so easy to withdraw and say forget it but the opportunity presented itself!

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • Myleftboob
    Myleftboob Member Posts: 1,469
    edited March 2013

    Jocelyn

    For me I would rather talk about it first before hitting the sheets LOL!  I can't imagine how further damaging it would be to my ego having a guy like totally recoil at the majic moment you know?

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • lilithmoon
    lilithmoon Member Posts: 177
    edited March 2013

    yes absolutely, I don't even want to imagine it.  I suppose there will be a right moment - when I feel safe enough.  He'll have to earn my honesty though.  But usually, I am such a pushover and I tend to move on things too quickly.  This will require more maturity of me -- which is a good thing

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • softness1
    softness1 Member Posts: 217
    edited March 2013

    My cousin is my best friend and is so sarcastic, jaded and nonsensical about situations. Very frank. Think actress/comedienne Janeane Garofalo.... So I'm going on about my reconstruction and being self conscious. She goes " Oh plse Ann, my husband hasn't seen my breast since mid 90's, in a few months after healing you will be ok. Mine are going to still be a mess". Lmao



    Lol. So I'm shocked she goes on to tell me after 5 kids her breast are a mess. Stretch marks, saggy, flat etc....So during intimate times her girls are beautifully dressed and propped up in a great bra to look good... Then she says (it was way tmi so I will edit) " If you had a fake vagina you would have a problem, but look at TV. All the stars have fake breast and fake hair, they are now your peers. Your fav male celeb has probably dealt with more fake breasts than real so stop!!!!"



    I could only stop crying and laugh because she was serious...so now I'm obsessed with watching the stars. It's funny. Yeah theirs were choice & they probably have better end results. Not all of them. I've seen imperfections. But like my cousin said they dress them up. I'm nervous but her advice made me feel better. And her delivery. Priceless.



    Ann.

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter
  • lilithmoon
    lilithmoon Member Posts: 177
    edited April 2013

    yeah I would have never imagined having a boob job.  I make a lot of jokes about it and get excited when I go to the clothing store knowing that I'll be able to wear clothes I couldn't wear before with my saggy boobs.  It's good to look on the bright side. 

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter

Categories