Do I feel worse around the holidays?
I don't know if its the holidays or what but I keep feeling like I'm not going to make it through this. WTH? Urgggggg. I wish this disease didn't exist. 2 months into year 2 after active treatment, I don't have time for this sh@t!! Sigh..... I hope all of you had a great holiday!!
Comments
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Yeah...The holidays are hard..especially so early in the game. We actually have the EXACT diagnosis...( left breast for me/diagnosed at 36)...I am 3 and half years out and I go months without thinking about it... Staying busy helps..But the holidays is always hard for me..Make me wonder how many more xmas times I will see...I know..it sucks...
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yup...agree totally
im only 1 year 4mos from diagnosis but it all still feels so fresh...struggling with the holidays this year aswell. I think its normal, maybe not for all of us but definitely some of us have a harder time. My brains seems to get stuck and its really hard for me to move this to another part. Im on bco on my kids xmas break so what does that tell you!
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Grrr.... my Christmas wish is for us all to wake up from this nightmare!!
@Pure, you are 3.5 years out, that gives me hope!! I am starting my 2nd year out from active treatment and I want to get thru it unscathed!! Cheers to all!! I hope the new year brings us all good health!!
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Cheryl - looks like we diagnosed about the same time. I went to Parkview Center/Summa Barberton for treatment. I have been on Aromasin since April this year (after rads) and finally talked with my MO about an anti-depressant. I just needed the help to combat the side effects of the Aromasin. What a difference!
I've been loving the holidays this year. Compared to last year when I had just finished chemo - they were wonderful. Sending good wishes for a wonderful new year your way.
Diane
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Yup, it sucks a big you know what
Sorry you are feeling down. I get it though. It's the freakin roller coaster ride we all want off of right? Stay strong, this will pass and you'll feel better soon. Try to get out and stay busy to keep your mind off of "it".....
Take care,
Sharon
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I finished active treatment in September and this Xmas was certainly less carefree! Found myself wondering at quiet moments how many more I'd celebrate. Happy my last scans were clear but this is an unpredictable disease. I also burst into tears when I bumped into my parents friend when she asked how I'm doing. I actually feel pretty good and have had a really nice relaxing time but felt so annoyed with myself that I can be reduced to tears at the mention of breast cancer... hate this!
Health and happiness to you all for 2013 -
Lillymillie - me too, i am 8 months on from diagnosis and was mega depressed all Christmas, seriously so, feeling like there was no hope etc........it hs been worse for me since stopping active treatment and I hate how i am physically and emotionally now
Lets hope 2013 is better for all of us
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@Diane, that is where I went as well. Dr. Sprance. 2 more days of xmas vacation then back to work. Something to occupy my time, keep my mind off things.
This year was better than last year for sure! I hope we all have many more holidays!!
Hope everyone has a happy and healthy 2013!!
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Cheryl - Dr. Sprance is my BS! I love her - she is phenomenal. Dr. Hazra is my MO - a long time BC survivor and a wonderful person.
You may want to talk to your MO. If you are on aromatase inhibitors you may benefit from some 'help'. I say better living through chemistry. I fought depression for several months and that is just not my normal personality. Once I got on meds, life became much better. Just couldn't do it myself.
Diane
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Just seeing this post now-
I also think more about bc during the holidays. For me it's the lead up to my cancerversary and the retrospective of each ornament and thinking of my kids.
I can hopefully give some of you some hope...I am coming up on 7 years since diagnosis. When first diagnosed my kids were 4,6,and 8. They are now 11, 13 and 15!! I never thought I would still be here but here I am! My youngest doesn't even remember when I had cancer.
So, yes, holidays are harder for lots of us- its totally normal. -
I tend to feel worse around the holidays as all of the relatives who were not supportive while I was in active treatment are showing up now and expect me to be "back to the good old days". Their expectation is that the cancer is now gone and any lingering phyiscal, mental, or emotional side effects that I have should be ignored. In otherwords, I should be back to what I was three years ago and any anger towards them for dumping me and my family is inappropriate.
So, lots of anger at the holiday season - especially when they make their annual call and chide me for not phoning....
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Well it's over. Yeah! Back to work, boo.. Hoping for an early spring.
@pebee, that sucks about your relatives!! No, there is no going back to the good old days, I wish it was like that. I wish we could go thru treatment and then be cured.
@caaclark-your post does give me some hope!! 7 years!! I can't wait (I hope) to get there!!!
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