Fuzzy's Romp Room

YES, MOSQUITO, is good for sooooooo many occasions.

The Bad bug has struck 3 that were to be at dinner tomorrow, all different geographic locations. Bad bug--bad.

To all Ditto to what Crog said, I can't conceive of what this time without you all would have been like. From a Christmas Carol, the ghost of Christmas present--we have the milk of human kindness -here. L&H&P's sassy

My Dearest, Sweetest Rompette, and FUZZY most of all,

I went thru some bullshit for a few day about a week ago, just COULD NOT POST.  Fuzzy, at this point, you are DONE with those horrible infusions.  Maybe what I can say about my medicines will help, I don't know.  I'm stuck with some meds, others I can fool around with.  Well, all my docs doubled all my medicines and changed one kind.  I had felt like a saint late summer after that much-needed change, but then husband started to whine about how I was acting strange. So, for the first time living with my husband for almost 30 years, I FELT WIERD LIVING IN MY OWN HOUSE.  That ain't right. 

So, we've had two talks now, and I think I've got him squared away.  I went back to taking my medicine exactly like it's prescribed for me now. I found out what REALLY bothered husband, and I am able to not do those things.  I mean, it got ridiculous, I'd wake up REALLY early, like 2 a.m., so I'd eat breakfast and feed the dog.  This infuriated Richard. So, NOW if I wake early, I WAIT until his normal breakfast.  Stuff like that.  Hub REALLY DID lose it for a while there, took it all out on me, and when I tried to cut back on my meds, the meds I needed SO BADLY for so many years, PLUS I felt rather well after around spring this year, the cancer finally left me, but cutting back on meds was a huge mistake.  Ruined everything.

Now, I think everyone should take their meds like they're supposed to.  Only thing is, I'd give everything I had to be able to get off my SSRI antidepressant.  They don't hurt me, it's just I don't see the point, and the difficulty in getting off it and a lot of other drugs keeps me on that one in particular.  Fuzzy, I'll just say this one thing and then get off the subject.  I really hope you don't have to go back on an SSRI antidepressant drug, I hope you're done wit them.  BUT I could be wrong so I have to stay out of opinions on it, really.  Everyone reacts diff to diff thing.  Pain killers and tranquilizers really do it for me, altho I do take other stuff.  But those are the best and happen to be the easiest to get off.

So many funny things have been said by all of you the last five or ten pages, I cannot recount them all.  But ALL of you have such good senses of humor.  I find lately I have been seeing more beauty in the simplest things, even in my imaginations.  Colors, textures, glowing lights, and of course I listen to music half the day with my playlist on the computer. It's all real sweet bluesy stuff.  I even have one of Elvis's songs on here that just breaks me up, "Are You Lonesome Tonight," and you might recall there's a place in there where he just talks to his girlfriend, about fouror five paragraphs.  Well, in the third graph, he goes, "Baby, you lied to me when you told me you loved me....."  Always so funny.

I think you all remember I had pneumonia for a week there, spent a few days in the hospital, signed myself out so my antibiotics didn't transfer over to the pharmacy. So, I got some Enchenacea tea which acts like anti-infective for people, so I won't lose too much from losing the antibiotic.  It's got just abot every other herb in it too, tastes awful, but got some in my coffee or milk every day.  I'm hanging in.  Richard has had pneumonia off and on about three times.  He needs to go to the VA (Vietnam Vet) but won't go.  He had cancer years back and simply is too freaked out to go.  I'm fairly sure why that's why he got so upset with me, he's just so sick with coughing and such.  Good think I'm the perfect person I am, or we'd have split LONG time ago.  HAHAHAHa. 

I want to do some sketching ladies.  I've been fooling with it online and also in my sketchbooks with pencil.  I got a long ways to go. And I've been fooling with the guiltar more, too, and that is getting better much more rapidly.  Fuzzy, all I can think about is how sorry I am about your Mom Having some really serious health problems, and you're in the middle of your bullshit.  About all I can suggest is it was hard to ask, but about five years ago I told Richard I was too weak and in too much pain (my back), and I needed him to go to the grocery for me sometimes.  Since I long ago got it down to every two weeks, when he does one grocery, I get a whole month off!  i DO THAT three or four times a year now.  Maybe someting  you could think of like that for husband to help with will help you do better during this time.  Have you been doing any runnng or yoga?  We gotta get your rhythm and soft stuff back now and then.   I just thank Heavenly Father that he give you your little puppy.  Just a little while ago I got lonesome and called Smokey, and he came right in here and laid down.  SMILE.

I LOVE ALL OF YOU. Thanksforlettingme rant.  Always,Gail P.S.  Happy Xmas Eve!

Hi sasschatzi.... Yes, I did contact the FDA, and  TEVA, which made the generic brand of Tamoxifen that I was taking  ("barr 904 imprint tamoxifen 20 mg.)... Douglas Labs, Dr. Keith Duncan, and Teva called back, wanting more information, and this was about 9 months ago.   I don't think I will hear from any of them again. 

I didn't have a hearing test, but maybe 20 years ago, when I was working, and needed one for the tours I was giving at Coors, and going into places where we had to wear ear plugs.  I had perfect hearing at the time.  I also read "Deafness Hearing Loss in Tamoxifen"

http://www.ehealthme.com/ds/tamoxifen+citrate/deafness and "Tamoxifen, Tears and Terror"....

Yes, I know Dreamers.... Not only a fall, but loud music, or extreme noise by your ear, or even temporary deafness from too many aspirin!   But I guess all I know is I am scared to death to take any of the other drugs.  The Oncologist, after reading (I hope) all the papers I sent her on why I thought it was the Tamoxifen) said "So you don't want to stay on the Tamoxifen?"   Well HELL no, Pal!   Maybe my age also had something to do with it...  I also don't want any one else to stop taking any drugs, because of what they read here....   Just be aware.... sometimes things happen, that no-one can explain. 

I didn't have chemo.... although the oncotype score was 19....  But one Onco wanted me to do it anyway, another one said no, she didn't think it was necessary, with my grade, type, and especially my age...  

But this happened so fast!  I mean 14 months on Tamoxifen, and one morning I could not hear in my left ear.  Then the right!  It hasn't changed. The first ENT said it is permanent, "possibly drug related"  but could tell "why" without surgery.  But I don't want to go through that. 

So sas-shatzi, thank you for posting back!  And dog-eyed.... I like reading what you guys have to say... maybe it could help me somewhere down the line.  And no, I didn't take anything else with it!    Maybe a White Russion once in awhile...but that's it...  I even started a thread on here....

"Deafness from Tamoxifen"....but there are only a FEW on here that this has happened to.... Some have contacted me.... but there is no way to prove it, and none of the people or the FDA or the companies  contacted  me......  So it's just one of those things, you just learn to live with it. 

Guess it could be worse, right?  Hey you guys, thanks, and y'all have a Merry Christmas!  Thanks sas-shatzi.... for caring.

Yes, your eye problems.... I know of several women who had to have eye surgery for cataracts while on Tamoxifen.....   you just can't find anyone to work WITH you, and help find a cause ..... The ENT's know that certain ototoxic drugs "can" cause deafness, sometimes temporary and sometimes permanent... It's no wonder we are so apprehensive about the drugs we are supposed to take...

And hugs to you too!..... 

I don't even see an Oncologist anymore!  I only go for a physical once a year, to my Primary Care.... And SHE runs those other CA blood tests also.  And now, I don't have to have another mammogram for a year!  I would prefer to stay away from them all, at least all their "cures." 

Okay, go ahead and holler... I know the bon-fire one too, but it doesn't do me any good to holler!  Guess I'm pretty lucky....Yes, where's Jo,  Ducky, and Granny.... otherwise known as Kantalope.... Ha!  Guess it's just you and me babe!  Ha, ha!

I used to have days where I just wanted to give it up.... to just lay down and cry like a baby..... but it would have made my DH feel so bad!   I didn't want him to think "I couldn't handle it."   I knew I had him to lean on... and just thinking about that, made me hold on. 

I didn't want to talk to my Daughter's about things that worried me, because it would make THEM worry even more.  ... So I could come here, and talk about everything that worried me!  And reading other's problems, make me more aware of maybe how I could handle something....  I really don't have any problems, like some of our gals do.... I am  thankful.....  I didn't have as hard of a time as a lot of these women here...... and I am really grateful for all the help!  xoxoxoxo

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all my sisters. You are all an inspiration in your own ways and i don't know what i'd do without you

Oh! I got a bracelet that says "cancer can suck it." hahahaha. I like it soooo much better than pink ribbons.

Cindy, I hope you are healing well. Does it seem to be doing better? I know you would like to be moving forward with the "leg man." Cute.

Sas. Wow. Congratulations. You are a brave soul . . . not about bringing the dog into your home but omg . . . a man! Aren't they an awful lot of trouble? hehehehe. Just kidding.

Veggy, I, too, am glad you are feeling well enough after chemo to be hungry. What is the countdown on those treatments btw? Yours too Rider?

Merry Christmas to all my "sisters" and may the New Year bring health and happiness

Merry Christmas ducky!  Haven't seen you around anywhere lately.... are you alright?  

Hey Dune - Nice to see you. Quiet here, has been snowing about 2 inches. DD did not come out because of the snow. She would have hardly gotten here late last night just to turn around and go back early this am. Texans don't do well in snow/ice. Goats just about tucked in for the night with warm water and more hay. Going to settle in and watch Downton Abbey on PBS later. Found some pork steaks in freezer. Have them on to bake low/slow with a Mexican tomato sauce called Sofrito, onion, frozen peppers and some cherry tomatoes on their last leg. I could fall in love with this stuff.

So what is the A+ test you are studying for? Is that computer stuff from your class? I am at a loss with most things computer. DH said if they wanted someone to test something to get it to crash, give it to me. His best compliment for XP when we went to buy him a new laptop this summer was that I had managed not to crash it.

Keep in touch. It's gonna be a new year and new things to look forward to. Not a Pollyanna by any means. I'm usually a "glass half empty" kinda girl. But gotta look forward. Hope you have a good evening.

Merry Christmas to all! I finally just had to check in with my peeps. We're in Oregon at DS's house. DD came with her two sons (20 & 23) and a college student from Burma. Her family knows SIL's family and they asked him to stay in touch with her. This is her first Christmas, and it's white (but melting). She's very sweet and fun. Santa brought lots of stuff for the little boys (5 & 8). We're going to have salmon for dinner (how northwest can you get?).

Fuzzy, sending good vibes for your Mom.

Health in the new year for everyone--that's my wish.

Hey luvmygoats! Your pork steaks sound yummy alright! I hope you enjoyed that dish thoroughly. And yes, the A+ test is to get certified in computer repair. I'm hoping I will be up to doing that part-time. We will have to see. One thing is for sure. I am hoping 2013 is better than 2012. I'll do what I can t make it so, but I have appointments with shrinks, lawyer, ultrasound, and oncologist coming up. A lot of how 2013 will be is going to be affected by what happens at these appointments. I know. We can choose how we react to the news . . . in theory. Oh well. It is all going to be good anyway. Right?

Wren, sounds like you are having a nice time. I'm glad to hear it.

Fuzzy, I didn't know that about MRSA. I guess I'm going to have to do some research on that. You sure took good care of your mom though. Way to go! And yeah, isn't that a great cancer comment? I do like it sooo much better than pink ribbons.

Thanks Fuzzy. That is very encouraging.   Oh yes, about the rats. Until I moved here in 2000 I had never lived with rats. I don't think they were bad when I got here. I was pretty oblivious to them. Some people said they were there, so when I was visiting neighbors in the evening, I would make sure to walk back home in the middle of the alley, not near the fences (where the trash cans are and where they might jump out at me). However, in recent years, the neighborhood has declined. Most people who live here now are renters, and they just don't care like owners do. I was doing a lot with reporting rat harborages and taking pictures so that people would get fined and thus be forced to care. Of course, the renters don't get the fines. The landlords do. But after a certain number of violations, they can be harshly fined for "nuisance complaints." These fines run in the thousands and tens of thousands, so they force the landlords, most of whom are slum lords, to set stricter standards and to pay attention to their properties. I hated doing that. I felt like a "code nazi." However, I don't like being afraid to open my door at dusk through morning for fear a rat will run in. I don't like being afraid to put my trash out at night for fear of the rats. And I will be really pissed if rats make a home in my car and eat the wiring. Pissed and grossed out. Know what I mean? And the worst would be if rats got into a house  that I'm connected to. There are 6 houses connected, then an "end of group" (that would be me), then another six houses connected, then another, and then another. I think that makes up a block. Anyway, I've been fortunate so far. No rats or other icky things from the people in my little group. Not so far. But if one of us gets rats or mice or roaches, we all get them. I don't know how they get through. The walls seperating each house are fire walls. However, I can smell the cigarette smoke from my neighbor's house in my closets that are against the wall I share with him. Anyway, that's the skinny on rats in the city.

Thanks again for the encouragement!