Am I the only one feeling like this.

Hi, Laura, and welcome to the forum!

Listen to Margi - she is very wise!

So sorry to hear about your mom's diagnosis...I remember when my mom got diagnosed - it was like my world fell apart. She was 61 years old (the age I was when I was diagnosed last year). She went on to have a radical mastectomy, with no other treatment.

When she was 67, she was diagnosed with Parkinsons disease. For the last ten years of her life she was in a care facility. Despite the fact that my brother and sister were local, I was the only one going to see Mom every day, taking her to doctor visits, etc. My sister never seemed to have the time to visit; my brother "couldn't stand to see Mom like that" and only saw her twice a year. I made excuses for both of them so Mom wouldn't be hurt.

You are a wonderful, caring daughter. Your mom is very lucky to have you. Yes, it is very hard to see those we love in pain or discomfort. You need to have an outlet - somewhere you can cry, vent, and let out those normal emotions. You don't need to be Superwoman. If you have no one close, then you have this awesome forum. Everyone here understands what you are experiencing.

I spent the time with my mom in the nursing home, enjoying the time we had together. I did my crying at home. Mom lived to the age of 87, still no evidence or recurrence of cancer, and passed from complications of Parkinsons.

Your mom may recover very well from her surgery and her treatments. You may have a very long time left with her. Please believe me on this: you will never, ever regret the time you spent helping her. It will be a shared experience that no one can take away from you. If other family members can't get on board, it's truly their loss.

Hang in there. Try not to anticipate the future....just take things one day at a time. You will find blessings all along the way if you look.

Big hugs to you...

Laura,

Where did I get my strength?  Same place you'll get yours - from your Mom    Let her lead, but be the best dance partner she's ever had.   You do have to cry and, so does she.  I will never forget the day that Mum and I both admitted that her final reward was going to be a promotion to Heaven.  We both had a good cry together that ended up with both of us getting a case of the giggles because we were soaking each other's shoulders and had snotty noses.  I doubt I've ever felt closer to her than in that moment.  THOSE are the memories I will eternally treasure.  

Blessings20 has given you some wonderful advice here - do remember to take time for yourself along the way.  At this point, you don't know what her diagnosis/prognosis is but, regardless, it will still shake up your world.  If she is open to it, go with her to the doctor's appointments and help her plan ahead with her (and your) questions.  Be her advocate, be her researcher, bring her to these boards too - there are lots of sections where she may be able to find contemporaries going through the same thing she is.  Lots of new treatment strategies are talked about here and my experience is that the more educated you both are, the better the treatment plan can be.  Mum and I were soldiers in the war together and we had a very strong partnership in her care.  Knowledge is power in this case and there is a HUGE stock of information here at this website.  

And remember to come back here if you need hugs.  We have an endless supply and wide, waterproof shoulders.  

Hugs and love

Margi