Has anyone started a Dec 2011 group?

I had a UMX without reconstruction and was required to stay in the hospital for one night.  The next morning I practically flew out of there...couldnt wait to go home!  Im told that BMX is a somewhat more challenging because movement is limited...I at least had my right side.  Also TE's seem to add an additional challenge.  I will let the other ladies fill you in on that.

Im 2 1/2 weeks since my UMX and other than being lopsided, im pretty much back to normal. A bit sore but nothing that Advil cant take care of.  Im working from home for this week and next and then back into the office.  Hoping that I can wear my prosthesis by then...no way im going to work with one boob!

I had a BMX with TE's and I was in 2 nights.  I don't remember much about it because I was so drugged up.  I think I was having some pain issues so I stayed an extra night.  How bad is this...I don't even remember coming home or that my sister was there with me at the hospital when I got discharged.  I do remember that it was late in the evening when I went home.  It was more of the tissue expanders and the drains.  I remember when the drains came out, I was a NEW person!!!!  The last one came out on black Friday and I actually went shopping!!!  (Surgery was 11/10)

So...here is a question for all of you...how is the chemo brain???  I am still VERY foggy and I can't spell or read anymore.  I get words mixed up and have to re-read them all the time and I USED to be a VERY good speller.  It's almost like I am dyslexic now.  This, of course, scares the crap out of me.  (you know...is there something else going on fears that you have).  Please, please tell me that someone out there is still foggy!!!!  I do have a friend that is 3 years out and still has some issues with that, so that was kind of promising!!! 

for me, its my memory....i cant remember shit!

Yes, Kellogs...I think stress has A LOT to do with it, too!!  I find that when I get myself really stressed out it is worse....and words TOTALLY leave my brain, too!!!  Oh how I hate that!!!

2 things...First thing...I ran out to my van tonight "commando" (no wig/hat/bandanna) and guess what I felt???  I felt my "hair" blowing in the wind!!!!!  It's literally only 1/16th to 1/8th of an inch long, but it blows in the wind!!!!  

Second thing...Not sure if I mentioned this here or not, but my mom passed away 3 1/2 years ago from pulmonary fibrosis.  My dad remarried a year later to a really, really wonderful lady.  She couldn't come to my party on Saturday so tonight she gave me a gift and a card....this is what it said....

"I think you are one of the strongest people I know, how you faced your diagnosis of cancer was amazing.  I know there had to be times of real fears but you met them head on!  You were an encouragement to me!  If I would have had a daughter, I would have wanted her to be as strong as you.  God is Good!!!  PS...We will have to do a pedicure again!"

Of course, she made me cry with this!!!!  As weird as this may sound, as sick as my mom was, I am SO glad she was/is not here to see me going through this. Looking back on life, I can see God's hand in all of this.  I'm so thankful for my husband...who almost wasn't my husband, LOL!!!  (long story short...after our 1st date, I told my mom he would make a great husband but I wasn't ready yet....we stayed friends for 1 1/2 years and then he drove 3 hours to fix my laptop and we were married 6 weeks later...hadn't seen him in about 4 or 5 months before that)   I guess I am just seeing a lot of the "why" questions being answered.  As much as I miss my mom and really do wish she were here and healthy, I am glad that I had/have a mother figure in my life to comfort me and to help out with Jake (my little guy...who loves her like crazy).  She has been a huge blessing to us, even though I was not super happy when my dad started dating and then they got married 1 year later.  

So...all in all...a good night....working on cleaning this trashed house of mine and decluttering!! 

Lori - I'm glad you have a mother figure who can help you through this.  She obviously loves you like you were her own daughter and that is a gift.  God works in mysterious ways.  I spent 12 years after my divorce alone, raising my girls by myself.  I was determined that I would never "settle" again, that I would only get married again if I knew with my whole heart and soul that he was "the one".  Well, turns out I dated him in high school and hadn't seen him in 27 years but thanks to the wonder of Facebook, we reconnected.  4 months later I moved in with him and another 10 months later we were married.  5 months later I was diagnosed.  I really feel like God brought us together and I can't imagine how I would have dealt with this without him.  I would be alone since my youngest DD just finished her first year of college and lived on campus.

I find that I am acutely aware now of just how grateful I am for everyone in my life and for every day I get to share with them.  That is one gift that BC gave me.

Lori and Kelly, both of your stories bring tears to my eyes.  God is so good.  And He brings angels in our lives when we most need it.  Like both of you, I am amazed at the love and kindness that people have shown to me during this process.  And some of them have been the most unexpected people and that makes it even more special.

Laura, thanks, I'm right behind u

Ladies, an update. I am done rads as of Monday. I am on the Menformin trial and will tamox two weeks after rads. Omg it has all gone so fast. Hoping my head recovers as quickly as my body. Lol. I went to see about talking to someone at psycho oncology and they have a waiting list. They did say that should I be considering hurting myself they would move me up on the list. Lol. I am not at that place but would like to talk to someone about what the heck just happened. Anybody else thinking their heads are recovering as quickly as their body?



I was brave enough to ask what the chances are of this coming back. Lol. Held my breath for a long time until the doctor answered. Stats are stats. Can't put alot of stock in them. We all have a better chance of it not coming back.

My eyes are terrible!!! My left eye is still red and irritated and I can't wear my contacts...which makes me very grumpy. I hate wearing a wig AND my glasses...just way too much irritation going on and more things that "aren't me", if that makes sense. I am actually going to the eye Dr in 2 weeks to see about the irritation in my left eye and hopefully get some kind of relief.



Now that we are starting to grow hair and summer weather is fast approaching, what is everyone doing??? Bandannas, wigs, commando??? My wig is just too dang hot but I don't want to shock people who don't know and who have only seen me with the wig. (Like at my little guys's baseball games)

Oh, and as soon as its long enough, I'm getting extensions.

I have no idea what I am going to do, but, dang....I don't know if I can handle the heat with that thing on. My hair that is coming back in has changed from stubble to super soft fuzz!!! That's progress, right??? Oh, and I have shaved my legs for a 2nd time!!!!! How sad is that...being excited about shaving your legs. Just tired of looking like a naked mole rat. LOL!!!!



On the energy level....I have stripped the bed and washed the sheets already today and I worked all day yesterday in my kitchen and living room. Feels good to be able to get this stuff done!!! My house has been terribly neglected the last 6 months so I have a TON of catching up to do.

I'm sticking with the wig and turbans for now. The hair that I didn't lose is growing at a pretty good clip, and I have some new-growth stubble. Still less than a newborn, so no commando for me. Noticed stubble on the legs, too, so I'll probably have to shave in the next 2 weeks.

Has anyone noticed that their face is an odd texture - just really soft. I can't really describe it. But I was wondering whether it's because I've lost any of the usually unnoticeable tiny hairs that I usually have (like down). 

Awww...Tskaiser...you are too sweet!!!  : )

Well...I did it...I went out all day with just a hat on.  I spent the day with my sister out and about and then went to the airport to pick up my niece and her partner from the UK (they don't believe in marriage and are expecting their 1st baby in September!!)  I had 2 people ask me about cancer and one lady at the airport came over and grabbed my hand and squeezed it and asked if I was a survivor.  She said, Me, too...Bless You!!!!!  And then she was off.  The first lady I talked to at the farmer's market was a 15 year survivor.  It was kind of weird, but cool at the same time.  

Anyway, hope everyone is have a fantabulous weekend!!!!!!  

Had Taxol 10/12, only 2 more to go, yeah baby!

Yes, Rachel it sure is, man this is a long ride, so wanted to jump off many times, but glad I didn't thanks for the encouragement ladies!