Starting Chemo April 2009

Doing fine here, just busy.  I did a presentation to a client for a big new project and just found out that I won it!  It is going to be a lot of work in the short term, but could be really good for me overall. When they called to tell me, I felt like "Yay" and "Oh no!" at the same time. But step by step I will work through it and I will learn a lot in the meantime.

I have had SO MUCH TROUBLE taking off the extra 10-20 lbs I am carrying (since starting Tamox). You all KNOW how hard I work out!  So when I see the onc in a few weeks I am going to ask her if I can try Metformin. it is a blood sugar regulator that is in clinical trial to prevent bc right now. It may help me by keeping my insulin levels lower and possibly, hopefully make it easier to take some of the weight off. I wonder if she will give it to me. I have read about it on this site, some oncs do and some don't.  I'll let you know.

 Other than that, things are good. We are planning our garden and doing some other home improvement type things around the house. Funny how spring motivates you like that.

Judy - congrats on starting the new job. But it IS an adjustment.  I know that we don't do any real socializing during the week at all. If we do anything, it is early and we are home by 9.  We go to a lecture series sometimes at the local university on Wed nights but it is over around 8:30 or so. I know it is hard for you to say no, and I know that friends/family are so important to you. But please remember that you have busy/full days awaiting you each morning and you need to get your rest.  And get some good take-out for your family some nights so you don't have to cool every night. It won't hurt them and they will love it. Some of the money you bring in can and SHOULD (in my opinion) be used to make your life a bit easier.

In fact, I was thinking about this new project that will make me so much busier - I was considering hiring a p/t admin to help me with filing and stuff. But then I thought..no, what I really hate is housecleaning. I might hire someone to do that instead, freeing my time up a bit more from something I really don't like. Of course we have to see how much money this project really brings in first!   But that is my idea anyway.

Love to all of you.
Betsy I am glad you are starting to feel better. Sorry about the rain though. That can be dismal after a while.

Love to all

Amy 

ps Helen your note to Pam above was so sweet & supportive. 

Amy, good to hear from you and congratulations on the new project! Well done you!!! I am sure that it may be a little overwhelming, but getting help in the house is a great idea and will help you to focus on your work and other things you enjoy. I have help once a week, it is good to know that it is being taken care of even if I have to do a few touch ups here and there.

You are right about the entertaining and socializing, I think that I will need to ease off on that for a while and just focus on working, my family and keeping myself as rested as possible. I have been trying very hard to watch what I eat for the past few months, but if my weight goes up even a little, then I simply cannot shift it. Strangely, the exact same thing happened about this time last  year. So, as long as my clothes fit me and I am eating healthily and excercising, I am trying not to think about it too much.

Helen, I have heard about the theory that not eating wheat can help with weight loss; problem is, I cannot imagine not eating bread or baked goods, they are certainly my weakness .

Hope Pam is doing ok today. Hugs to you all, Judy x

Helen, sounds good, I would love to know how it goes on Friday. With the Passover Holiday coming up, it is going to be challenging to really watch what I eat. I know that I will have to make a big effort to get back on track after the Holiday.

Hope everyone is doing ok today, sending hugs, Judy x

Happy Passover. Happy Easter .... to all .... regardless of what you are celebrating!!!

I did go for a weigh in with the nutritionist today ... in total have lost 7.5 pounds in just over 3 weeks - so it's working. Although I have a mountain of weight to lose and this is just a drop in the bucket but at least it's moving in the right direction. I have given up wheat on my own - not suggested by the nutritionist - but she knows I'm doing it. She's also reading the book Wheat Belly but she doesn't believe there is a "magic bullet" to weight loss and I do agree with her but I'm going to keep it up. Also I'm using a website call "My Fitness Pal" to track what I eat. It's free and it's an amazing site. She wants me to eat a minimum of 1200 calories a day but if I exercise, I have to eat more. She said it's important to keep powered up so your metabolism works faster. I never believed in this but I am losing so I'll keep going. Hope everyone is having a wonderful long weekend.  

Helen, really pleased to read that you are making progress with the weight loss. It sounds like a great start to me : - )

Titan, thanks for your good wishes, I really appreciate the support that I am getting here for my new job. Sorry that you don't like your boss, must be very frustrating for you.

Hope everyone is enjoying the Holiday weekend, sending you all hugs as always, Judy xxx

Wheat Belly is the name of the book. The doc who wrote it claims wheat is the villain in our diets.

Saw the oncologist this morning.  I don't know if you remember, but all throughout treatment, i had this old, cranky male onc and it was very stressful for me. Well last year I switched to a young woman in the same practice. Only saw her once and what a HUGE difference it made.  So knowing I would see her today made all the difference. I still hate going into the cancer center. But it was wonderful seeing her. She is so open, friendly, conversant - just awesome. She said that I was doing great and we just had a generally super-positive talk.  

Of course the BEST part of it was leaving and knowing I don't have to go back for another six months!

Glad it's over.

Geri - good luck with yours. I know it's not fun. But it will be over quickly.

OH she told me that as of 2014, I will only have to go ONCE/year.  That will be awesome!

Titan - that sounds rough. How long till he retires? Maybe it's a GOOD thing that he takes a lot of time off. Might be easier with him not there than being there.

Love to all! 

Geri, really hope the Onc goes ok today, please let us know. I also have a couple of pounds to lose this week, that gets me down.

Amy, good to hear you had a positive experience at the Oncologist, I agree that the calendar was inappropriate, small things can trigger upset - that needs to be considered.

Sending hugs to you all, Judy x

Geri, so good to hear that the appt went well and that you have graduated to visits every 6 months. As you say, every step forward is something. Hope you are enjoying your weekend and relaxing after the appointment.

Hope everyone is doing ok and having a good weekend.

Sending you all hugs, Judy x

Betsy, so sorry that you are having such a hard time, (((hugs))) to you from me! It definitely sounds like you need a day to breathe. Having so many appointments and getting mixed messages can drive anyone crazy. Take some time to think things through at your own pace so you can make decisions that work for you. Thinking about you.

I have just come back from a trip to the UK to visit family, it was booked before I started my job, so it was ok with them. It was great to spend time with my parents, sister, BIL and nephews. It is always hard to come back after being there. I am not even going near the scales till I have eaten sensibly for a few days , there is nothing like my mother's cooking! LOL!

Must get on with the unpacking now, sending you all hugs and hope you are all doing ok today.

Judy x

Helen, almost 10 pounds! That is great! Looking forward to hearing good news!

Betsy, how are you doing today?

Hugs to you all, Judy x

Betsy - It has been a few days since you posted. I hope by now you are feeling a bit better. I know you have some fun things planned - the fall trip to Europe among them. I hope none of this physical stuff interferes.  It is hard when stuff keeps happening and it isn't just 'over' as badly as we want it to be.  I am confused about the trainer - did you decide not to go? In some ways, a trainer can really add value to your quality of life.

My husband resisted for YEARS and finally a new trainer came to our gym and he liked him so he gave him a try.  This is a man (my DH) whose back has hurt for YEARS and he refused to do anything (except complain, lol). Now - a few months later - no back pain and he is totally obsessed with the gym and his training. And even stretching, which I've encouraged him about for years. Did he listen? No! But now, the trainer wants him to stretch and he's all about it.    Just sharing that to tell you that sometimes a fitness pro can encourage you and steer you in a good direction (and sometimes even make it fun).

Re eliminating food groups - I know there is a lot of mixed info out there. Many approaches say not to eliminate anything b/c they are afraid the average person won't stay with it, so they tout a more moderate approach. But there are some foods that really don't contribute to our health very much. I think sugar, alcohol and wheat are among them. I've eliminated alcohol, and try to keep sugar to a minimum. I don't really eat that much wheat products anyway.  But if I could have the discipline, I would eliminate all three, and probably dairy too. But that type of eating (over a lifetime, not just briefly) is too restrictive for me. 

I have this 20 lbs that will NOT COME OFF no matter what I do.  When i saw the onc, I asked for metformin, a very widely prescribed diabetes 2 medicine that has been shown to help with weight loss and is also being tested clinically as a bc preventative.  She took some convincing but gave me the rx.  The stuff I read said that many people lose 10% of their body weight in the first year of taking it.  I have the bottle on the counter - keep staring at it, not ready  to start taking it yet. But it might be something to consider. I'll report back with my results.

Judy - glad your coworkers are nice to you. They should be. I KNOW you are nice to them!! I can tell you are the kind of woman who is warm and nice to all.

Love to everybody.

Helen - baby yet? 

Amy, was so interested to read about your approach to a trainer, I am so pleased it has been such a positive influence on you and your dh's lives.

I also don't think I can eliminate complete food groups. I try and keep everything in moderation, I am not sure it actually helps me lose anything, but keeps me more or less at the same weight.

Helen, I am sure it was hard for you to put on a hair piece, it is just the constant reminders every day of having had the disease, I don't know if it does ever end. My eyelashes are tiny now, they never came back long like they used to be, but I found a good clinique mascara which makes them look quite good. Looking forward to hearing about the new arrival!

Betsy, I hope you are doing ok this week. Geri and Titan, hope all is well with you both.

Sending you all hugs, Judy x

Hi to all - just wanted to stay in touch...it has been a difficult week...I had to terminate a director in my office (she had been warned and counseled, but as is the case in most situations, she did not see her issues as I or the company did, and she was conducting a personal vendetta against two other employees, so there really was no choice but to let her go (she had worked for us about 8 months).  I had known I had to do this for about three weeks and it kept getting put off by my boss for one reason or another, but this week I said I had to do it and get it over with because the stress of anticipation was getting to me..I was not sleeping, not eating well, irritable, etc.  I'm glad I spoke up and on Thursday I told her.  That is the worst part of my job - necessary, but absolutely the worst part.  And now I need to take over her responsibilities until I hire someone.  Oh well, comes with the territory, and at least it's over.  Oh, and after she left (yelling and hollering I might add), I found that the paperwork that she told me had all been done was not even started...some vindication for the way things turned out.

So, this has been my R&R weekend...thanks for listening (as if you have a choice...lol)

Oh yikes..the colonscopy..I keep putting it off and I know I shouldn't..dang it...i just don't want to go there...I'm two years over due

Geri...where can I apply...I'm ready for a change.....but then again it would be bad if you would have to fire me...lol