Alone - recent double mastectomy

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  • theyaregone
    theyaregone Member Posts: 52
    edited March 2012

    Moon I haven't returned her calls today but I will probably talk to her in a couple days.  You see, I don't have any friends so if I dumped her, I'd have nobody at all. 

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  • Leah_S
    Leah_S Member Posts: 8,458
    edited March 2012

    TAG, since you have joined 2 groups you'll soon have others who will become real friends.

    Quite frankly, my reaction to your last statement "If I dumped her I'd have nobody at all" is "You don't have her".

    I hope you form good friendships with other women in these groups so you won't be lonely any more.

    Leah

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  • Galsal
    Galsal Member Posts: 1,886
    edited March 2012

    Are there no other female Vets at your VFW?  Some female Vets relate to and can talk with others of the same genre is why I'm asking. The person that went with me to the second opinion and preop appts as well as visited me while in the hospital is another Female Vet.

    That's just my two cents TAG.  For what ever that's worth.  

    Sally

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  • theyaregone
    theyaregone Member Posts: 52
    edited March 2012

    Now another dumb question.  The swelling in my arm is gone but my hand is swollen mostly between my thumb and forefinger.  It almost feels like someone yanked my thumb way back.  The pain when I touch the "web" is terribly painful.

    I had the ultrasound to see if I had the bloodcot and I don't.  I am not sure if this is lymphedema because of where it is located.

    Any ideas?  This started hurting immediately after surgery and I am seriously wondering if someone grabbed my thumb the wrong way or something.  I hate to ask my surgeon because I get the impression that he thinks I am a pain already.

    Now something else.  I got the trial boobs for the weekend.  I really like the one that has that white soft filling stuff on the inside.  I hate the bra she gave to to try.  I put the foobs in my own bra.  She didn't give me the covers for them so they were right against my skin and at first the coolness felt so good then the warmth did.

    So, has anyone made pockets for their own bras?  What's your experience?

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  • Myleftboob
    Myleftboob Member Posts: 1,469
    edited March 2012

    Hey TAG

    I wish I could give  you some good advice on  your thumb.  I'm thinking it still could be LE because alot of women wear gauntlets for LE that affects the hand/wrist right?

    The mastectomy clinic I went to here near Toronto had lovely bras, I had a hard time picking out 4 which is what my insurance will cover from an annualized cost.  The pocket in already sewn in and the prostesis just slids right in.  Its silicone it cost like $450!!  Of course I only bought one and just change it up as I change bras.  I had the soft ones that were filled with basically cotton batton at first.  I had purchased two tops that could accomadate these right after surgery. Couldn't have handled the weight of the silicone one until about 6 weeks post op.  Now I forget I have it on.  Has a massage affect too.

    She carries bra pockets that you can sew right into one of your own bras or swimsuites, below is a link to her website.  I think you mentioned you sew so you could likely make these yourself.

    http://diannesmastectomy.com/bras/model-191-bra-pocket/

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  • Binney4
    Binney4 Member Posts: 8,609
    edited March 2012

    Tag, the web between thumb and forefinger is a very common place for lymphedema to settle. The pain can be relieved by therapy that addresses that area, and you can learn to keep the swelling and pain down yourself. On the Lymphedema forum there's a woman named "Kira" who has exactly that kind of lymphedema. You might want to PM her or just post any question you might have on the Lymphedema board.

    Be well!
    Binney

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  • Galsal
    Galsal Member Posts: 1,886
    edited March 2012

    sending you private message TAG.

    Sally

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  • theyaregone
    theyaregone Member Posts: 52
    edited March 2012

    Thanx Binney I will go check it out.

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  • Neeners815
    Neeners815 Member Posts: 358
    edited March 2012

    Hello, I am new to this site (just diagnosed yesterday) and read through your thread.  I hope you know that your story, progress, attitude, etc. has been an inspiration to me today.  Thank you!

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  • theyaregone
    theyaregone Member Posts: 52
    edited March 2012

    Aww Neeners thanx so much.  Sending positive thoughts your way.  Keep us all up to date on how you are doing.  These ladies are amazing here.

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  • theyaregone
    theyaregone Member Posts: 52
    edited March 2012

    Bored out of my skull here.  What's everyone up to?

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  • Myleftboob
    Myleftboob Member Posts: 1,469
    edited March 2012

    Hey TAG

    Me too!!  Just had chemo on Friday and am taking advantage of the end of the steroids to get things done around the house.  Cooking, laundry, groceries.  Getting what's left of my hair buzzed off tomorrow.  Sick of hair around the house and in my food too LOL!!  It was a nice day here today though so got out and walked around the yard a bit picking up bits of stuff then tend to get stuck under the snow after winter. 

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  • theyaregone
    theyaregone Member Posts: 52
    edited March 2012

    So good to hear from you MLB.  I just saw the TLC catalog of wigs.  I didn't lose hair but I am tempted to buy a couple just because they are awesome and I am chicken to get my haircut!  Sort of like my FOOBS, I can be high, low big or small...I am woman, watch me change!!!!

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  • Myleftboob
    Myleftboob Member Posts: 1,469
    edited March 2012

    TAG

    Forgive me if you've already stated it here, I just forget.  Are you going to be doing chemo as well? 

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  • Galsal
    Galsal Member Posts: 1,886
    edited March 2012

    Love this one "I am woman, watch me change!!".  You sound SO much better!

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  • theyaregone
    theyaregone Member Posts: 52
    edited March 2012

    MLB - nope no chemo or radiation or anything.  I am clear.

    Gal - I do feel better.  I don't know why but I have found some sort of inner peace with it all.  I think it has a lot to do with getting on my knees before bed.

    Alright gals, get your minds out of the gutter......Embarassed

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  • Myleftboob
    Myleftboob Member Posts: 1,469
    edited March 2012

    Hi TAG

    I wasn't sure, good for you!  Love the line about being on your knees LOL LOL!!

    Just woke from a nap, had my 2nd chemo TX last Friday and while no other real complaints, just super tired from the wear off of the steroid buzz really.  My energy should start to improve from here though if last time is any indication.  2 down, 2 to go!

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  • DocBabs
    DocBabs Member Posts: 775
    edited March 2012

    TAG, I didn't really look at the forum when I answered your initial post and I have been wondering how you've been doing. So glad that I found you and that things are on a more positive note for you.It's amazing what time will do for your mind and body. I did want to refer to one post where you said that you went to a support group and you were the only one to speak,don't stop talking. Those women are there because they need to be there and thery're scared.They need to open up and with your help they will.Hope your fingers heal up, whatever the heck is wrong with them!

    Barbara

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  • Snoopsmom
    Snoopsmom Member Posts: 119
    edited March 2012

    Hello, TAG...from another female Vet! I was Navy..how about you? I've been following your story here on this thread. I must say my heart broke for you after reading your first few posts, but WOW...you sound so much better! We vets are a strong bunch, hey? I too am a widow, but it's been 20 years for me so the rawness is long gone.

    One of my sisters lives in Windham, Maine....it's a beautiful state but I can understand your solitude if you live up in the "wilder" parts! 

    Keep up your fightin' spirit!

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  • miricurt538
    miricurt538 Member Posts: 73
    edited March 2012

    To all the ladies who have gone right along on this journey wit TAG:  In fact, I am sure she will agree that you carried her part of the way when she was really down.  It is such a verification of human goodness and love to see what is written on this thread.(and others)  TAG, I hear such a growth in your wordsand attitude.  Can you see how far you have come and how you have grown?  With the help of these wonderful ladiesw you have taken something like BC and used it to become a better and stronger person.  I believe strongly that it isn't what happens to us that is the most important thing, but what we let it do to us and what we do with it!  You can be proud of yourself and your strength and know now that you can handle whatever comes along.  God bless you!    Love Joyce

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  • secondchancetoo
    secondchancetoo Member Posts: 50
    edited March 2012

    My heart does go out to you, as I myself, am in a similar situation.  I am also from northern Maine! I had a single mastectomy, with an attempt for reconstruction, with expanders that was not a success due to infection/necrosis, so I made the decision to have it removed.  My 2 oldest children are estranged from me, and do not know of my diagnosis.  I am also divorced.  I had been dating a man right before my diagnosis, but this put a strain on our budding relationship, although we are trying to work things out..  Please know that you are not alone....... so many of us are in this big boat, that I am sure we would rather not have gotten into!

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  • Galsal
    Galsal Member Posts: 1,886
    edited March 2012

    TAG, great to hear you're feeling better! 

    Snoopsmon, YES we Female Vets ARE a strong bunch!  

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  • Snoopsmom
    Snoopsmom Member Posts: 119
    edited March 2012
    Galsal, what were you in?
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  • Galsal
    Galsal Member Posts: 1,886
    edited March 2012

    Army!  Worked as a Legal NCO most of the time although I also drove BOATS for about 3yrs.  LCM8 to be specific.  Now THAT was the most FUN job I had in 15 yrs during my time in the Army!

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  • Snoopsmom
    Snoopsmom Member Posts: 119
    edited March 2012

    Galsal - I was an Intelligence Officer, only in for 7 years but they were the best years of my life! I'm SO glad I had the opportunity to serve.

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  • Rubes79
    Rubes79 Member Posts: 2
    edited March 2012

    I would be willing to talk with you anytime. You can email me rubiicross@gmail.com. I was diagnosed on Friday January 13th, 2012 and I had my bilateral mastectomy with expander placement at the same time. I am 32 years old, and have no family history. I have found comfort in having faith that GOD will pull me through this. If you email me your number, I can reply with my contact information. I will keep you in my prayers.

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  • mikita5
    mikita5 Member Posts: 373
    edited March 2012

    miricurt: Hey, we're (almost) neighbors.....I'm in WV

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  • miricurt538
    miricurt538 Member Posts: 73
    edited March 2012

    Hi Mikita,  Thanks for the Hello!  Are you guys having spring in WV?  It is so pretty here with the redbuds and dogwoods, etc.  I was born in Miss. but love it up here in the mountains.

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  • Circles
    Circles Member Posts: 133
    edited April 2012

    Hi TAG and friends!  Sorry I have been gone for so long.  We are rennovating another rental house and I have been busy helping hubby.  On Friday the 13th (lol) I had my expander removed and recieved my implant.  It looks really wierd.  I hope it gets to looking better.  I am recovering from the surgery today so I thought I woud check in on you guys.  Miss you all! 

     In an odd way not coming here was almost a way to forget about the cancer...  I hope you understand.  But I will be back to check on everyone--especially my TAG who I have become so fond of.  :)

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  • Moonflwr912
    Moonflwr912 Member Posts: 6,856
    edited April 2012

    Congrats on your Exchange, I hear they settle down and look better in about three weeks. Good luck. Tag, hope you are doing well too.

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