Calling all TNs

Inmate, What area did they biopsy?

Heiditoo and Linda......you are so right.  i did not think about MBJ and her feelings when I posted my update.  in fact, i didn't consider any one's emotions on this very difficult day.  i am so sorry.  Susan and Laurajane were so good at keeping advice and updates on their own journies upbeat and hopeful.  i miss that very much right now!  Once I let this all soak in I will strive to more helpful and hopeful.  just not today.

now i will try to sleep.   

Inmate - Please don't even think about not updating us, even on the worst day here.  We just don't want you or anyone else to think they can't talk, no matter what is going on.  Each and everyone of our cases is important, on every single day.  Please don't ever think that you disturbed anyone by your update, absolutely not.  I think what Heidi meant was the two deaths that have occurred, might be too much for MBJ to take.  She did not mean your update.  In fact we forgot to ask you for your results, as we got so engrossed by the bad news, one after another.  I think we are all mourning so badly right now as we are all in shock and have so much fear for our own selves.

inmate-even laurajane and susan had their freak out days. you have an amazing personality and please just continue to say how you feel! You are always helpful. And please know I am basically down the street from you, if you need anything! Things are slowing down a bit with my classes as I only have a couple of weeks left and no major finals-yipee-only papers. I have radiation every day at 10:15 so if you are ever at swedish around that time just stop on in! I got a pm from blondelawyer and it sounds like she has some very fun sunny trips planned with her friends, I am excited for her.

I agree lovelyface, did you see lj's work facebook page? It showed more of her amazing work.

I can't seem to stay away from the boards right now. I know we are all hurting. I hope they knew how much they were loved and appreciated. Just like I appreciate everyone of you! Titan, you started such a great thing with this triple neg thread! It's like a cyber home with all our sisters. I know, I am feeling a bit clingy right now.

Inmate up early and thinking of you. Don't apologize...you ned to be free to tell us what is happening. Your worries are our worries.

I never had a picture of Susan but she was a young petite beautiful small short haired ( aren't we all) vivacious woman with a strong but playful voice,who was ready to tackle anything. Even last summer before she had a stage 4 diagnosis, she was making books of memories and pictures for her children. She had a very practical side to  her that said hope for the best but prepare for the worst. When I met her one day she had gotten all her legal paperwork, last wishes and life insurance policies in order. I started crying and she was upset she upset me. I just was amazed that she could do all those things so that her husband would not have to worry about any of unfinished details. So thoughtful and considerate of everyone.

Plus she liked cheesecake!

Thanks for sharing that look into Susan's personality, Painting.  I really appreciate it.    Inmate, please keep posting how you are doing.  We care about you and wnat you to find comfort here. To any newbies that have posted or may be lurking,  please come here often.  Our little TN corner of BCO has taken a terrible loss over the past few days....and we are hurting and helping each other to heal.  So, don't be afraid to join us.  You will find information,  compassion and strength for your BC journey from all of the gals here.

Inmate - Please don't stop posting, and don't curb anything you want to say.  Just as everyone else has said we are here for you.  The only thing you have to strive to do is kick this F**KIN C's A**!!!! 

Sending you lots of prayers and positive vibes, your going to get thru this!! 

Inmate: Thinking of you today, and hoping for the best. Always love reading your posts. 

Inmate- ALWAYS post what you are feeling! That's what we are here for; to support as best we can in this somewhat limited online venue.

In fact, being somewhat obtuse at times, I didn't even *think* about the impact of your posts on MBJ until I saw LRM's post with my name in it. 

I was referring to the recent deaths, and how emotionally devastating they could potentially be to MBJ.

Gotta run... time to get the old boobs crushed.

Good morning ladies. I had a rough time sleeping last night. I thought alot about LJ and Suze and I too wondered what dear Susan looked like. Thanks Painting for your description.

 I know it sounds selfish, but when I hear about another sister lost, I immediately go to my dark place and think "what if it was me...", but I think we probably all have that fear and it is very normal and that is why we are all here- to help ease the anxiety.

Inmate- I will be thinking of you today. Sending you a big hug!

Good thing for the day- the kids are on Spring Break this week and today we are going shopping for my DH's birthday tomorrow- will probably get some ice cream along the way!

Sorry for the rambling- is it too early for a nap?? LOL!!

{{Inmate}} Good luck today!

Tif:

It's not selfish at all.  We all do it.  "There but for the grace of God......" is the mantra of each of us on this board.  Comes with the diagnose.

L.

Honestly, I didn't sleep very well either.  I had some dreams revolving around LJ and Susan.  In the light of day I can see them both zipping around in expensive heels and little sports cars. 

Swiftbird, hubby and I don't have children, sadly it took BC for me to realize I am hubby's entire life, I do worry more about him, my main goal in life is to get us moved back up to Pennsylvania where we can be near family.  I do try to share everything with him but sharing our loss this week and some of my fears is so hard on him that I don't want him to make himself sick worrying.  It's why I choose to stay on this board, so I can be with all of you, we all just "get it" and I don't have to explain myself. 

Tifj, I don't think your being selfish at all, I think it's very normal for us too.  BC has changed us and now we are all a little different, not only do we grieve hard but now we worry just as hard too.

Thank you Titan for this thread!

Checking in from my trip to England - visiting with my Mum at the moment. So sad and shocked to hear about LJ and Susan. Inmate - hoping for the best of news for you.

As we all know, we have other TNs who are now stage IV who will continue to need our support - Jenn from my chemo thread, MJB, Becca and blondelawyer immediately spring to mind.

In keeping with LJ, the best thing that happened today was to go shopping with my mother and buy her a new coat for mothers day which is Sunday here. We have talked and talked since I arrived. I generally only see her once a year so it's good to be able to make the most of family time. With the deaths of LJ and Susan, we are reminded to enjoy the time we have with our families.