Has anyone started a Dec 2011 group?

I start Taxol next week and my MO told me its not as bad as AC. I'm hanging onto those words. Not sure I could handle anything like AC again. But the steroids scare the crap out of me too. We shall see.



Although I have not heard the words "buck up" I did get a call from my SIL asking me to go to NYC for a weekend to celebrate my brothers birthday. When I said there is no freaking way that is possible she seemed annoyed. Really? Grrrrr.

Why don't you guys get the Neulasta in your stomach? It supposedly doesn't hurt as bad.



My support system is weird. People who I thought were just acquaintances have stepped up to do wonderful things for our family. And yet, 2 of my life long best friends haven't even really helped at all. I guess they can't deal with it. My husband has been pretty good through this. He's trying to be supportive and helpful, but it's stressful for him too. He's 16 years older than me and I bet he never thought this would happen. But he's a great dad and that's what we need right now!

Gracie..at least you made it there and had a pretty good time till the end..it's the fatigue and emotions it does just take over sometimes..I feel the same way I just can bust a cry at anytime, but it has gotten better as I move along...and see a light at the end of this terribly dark tunnel!!!

Gracie sorry that happened! That happened to me last week at my daughters bday party. I was fine most of the night but suddenly broke out in tears over practically nothing. Thank goodness it was just family so they understood. I half blame menopause symptoms for that.



Seacret I understand isolating yourself. I'm kind of a homebody anyways so this has just exasperated that.I'm going to force myself to do something fun this week.

I have a dry nose and watery eyes. So, a little bit of both. No spontaneous crying yet but I'm sure it's on the horizon.



Happy thoughts to all.

Hi all..just checking in.  Day 4 from TCH and I feel pretty good, just some aches that are controlled by Tylenol and fatigue that hits me pretty hard at times.  Hope everyone is doing well and enjoy what little is left of the weekend!

Yay Kelly glad to hear you are doing pretty good!



I haven't noticed dry eyes on Taxotere/carboplatin. My nose is very dry though.

It seems like the Sunday after my Wednesday treatment is the worst for me emotionally. I just can't seem to see a silver lining. I look at myself less one breast, no hair and at times no energy and I just want to cry. But I don't. I don't cause I don't like to feel sorry for myself as I know there are others in worse positions. I miss my boys, they are here, but I am emotionally not in the same carefree spot so it just isn't the same. I want to go back to who we were before but I know that isn't possible. Thankfully I can read of others that are on the other side and that gives me hope. My boys were my number one priority along with my husband and although I am here with them I just have all that other stuff in my head clogging my ability to focus and see that things are only temporary and will get better. God pls help me through.

{{HUGS!!!}} to everyone who's been feeling down. I had a crying spell this evening though it was pretty short. My parents took me out to dinner for my birthday, and when I went to the ladies room, they were playing 80s music. Well, I heard the first few notes of the next song and realized it was an old Air Supply tune (okay - complete sap confession - I was a total fan), and I just started to bawl. I guess mine was more of a reality moment - here I am, celebrating my birthday having gone through all this. I know there's a long way still to go, but I'm thankful to be here and hopefully on the road to recovery. I want to celebrate a lot more birthdays.

Whatashocker - Don't think of it as feeling sorry for yourself. We can't change the fact that this is happening to us, and we have to take care of ourselves. That means sometimes realizing that it all stinks and it's not fair - remembering that others have their own challenges is a good way of putting it in perspective, but doesn't diminish what we're going through in our lives. I hope you feel better this week.

I definitely have gotten the post-nasal drip SE and nothing seems to work. Had to choke back coughs during today's performance. But I made it through all six shows, so I'm happy. We'll see what happens with tx #3 on Thursday. 

Rachel..so glad you had a good birthday with the exception..of the short "moment" I understand..i have them myself..So I gotta ask..was it "here I am"....I have a little Air Supply Trivia for you!  The writer of the song "Here I Am" is from the town where I live..his name is Norman Saleet..when he was a teenager he lived in the same neighborhood as my dad's family and had the biggest crush on my Aunt..but growing up he was a bit of a "momma's boy" and my aunt couldn't take it when his mom would yell very loud in the neighborhood..."Norman..it's time to come home to take your bath!"..thought it was pretty funny!

Whata...I have the same exact issue..but I am as dry as the sahara desert inside and out...my skin, mouth, lips, face, throat, everything..it was way worse this time #3 than the last two..Ugh..I've drank so much water..still no releif!

Hang in there!

Heather

Rachel - I'm happy you had a nice dinner out, except for you Air Supply moment.  It seems any song I listen to lately on my IPod reminds me I have cancer, sometimes I wonder if I will ever be able to listen to music again.

Whata - I hope you're feeling a little better today.  I can relate somewhat.  I went to visit my Granddaughter yesterday (she's almost 3) and it's been so long since I've been able to run around and play with her like I used to, she doesn't even ask me to play with her anymore.  It just breaks my heart.  I can't wait to get off this chemo ride and get back to normal.

For everyone with dry skin that has changed during chemo, I called my sister in Denver who has a friend who is a dermatologist and her friend recommended (both by Cetaphil) Restoraderm Body Wash to wash my face and Restoraderm skin restoring moisturizer which have both really helped with the dry skin.  And the kicker, she told me to use Ponds Cold Cream at night as a face cleanser.  She said not to use water to wash it off, but to use 100% cotton squares to clean it off, then use the Restoraderm moisturizer after that on my face and neck.  My skin is so soft I can't believe it.

 My eyes and nose will not stop running.  My onc says the runny eyes is from the Taxetore and the runny nose is from the Cytoxin.  I've been though more boxes of tissues than I can count! 

I've lost a little of the water retention I had this last weekend.  I can start to see my ankle bones again, so yay!  My 3rd TX is Friday, this is supposed to be my good week, but with the water retention and my emotional status I haven't been able to enjoy it.  And if one more person tells me that I'm half way done I may have to hurt them.

Okay, rant over, on to better days! 

Kelly, hang in there! It has to be the timing from our last treatment and the weather. I think we are pretty much on the same days. The mental and physical exhaustion all at the same time is the hard part. On top of that you are working! I am not working and my first week after has been getting tougher. I guess it is true what they say that it is cumulative. Can you take some time off and treat yourself? Maybe a massage or a trip to the acupuncturist? You will get through tonight with a good nights sleep and feel better tomorrow. But take some time for yourself. The ladies working through this deserve some downtime. The first 2 treatments werent bad at all but I do notice now I am staying tired for longer. My restful thoughts are with you Kelly. Here is to a better day tomorrow.

Hi all - just wanted to check in and share in the commiseration... I had tx #2 of TAC last Wed and I'm so tired I can barely see straight. I'm very lucky to have a supportive husband, but with 4 young kids we still have to tag-team even on my worst days just to handle what they need. Part of me wishes I could take a mini-vacation after each treatment to recuperate... of course, then I would miss them terribly and be miserable.... can you tell I'm just rambling??  I am trying to focus on the temporary nature of our current struggle, but my heart breaks when I feel like I'm too tired or grouchy to be the kind of mom I want to be -- and my kids are really too young to understand. Again, my husband is a great dad, but even on his best days he isn't the most patient.  OK - enough feeling sorry for myself - honestly I've been so fortunate that my kids have been rolling with things pretty well - talking about their feelings and their teachers say they are sharing their feelings in school and seem to be doing well with everything. I need to focus on the positive and know that we'll get through it and all be stronger for it...

So the port is not infected, just irritated.  I had an emotional meltdown for my MO today.  It's so hard to remember a time when I felt really good.  And I did feel really good before I found that damn lump!  Now I realize that I have days where I feel pretty good, but not great because cancer is always in the back of my mind, even on my best days.  I hate this!  I have a scan scheduled in another week and a half and it will determine my course.....if we continue with the current regimen or change and try something else.  I had lung nodules so now I am anxious and worried about whether or not they have changed.  I don't want to change plans in the middle.  I know this is just a small string of bad emotional days and I realize how lucky I have been so far with the SE's. I don't want to have to start all over!

For now I am just going to concentrate on getting over this last treatment.  Thanks for letting me vent too... 

Rachelslife..I struggle taking care of one 5 year old..I can't even imagine 4..what I found is if someone offered to do anything or want to know how they can help..I take advantage of it..it was difficult for me at first to let people help, because I have always been so independent with everything even as a kid that I really struggled...but, i finally thought folks really do want to help and they don't know what they can do..tell them what you need...if it's a break for awhile from the kids..or a meal..whatever..typically when folks offer to help it isn't an empty offer..normally..hang in there..I have really struggled with patience myself through all of this, but there will be a time when I feel a little more like myself...Hugs to you and hoping for some feeling good days soon.

Kelly..sending prayers and positive energy that you won't have to change course in the middle..I feel the same way as you do..I can't remember when i felt not tired or worn out..I know it was in September before dx, but it sure feels like forever ago..

tiedyemom...Happy Birthday..hope you have a great family night!  Enjoy!