how about drinking?

I am soooo tired and even though its 10:30 in florida, my body is still on Denver time so 8:30...but I did get up at 4:30 this morning.....House is so HOT...not sure the open window is doing much...Mom has big wood blinds..will open them a little more, but have a feeling I will roast....mom is exhausted tonight....she was falling asleep before 8...and she was annoyed with dad....he is soooo stubborn...he was in bed complaining he was cold, but wouldn't use the electric blanket....I told him that the thermostat was at 80 and I wouldn't let mom put it higher or I would go stay in a hotel...he said, "no you wouldnt"......MY is so torn.....part of her wants to "place" dad, then part of her doesn't feel he needs it....also $ is a big issue....they couldn't afford the 2 - 3 K/month that assisted living would cost...I told Mom that I thought Dad was pretty much the same as the end of June except he was cold more and she asked me if I thought that was good or bad!!!!  Of course its good as it means he hasn't really declined....but he really has no memory...plus he is a guy and doesn't pay attention!!!!  great combination....I've really seen mom slow down...she walks so much slower....everything is a production!!!!  she is just so overwhelmed....I said take the doctor's advice who keep asking if she has help and she goes help to do what, cleaning?  I told her no...helping bathe dad, being home when he gets back from "senior" care so she doesn' t have to worry about being home right at 3 or 3:15...they provide transportation, but depending how many people are on the bus and the route that day, dad can get home anywhere between 3:30 or so and 5...today it was after 4:15....and someone has to be home to meet the bus...dad hasn't driven for many years so mom is the one who has to take him to all his doctor appts...Mom loves her counselor and finds her helpful, but yet says she needs more....she keeps looking at all sorts of info from the senior program and anything else she is given...but if its far she doesn't want to drive....I told her she needs to try the care giver support group and other support they have at the senior center.....she showed me something on Reiki and wondered if she would like it....tried to explain that is something that is very personal and those who go love it...so she asked me how I knew that and I just said, they wouldn't go if they didn't like it.....counselor is recommmending that Mom try a different anti-depressant as what she is taking isn't working (I agree)....mom keeps saying, I never thought life would be like this and commented today that the past year has been a nightmare!!! She is really torn on what she wants and doesn't know how to make the decisions...she is really stuck.....I tried asking her questions today...such as what if she "placed" dad for a couple weeks respite and he didn't want to come home....what would she do....what about paying for it.....how would she feel if he wasn't around to do things with as she does enjoy his company and she said not that much anymore....I know mom loves dad and cares alot for him but its too much for her....But mom has always enabled dad and "taken" care off him even when he was capable of doing so as she said it was easier than arguing with him....now he can't do as much....today when he came home, he went into the Florida room and then asked mom to get him a drink and she kept looking at me annoyed as why he didn't get it for himself....because she ususally does it and has for years!!!!  I know she is glad I'm here, but then again, her tolerance for dad is worse because he acts different around me.....I'm glad that I'm here, but sure wish they were closer.....and the chances of my parents leaving south Florida are slim to none...there is nothing in Denver except for me and my DH and kids and they don't like the cold and snow...they've had a good life here, have good friends and there is lots to do where they live (retirement community).......but mom is doing it all alone!!!!

Some one asked in a post if my psychiatrist knows how I feel about the therapy....yes, yes, yes,,,,she knows that I am frustrated with it all...the meds, therapy and not being where I want to be.....I haven't gone off meds cold trukey...well I guess I did, but it was with her direction with the prozac......I need to change my therapy appt that is next thursday as I got asked to do a health fair for Komen...keep forgetting to call the therapist.....guess I should just call now and leave a message.......I wish I knew the therapists email addy as that would be so much easier!!!!

SIL called dH this evening....SIL told him that there is a Toronto/Columbus hockey game the day they arrive in Columbus (next Thursday) and DD and SIL had called grandma (MIL) to see if she wanted to go to the game and she said yes...so SIL called DH to tell him that his mother loves sports (I didn't know that after knowing her 35 years)....DH said she watches sports on TV...so SIL, DD#1, DH and MIL are all going to a hockey game next Thursday afternoon.  I have a great SIL....and it will be nice for DH and his mom to do something other than talk about memories or take her shopping.  DD#2 and I don't get into Columbus until almost midnight Th......My SIL is a sports nut....but more important, he is a very sweet guy and family is very important to him....DD is lucky.

 The petit shiraz that PANTS is pouring is delicious!!! now if I only had a glass in real time...

Thanks sistas for letting me rant and rave.....and I'm thinking of journaling her on the computer....would do it on word....and once I print off a page, I would delete the document...that should be fine.....I could also just save it on a flash drive...would get a new one just for the journal...it seems like when I'm in the mood, I can write forever here...pen and paper just seems harder....or is it just an avoidance!!!!!

Waiting to talk to DD#2 and DH....DD#2 leaves tomorrow morning for NJ...we both get home Monday....I get in 2 hours before her...at first I thought it was only 1 1/2 hours and was just going to hang out at the airport so we didn't get home and turn around again...but now thinking I'll have DH pick me up, then I'll go back and get DD......but I don't have to decide till Sunday night....but if I do that I wouldn't have time to meet her at the gate which is what I ususally do when she travels alone as I want to give her a welcome home hug, but she is okay with meeting at passenger pick up...she is quite the traveller!!!

Sweet dreams.....

Wow, so very beautiful!!! Looks so much like it could be a current photo.....so many times the hair or clothes date the photos, but your beauty and the beautiful gown could pass for being taken today! Even the pic of you 3 on the bridge looks like a current photo would look. I am not surprised you wish you had more photos, as these are gorgeous!!! WTG Gail!

Karen, I sent you a PM....so hard dealing with the problems your parents are having. And then not having any LIKKER!!! I think I would have stashed some in the luggage, but I think you only brought carry-ons? Hang in there, hoping you can come up with a good solution while you are there.

Going nighty-night......hugsssssss to all you luvly ladeezzzz....

Kathy

Gail, you are beautiful and I love the dress and your head piece too. I also hope that my DD will wear my wedding dress. It has been hanging in my closet for 21 years and also is not dated. I was 115 lbs back then. The only plus for me in gaining weight, is that my face fills out. i liked my face best when I was pregant lol.  When you take your next break from costume making, billing etc, will you join me for a night cap?  It is lonely here in the lounge. Where are the rest of my west coast gals? I have to hang a bit because I have a gentle load of laundry that I just put in the dryer so I have to partAY jest a weeee bit longer.

Karen, it is unbelievable what you are going through. I can not imagine. I thought my parents situation was bad until reading your posts. You poor girl, I haven't the words to express how bad I feel for you. I wish I could say something profound to help you. All I can say is that my parents situation is quite similar, just reversed (mom has the dementia).. Perhaps we can talk more on the forum that Kathy mentioned? You need a lot of support. I am here for you if you ever want to vent via PM. and do not apologize for venting. Speaking for the others, we have all needed to vent at one time or another and this forum is not just about drinking, it is about the sisterly bond we all share. Hang in there and know I will be praying for you.  I am going to pop into the HTL chapel and pray now for better days, a decent stay and comfort  in that sauna you are stuck in. Love you and know that many of us feel your pain....

 Off to the chapel....gotz lotsa praying to do.

Hey Bernie, that is a great theory and one that we follow here when we have a DOTD with juice or fruit in it!

Kymn, I hope you are at the CLUB and SPADE!

Kathy, glad you asked about the "daleks", I was afraid to ask at the risk of looking ......well, you know. Bummer about the trees, but I'm sure the beavers didn't realize what they were doing! I wish I could get a different pic on my drivers license, but it isn't due to expire until like 2023!

LOL.........love your wine Allison, can we all have some? You really should share! Hate that you and DorK are in such pain. Hoping and praying for it to go away SOON!

Karen, glad you had a safe trip. I do not think you were rude to the passenger next to you. Sometimes they will make those people pay for a second seat. Oh my, that is so scary about your moms driving. It is so hard to see our parents failing and pray that you make the right choices in what to do. But I think I would INSIST on taking the shuttle to the airport upon your departure.

Oh Gail...............gorgeous pictures! I am glad they are huge! Thank you for sharing.

DorK, you said it poifectly about our thread and the support we have for each other, besides the drinking and fun.

Allison, you can just copy/paste pictures from FB to here. But it doesn't work with Firefox and not sure about phones. Otherwise, you have to have a photobucket, picasa, or similar online account.

Cheers to SASSY BITCHES and GENTLEMEN JOCKS! (I know, was supposed to be Jack)

HI ladies, Karen am really feeling for you right now, I am proud of you typing so much here lately, I know whats its like to just want to keep everything inside am kind of still in that phase but I know you have been going through some pretty tough times and to see you open up like this ...well lets just say it gives me hope that I too will get better at leaing on people. Right now I just feel so much sadness all the time and even though I am doing everything I need to at the moment, it just doesnt feel good. I am proud of you.Gail you look truly beautiful, what a lucky man your DH is.Dorothy ,Kathy ,Goldie and NM the words of compfort and love that you all share with me mean more to me than I could ever express properly. I dont know if I show it but I love you all so much.

Have a great weekend all, I am going to carve pumpkins with my daughter as my son is up in Edmonton at a Foo Fighters concert with his dad

Hugs to you all

Kymn

Wahine-None of us can be getting older, can we? Isn't part of the rat ba$tard deal that we don't age after diagnosis? Jeesh, seems like we should get something like that out of the whole mess! Speaking of "medical vibrating devices" that's what we use to use to do chest physical therapy on the preemie babies in the Neonatal Unit I used to work in. Enough vibration to loosen up secretions, not so much as to harm the wee ones, but the looks on the Physical Therapists' faces sometimes were priceless!

Scuba-wifi in the doc's office can't be a good sign! Still, it's nice to have if you have to wait a long time. Waiting is annoying, but if the doc spends all the time I need with me when I get it I can live with it.

Bernie-We got through the same thing here when we go into or out of Daylight Savings Time. I forget which way we go when. Not even sure why we do it anymore. Still get up in the dark and come home from work in the dark in the winter. Lots of Seasonal Affective Disorder, which translates to lots of drinking in the winter. Hmm, I need to come up with a good excuse for drinking in the summer, too!

Kymn-LMAO! Too funny! Raising a glass to your humor!

DorK-We'll have the Tenders print out the posts, seal them in plastic and post on your shower wall so you can read while you enjoy the warm water! Hasn't someone invented a computer or computer screen yet that is waterproof and can be mounted on the shower wall? Seems like technology has to have come at least that far.

Juliet-Good idea about the Daleks! The can be back up for DorK's "people" when things get busy!

Wahine-to me the Daleks look like oversize salt shakers. The have a mechanical voice, "Exterminate" is their favorite word, and mission-to exterminate all human beings so mechanical things can take over the universe for all time. The Doctor has what I think is called a Call Box in Britian (some help here Bernie?) and what we in the US call a Phone Booth. It's called the Tardis, and it's bigger on the inside than the outside, travels through time and space, sometimes both simultaneously, but usually just back in time on Earth. The TV series on SyFy "Torchwood" is a spin off of Dr. Who. It's one of the longest running shows going, started out in black and white. The Doctor usually has a side-kick who is usually a young, attractive female. Sarah Jane Smith was one long running side kick, and there is/was a spin off show called the Sarah Smith Chronicles for a while. Not sure it's still on, haven't seen it mentioned anywhere lately. Dr. Who has quite a cult following (not sure if I should admit to being one of those followers or not!).

a couple of the Doctors: Sarah Jane with one of the Doctors: Sarah Jane, grown up with her own show:

Mrs. Vino-Did I read earlier that this was your last chemo? If I'm wrong (not sure how that could happen, but who knows these days!) next time you are going to get nuelasta tell your onc that the standard of care for neulasta is to put the patient on a 25 mcg/hr fentanyl patch at the time of the injection. The patch stays on for 72 hours, which gets most people past the worst of the neulasta pain, and hydrocodone or some other pain killer is also prescribed to use if the pain "breaks through" the patch and after the patch comes off. The steaks and wine sound yummy, hope you enjoyed!

Karen-I've sat next to large people when I've flown, and I've done the same thing with the armrest. I figure that unless the person offers to pay me for my seat space, I'm entitled to use the entire seat space I paid for, especially since they are small and cramped enough as it is! I do feel sorry for those people, though. Your Mom can get help at home with your Dad's care. Ask your Dad's doctor to make a home health referral, they'll come do and evaluation and help her get set up with available services. There are lots of services out there that people have been supporting with their taxes for years and years that aren't taken advantage of. Lots of people live with chronic kidney failure for decades. When the kidneys start to really stop working well the potassium level usually goes up, so if your Dad's potassium is low his kidneys are likely still pretty functional.

DorKy, dear, that is the percotini fountain, not the shower. . .

Karen-sounds like your Mom is already plugged into a lot of potential help. The trick is that she does have to accept the help. I'll tell you the same thing I tell the families of my patients in similar situations: People with dementia often feel better and do better in a setting where there is a consistent schedule for the day. Nursing homes with Alzheimer's or Dementia units use this fact and have daily routines that don't change, and the residents often thrive. It's not possible to maintain that kind of routine and schedule in a family home. Also, the caregivers are fresher because they aren't working 24/7 the way family caregivers do. Good idea to have your Dad try out one for a couple weeks respite. He probably won't want to leave once he gets accustomed to the routine. I know money is an issue, it always is. Facilities like that have intake workers or social workers who can help connect people with programs that may help with some of that, or at least explain the coverage situation clearly so you Mom will know exactly where things stand. I was the one who asked if your therapist knows how you feel about your progress, glad she does know. Don't worry about the rant, we all do it from time to time. Journaling on a specific flash drive sounds like a great idea! Portable, available and safe! Oh, look,. the Tenders found some flash drives that no one would even know was a flash drive, even safer!

AStorm-BEAUTIFUL!

DorK-I'll join you in the chapel, I've got lots to pray for, too. And to be thankful for.

Princess Glitter Sizzle decries today's DOTD is The Aging Parent Soother
1/2 oz Brandy
1/2 oz Triple Sec
1/2 oz Apple Brandy
1/2 (Juice of) Lemon
1 tsp Powdered Sugar

Directions
Shake all ingredients with ice, strain into a cocktail glass, and serve.

NM, Love the Maxine joke about turning back the clock to when she was 20. I second that!!! Funny (but glad it worked) about using vibrators on the neo-natal preemies. Hope you had generic looking ones and not "anatomically correct" ones....LOL. THose flash drives are beautiful!!! Great DOTD "The Aging Parent Soother". Lately I can't complain, my mom went with me all day, till I took her home at 2pm. She had a great time, but I couldn't get the bird to eat much at my DD's house, as he wasn't used to seeing her there. I always tell people their ages when we are out (usually when they aren't close enuf to hear), and everyone is impressed.

OK, it is only 3pm but I decided to have an ML in memory of our Junie! Here's to a great friend! And I am enjoying dwinking with Bernie and Scuby right now. Anyone else dwinking too???

Interesting about "Dr. Who"....I had heard the name, but never saw the show.

Kymn, YOU are doing amazingly well. Just getting thru ea day when you are very sad, is hard enough. It takes baby steps, and may take awhile, but just going through the motions will help, and someday (really!) you will notice you are able to be happy again. We can all see a big improvement, from when you first were hit with the devastating turn of events. Enjoy the pumpkin carving!!!!

Hugs to all, Lots to ketchup on, but need to get to some other stuff here.....

Cya latah, Hugssssssss,

Kathy

Karen, on the bright side, the flea market was probably air conditioned! Geeze, I would go bonkers in that hot house; you're a trooper!

Bernie, Kathy, Scuby, and anyone else in the lounge, I popped open an excellent Pinot noir about an hour ago (4:00 here)! Must be in the air. And guess what, Louisville got a Trader Joe's, and it opened this am @ 8:00! So excited! I ventured out and bought some wine, grocery line was to back of store, and had to get home to get DD off school bus. Wine line was more important line to wait in, Fo Sho! They had the opening on the news this morning, and one man actually spent night before on a cot outside!!!! Really??? Only in Kentucky, girls! Made me think of a tornado that went through here a few years back, and news reporter interviewed a woman, with like two teeth in her head, of course. She said, and I quote, "I looked out da window right about the same time Mrs. Margie's trailer lifted straight up off the ground, and alls I could think was, darnit, I believe she borrowed my casserole dish!" True story!! We do wear shoes here, BTW!!

Anyway, waiting for my friend to come over so I can do her nails in my illegal, cash only, nail salon. She's already called and asked me to have a glass of Vino ready for her, been a rough day!!

So cheers to all here, and those that aren't! Will check back in later, gonna find Pants and see if I can't get a neck massage....

Welcome Lilyn! Belly on up to the bar, Pants or Jock will be happy to serve you up whatever u want!

Allison, That is so FUNNY (too bad its true) about the woman being interviewed!!! I know, whenever they interview anyone from AL for the nat'l news, it is someone that looks and talks like such a backroads hick! Gives the wrong impression, thats for sure. COOL you got a Trader Joes...we love going to that store, but none here yet. Maybe soon??? Did you get any 2 BUCK CHUCK? Or maybe it is 3 buckx there. Pwetty good vino for da pwice. Wish you could do my nails too....I will stand in line behind DorK (we are so polite here...LOL). Lost all my nails recently as I have been doing so much painting, using bondo, etc. Just all broke off.....wonder why??? LOL.

Karen, continued (((HUGS))) for you, dear. So very hard to deal with. Very sad seeing our parents declining. Hope you can find some solutions for them!

DorK, OF COURSE I am here dwinking wid ya! Maybe you will even share the "Gentleman"...LOL.

Hi Lilyn! Good to see you here.

Me tinks me will meander into da casino.....gonna hit up the free ATM firstly...den put da moola in da machiney and win, win, winney!!!!  *ka-ching*

RRW

on my way to the craft store... gonna be a chicken... need rubber feet.

I'm still driving DDs car & its a little white Honda Civic so I want to make it look like an egg... which it kind of already does. Anyone know how to put a yolk on a car without ruining the paint?

Gail, that's great!! You will have post pics! My brother is going to show me how post here tomorrow, so look out ladies! Finished the pinot( with help) then moved on to a nice merlot, now a red zin. Yummmmmmy!!!! Just downloaded a cd from iTunes, Neko Case. First heard her song "wish I was the moon tonight" on one of my fave shows, True Blood. She is awesome. Check out that song on YouTube. So many times I wish I was the moon tonight. Hey bartender, hook a girl up!

What an amazing idea, Gail! Can you get yellow plastic at the fabric store, or a yellow dropcloth to cut into a circle and just tape (underneath the yolk) to the car? I dunno, must be something simpler. How are you gonna make your rubber feet???? GOTTA show us a pic when you are all dressed up, getting in (or in front of) the egg car (or egg car-ton....must weigh a ton, right? J/K).

Raquelle Leather Rock,  I was wondering the same ting my dern self, "how does one make rubber feet". Is there a book, "Wubber feet for dummies"...hahaha!! I am watching the World Series, hoping that St. Louis Wins.  My olny logic in my choice is that St. Louie peeple had a devastating year with tornadoes (as did other areas but ya see,, those teams are not in the world series). I felt the same when N'orleans won the super bowl - those poor locals deserved that job for their city after the devastation from hurricanw katrina.

Allison, can't wait to see your pics. Thanks for the awesome Vino-style manicure, that was nice. I think we have a salon and spa at the htl. Am I right about that? If not, let's add it, along with the music. I here our DJ playing Adele's "someone like you",, love that song!  Pants, wanna dance?

Claire, thanks for the warning but an inch of snow does not warrent boots, I prefer my sketchers!  But my boots are in my front closet and ready when needed.  FYI, I am fully stocked with knee high pantyhose. I have six pairs of black and five pairs of nude. Speaking of nude, anyone wanna jump in the tubby wa' ith Hunk? He is not nude but a gal can wish! Speakng of, me tinks me wishes me had  anudder dwink, I need to get lively so that it feels like fried-dey night, YEAH!!  Anyone still here???? To those in da house, rounds for all......dwink up, dere is plenty to go arownd!

   cHEeRZ

CheerZ!