Should I Be Worried? Best friend went "natural" route ...

Personally, I would give your friend a hug, wish her well and just keep being her friend.  She sounds like she thought long and hard and made an informed decision regarding her own health and how she wanted to treat her cancer.

Does her choice of not following standard western treatment with infected lymph nodes put her at a higher risk for metastisis?  Sure it does.  But she is willing to take that risk. But it is HER risk to take.   And you should respect that decision.

Just my humble opinion.  

I have a girlfriend who did exactly the same thing, but she was 55 at the time. The young age and positive lymph nodes don't bode well for your girlfriend. I wrote my girlfriend a letter just in case the ONLY info she was getting was from alternative sources rather than science ones then I would consider that she was better informed. Ultimately, the decisions are theirs and what they can and cannot handle, but I felt that a good friend would make sure she had all the information at hand anyways. MY girlfriend is in her 6th year of recovery (2.5 cm, high grade cancer, sentinal node +, ER/PR+) with just surgery. 4 out of 9 postive lymph nodes puts your friend in a more serious position (unlike have 1-3 nodes positive) but who knows for sure?! My only suggestion and I asked my girlfriend this too, is NOT to make recommendations that others do what she did. Sometimes, we can beat the odds.

Hi

I had a friend dx Feb 10  with Her2+ and postive nodes(she wouldn't say how many nor details of her path report other than grade 3). She refused all treatment other than mastectomy. Basically she was scared of having chemo despite my arguments for it. She just wouldn't talk about it.

She was dx with skin mets in April this year which quickly progressed. Still she refused treatment. She died in August. It had spread to her lungs and brain.

It's so sad, You have to respect their wishes but for my friend I can't help but think 'what if'.....

Mal 

I'll share with you what my radiation onc did.  There was a young woman in my clinic who was refusing all allopathic treatments.  He was worried, and told me about it.  I recommended I talk with her, and see if I could encourage her.  He told me in his years of practice, it is not worth the effort.  It made him sad, but the old "you can't change people" is true in these cases, too.

My aunt has a great friend who refused all treatment, and went from Stage 2 to 4 in a few years.  No one has the answers to stop all cancer, that is for danged sure.  Could she have been helped?  I believe statistically, yes.  She might have lengthened her life.  The stats seem to prove so.

Despite being super-frustrated at what I deem her arrogance and misguidedness, my aunt and I stand by her, and celebrate her independence and fortitude.  It takes all kinds of people and on some level, I'm grateful for that, even when I believe it is misguided.

It is impossible, as folks are indicating here, to give you hard answers, especially since we don't know the full profile.  Node positive patients, however, do have a higher chance of recurrence with and without treatment.  

One thing I think is important to clarify:  cancer is an elusive disease without cures or answers at this time in medical history.  One can never say they "cured" themselves naturally or otherwise.  Doctors are still trying to figure out why it happens--to pretend we have the answer is, in my mind, a disservice to the women who go through this disease.  

The hardest thing for me at work in the cancer center, is that somebody refuses treatment,when they can be treated. I have seen women that rather die than to have a mastectomy and or chemo. when there is not other option.

It is a personal choice,but I know the odds, is to have hair, more important than our life?

I am the one that explains and makes them sign that are refusing treatment and what are the risks.'

I have seen young women that they only need a mastectomy and radiation, or not even that. It is different from a person that plainly refuses treatment.

I would do anything  that will give me more time with my loved ones.

I have a friend who was diagnosed with node +, ER+ HER+ BC about 5 years ago.  She had a lumpectomy but refused chemo and rad because she was suspicious of the "medical establishment" and believes in alternative medicine.  Cancer recurred.  She went to an alternative medicine practitioner and started on numerous supplements and other treatments..  cancer has progressed and is now in her lungs.  She has now agreed to receiving chemo.  Can never know for sure if she was "curable" several years ago when initially diagnosed.  It is quite obvious, however, that she is  suffering more (trouble breathing, numerous pleural taps) now than she would have suffered had she received chemo/rads.  Very sad. 

beloved1234, I'm sorry to hear you're in this tough situation, especially with your mom's experience. Not sure if this is helpful, but there are caregiver support groups. Maybe it would help to go to one once to help feel connected. (I'm not a "support group" kind of person, so I've been surprised that's it's helped me feel less isolated, and sometimes even get good advice.) good luck and hope you're able to take care of yourself in this stressful time.

Moring....I think Elimar is right....It isn't going to do you any good to worry about your friend...  It sounds like she is determined to do just what she feels is best.  She must be scared to death to try chemo or any other treatments. 

Those two are standard treatments for node-positive cancer... I was also afraid to have chemo, & I thank God, I didn't really have to have it. 

My Daughter's older friend had a lumpectomy same time I did.  But she refused any further treatment, even with positive nodes.  During the next year, she went to see "John the god" in Brazil I think....He touts himself as being able to help cure ANYthing... But she wanted to believe he could cure her. 

So a year later, she now has mets to the bones, lungs, and she is just spiraling downward..... She is being aggressivively treated with chemo,  but she says it is too late.   She says it is God's will.  She says she has had a good life!  Her family is doing their best to figure out what to do next, because her hip just broke, & she doesn't know how that happened.   It just makes me want to cry, for her, and my Daughter who loves her and her Husband so much.

You know, there is nothing you can say to her, except be there for her.   It's just like dreaming said...There are sooo many treatments available to us, & to see or hear of someone turning their backs on them, is just not in their best interests! 

She could do them, and THEN keep on doing alternative meds, or whatever.  But they shouldn't take the place of standard treatments, which have proven to either save, or pro-long our lives.  It's just hard to stand back, and watch this happen to someone you care about...but I don't think there is nothing else you can do, except love her.