Chemo May 2011

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  • blondelawyer
    blondelawyer Member Posts: 327
    edited July 2011

    This is my week off and I have AC #3 next Monday.  My oncologist said that I'll either do 4 or 6 and man am I hoping for 4 after this last dose!  I feel nearly human today and was able to get quite a bit done.  I have PT tomorrow, which is scheduled too early fo rmy liking.  I need to NOT schedule things early in the morning.  Then I have art therapy.  It's amazing how the prospect of just a couple of appointments feels like a full day.  So much different than life as a full-time attorney!  But, we keep going, right?  I wrote myself a new job description for getting through cancer.  I can't figure out how to paste it here, but HERE is the url to my blog posting.  

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  • Patriotic
    Patriotic Member Posts: 281
    edited July 2011

    Hi everyone. It seems everyone is doing a bit better. I had a great weekend, visiting family and attending a pool party. It helped so much to get my mind off of this BC nightmare. And most people didn't ask me to talk at length about cancer, which I now despise.



    Taxol #10 today. For the first time, I wasn't really looking forward to it. But, it went fine. It always does. I am over the halfway mark. The fatigue is starting to set in. I agree with all of you; accomplishing little tasks seems much more monumental now. I am looking forward to being able to function normally again. We will all get there.



    2 more Taxol and then onto the AC beast! I am trying to schedule everything I need to, just in
    case the AC kicks my butt. Not gonna go down without a fight.





    Blonde lawyer, I hope you only need 4 cycles! Sending positive thoughts.



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  • Beaglesgirl
    Beaglesgirl Member Posts: 287
    edited July 2011

    I'm freaking out! I thought my tissue expanders were giving me grief a couple of days ago when I started to have discomfort under my arm ( cancer side) today after my shower it felt like a lump. Of course I think the worst. Left a message for my MO. I was confused about who to call BS, PS or onc. I decided to start with the big guy.



    :(

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  • DebRox
    DebRox Member Posts: 437
    edited July 2011

    Beaglesgirl, please don't stress, it may be scar tissue or even a swollen lymph node depending on location.  I know easier said than done.  Cancer brings out the hypocondriac in us now :(.

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  • Beaglesgirl
    Beaglesgirl Member Posts: 287
    edited July 2011

    Thank you DebRox, I got a call back from the nurse at my MO office. She said Dr. B wanted to see me Friday morning but that he thought that it may be an infection since it's causing pain.



    I did notice that my expectations from the process has really changed from when this has started. I have no expectation of swiftness... I guess I'm more patient than I was before. I need prayers that this is a swollen lymph node and I just need some antibiotics.

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  • bak94
    bak94 Member Posts: 1,846
    edited July 2011

    Beaglesgirl-praying that it is an infection, like the doctor suspects!

    Where is everyone? All must be well and everyone enjoying life! Going to see my doc this afternoon for my week after chemo checkup.

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  • neecee
    neecee Member Posts: 663
    edited July 2011

    bkj66 - I think everyone is either recovering from treatment this week, or enjoying a treatment free week!

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  • Cyborg
    Cyborg Member Posts: 848
    edited July 2011

    Last tx on ties. Nuelesta Wednesday . Feel weak and thrashed today.

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  • Patriotic
    Patriotic Member Posts: 281
    edited July 2011

    First week with no crushing headaches. Yippee. So, I am enjoying this beautiful weather and leaving tomorrow for a 4-day vacay with the family!! I hope to not have to think about BC at all over this time.



    Hoping all of you have a great and SE-free week.



    Cyborg, congrats to you!



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  • MamaV
    MamaV Member Posts: 907
    edited July 2011

    I am done! Finished last taxol today! Whoever said what doesn't kill you makes you stronger never had chemo. I finished but don't feel stronger!

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  • Patriotic
    Patriotic Member Posts: 281
    edited July 2011

    Congrats MamaV!!

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  • Beaglesgirl
    Beaglesgirl Member Posts: 287
    edited July 2011

    I am so happy for you MamaV!

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited July 2011

    Ladies - it's official, my husband is an ass.  Apparently, I should be ashamed of having breast cancer.  I have been in chemopause for the last two weeks, so the hot flashes are in full swing.  The wig gets hot and my bald scalp sweats!  Sometimes I wear scarves, sometimes wigs, sometimes nothing because I'm hot.  Anyhoo, I go outside to turn the water sprinklers off and he comes to the door and tells me to get in the house and asks me do I want the whole neighborhood to know I'm sick?  To which I responded, "I'm not quasimodo, I have cancer and it's not going to make me a victim.  Shut the hell up." 

    What the hell ladies?  Listen, if you have a good supportive man, you need to make sure you hug him every chance you get and thank God for him.

    Beaglesgirl, I am praying for your body to be healed.

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  • MamaV
    MamaV Member Posts: 907
    edited July 2011

    Marcy that is just wrong! Do not be ashamed. Find your support here! Hugs!

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  • blondelawyer
    blondelawyer Member Posts: 327
    edited July 2011

    I'm sorry Marcya, that was so insensitive!  I go out bald, with a scarf, with a wig, whatever depending on how I feel.  

    Beaglesgirl:  I hope that everything turns out fine!

    Bkj66:  How the appointment went well!

    I am finally feeling better, thank goodness!  Each day I feel a bit better, but that has me completely dreading Monday's chemo.  I am going to try to enjoy this weekend as much as I can because next week might be hell.   

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  • Patriotic
    Patriotic Member Posts: 281
    edited July 2011

    So sorry, Marcya. It's interesting that he has such an issue with it and you don't. If you feel like being bald, wearing a scarf or wig, it's your prerogative and yours alone. Honestly, I wish I had the confidence to do it. It's a shame that cancer still has a stigma attached, in some people's eyes. Maybe, he will come around after he understands how hurtful his comments were. Big hug.

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  • 40-years-old-now
    40-years-old-now Member Posts: 309
    edited July 2011

    I am very lucky I have a very supportive husband, because I am having trouble walking he has been doing everything cooking, cleaning, taking me to the doctors,  He even says that I have a beautiful shaped scull. :) 

    There is good men out there, I was lucky I found one about 20 years ago and married him almost 19 years ago.

    Oh my husband does have me cover my bald head because there is that nasty thing called a sun out there. (I am a red head an burned before, he now worries that I will combust in the sun) LOL

    My husband did have some problems with my shaved head but once I started loosing hair he was ok with it. We both still miss my long hair.

    Candice

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  • bak94
    bak94 Member Posts: 1,846
    edited July 2011

    Day at the doctor's office started out bad. I had to get blood drawn and no blood would come out of my port. Nurse said this happens sometimes. She kept trying to flush it and draw blood but nothing but a tiny bit of blood, I started to feel sick. I said why don't we try just using my hand (arm veins are bad) so she sent me to see someone else with port still accessed. New person tries to get vein in my hand and hit a nerve-hurt like crazy, now I am in tears. Now she says let me use your finger. Ok. She cuts my finger and gets blood, then my finger wouldn't stop bleeding-go figure! Now the nurse comes back and puts some kind of enzyme in my port, suppose to fix problem, problem gets worse-no blood and not able to flush. She says well, it might work by next week for treatment. Well. tonight the port feels harder than usual and kinda sore, not red though, more like fluid is sitting in the chamber thingy, so I am freaking out! So I need to call the office tomorrow to get back in so they can look at it. WIll I be all right tonight? I probably won't be able to sleep because I am worried about clots and stuff.

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  • bak94
    bak94 Member Posts: 1,846
    edited July 2011

    Macya, sorry your husband was being like that. Generally my hubby is very supportive, but he has a belief that really bothers me. He thinks if you truly believe you can beat cancer, that you will, and those that have died of this awful disease really didn't believe that they could get better. We go round and round this issue and I can not convince him that many positive women, who believed they could beat this disease, have died from this disease, many beautiful, positive women. So. if this disease gets me, he will think of me as a failure, causing the outcome because I didn't believe I could get well. I know being positive helps everything, possibly prolonging life, but it is not a cure, and I can't convince him of that.

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  • bak94
    bak94 Member Posts: 1,846
    edited July 2011

    Ok, now I'm on a posting frenzy! Found out my doc is recommending full hysterectomy rather than ooph because of brca1 status, ok, I can deal with that. He also recommends waiting at least a year before any type of reconstruction, he thinks that reconstruction can obscure a recurrence, and also wants to make sure it doesn't come back anywhere else for a year. At least he has decided he is for bmx, as long as surgeon agrees, but no boobs for over a year? I guess if it is my life or boobs. I will choose life.

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  • bak94
    bak94 Member Posts: 1,846
    edited July 2011

    Congrats MamaV and Cyborg! You did it!

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  • mccrimmon324
    mccrimmon324 Member Posts: 1,076
    edited July 2011

    Marcya, I'm so sorry your husband was being so insensitive, sometimes people say things without thinking.  I'm sure once his words and actions are brought to his attention he'll feel horrible.  My hubby is very supportive however he is also just as terrified as I am and trying to deal with everything in his own way.  When he gets upset, instead of showing those emotions he gets mad.  I can't begin to tell you how many times I've mentioned some random thing I'm worried about and he completely freaks out on me about how I just don't know how to be positive and I'm so negative and I'm never going to get better if I can't be positive blah blah blah, Bkj66 - totally understand what you mean!!  Sometimes I just walk away, sometimes I try to explain that this is happening to ME and I'M going to worry about everything and its NORMAL right now.  Just this morning I said to him I really really want to get a breast reduction in my good breast to even them out and he seemed annoyed - apparently if I go thru with the breast reduction its going to prolong my recovery and he just wants to get this overwith.  Really????  Doesn't he think I want this done and over with or better yet, just not happening!  I'm sorry I really didn't mean to start this post and rant!  I hope everyone is doing well.  Congrats to those who are finishing!! 

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  • Plils
    Plils Member Posts: 146
    edited July 2011

    Marcys,

    I am so sorry you have to deal with an Ass Hole husband, like you are not going through enough, hang in there you have US to help you get through this, I know all about the chemopause and my head is always hot, so I go bald at home all the time and I think everyone just got use to it, to tell you the truth I don't know how I would handle these hot flashes with hair.. Ha ha, my girlfriend said the other day that that is why we lose our hair during Chemo is because we get so hot.

    Just tell yours husband "bald is beautiful" and next time you two go out dont wear anything on your head and just smile....Ha ha

    Hang in there you have great support on here.

    Lots of hugs  Pam 

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  • Cyborg
    Cyborg Member Posts: 848
    edited July 2011

    Dear maryca. Hopefully you and your guy will get past that comment fast. Sorry that u got your feelings hurt. It's really weird that we have to worry about making others feel uncomfortable when we are going through tx. Maybe your guy will cone around--- and more than likely he is mostly great and wonderful.

    Bkj66--- geez! Getting poked to death!

    Congrats mamav! It's pretty anticlimactic for me and I am in tears and don't know why.

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  • bak94
    bak94 Member Posts: 1,846
    edited July 2011

    Cyborg, it's ok to be in tears, breast cancer does that to us! Just let it out!

    My surgeon's office called and scheduled me for a pet/ct in 3 weeks after my last ac, they said it is my post chemo scan. Oops, did they forget that I still have 12 weeks of abraxane/carbo? I told them to check with my mo to see if he wants the scan. I think bs misunderstood mo when they talked. Oh well, they will get it straightened out. I am nervous about a scan, but also want to see where I am, if nodes have shrank more, and hopefully nothing new shows up. Would they ever do surgery inbetween the ac and the abraxane/carbo? I think my mo told me it is more effective to to it all in sequence without a break for surgery.

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  • Cyborg
    Cyborg Member Posts: 848
    edited July 2011

    Bkj66 thank u for the support. It's been a very emotional day.

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  • twistedsteel
    twistedsteel Member Posts: 156
    edited July 2011

    I have some experience with the port not passing blood, bkj66.

    Mine does that regularly. Raise your arms above your head, take a deep breath and then cough while they try and suck blood. I got that stuff injected through mine too. Didn't do anything. When I got an experienced nurse, she taught me the arms, up, deep breath and cough routine. Try it with yours next time. Sometimes I have to do it a few times, but ultimately it works every time.

    TS 

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  • bak94
    bak94 Member Posts: 1,846
    edited July 2011

    Thank you twisted. We did try all the tricks though. She even had me get up and walk around, lift arms, cough, turn my head. I am wondering if she used the wrong size needle.

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  • ---
    --- Member Posts: 197
    edited July 2011

    bkj66,

    i am finished with A/C.  will be heading for #1 Taxol this coming Monday.  i am so glad to be over with A/C.

    Laureen

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  • ---
    --- Member Posts: 197
    edited July 2011

    MamaV and Cyborg,

    Congratulations to both of you!  Wishing you best of luck as you continue with all other treatments.

    Laureen

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