Hello!

Welcome!  Well, I can only say, it does get better.  Just yesterday I was feeling a little odd, kind of like I'm wearing rose colored glasses because for the longest time, I just feel fine and normal (like before cancer...).  I am fearing 'horrible outcomes" a lot less. Maybe I'm crazy, but it's a helluva lot better than the place I was in ...kind of like where you are now.  One thing that helped me was learning about all the things I can do to reduce risks like exercise, vitamins, good sleep and whatever you can do to reduce stress.  When radiation ends, you will feel a little weird because the treatment arm has stopped, that's when you begin to take matters into your own hands and do what you can to take care of You.  Then, things just slowly get back to normal. You just live, laugh, and go on.

It does get better, hard to believe right now, but it does.

welcome* glad you posted and were able to talk about what is going on with you.  this forum is really very helpful; supportive, caring and a variety of newbies....people just finishing up treatment and oldies.  ( am an oldie...lol...)  lots of experience and great ideas.....good sharing of emotions and fears....and recovery experiences.  putting "out" your feelings...thoughts and emotions is very healing in and of itself.  finding out that you are "ok" just where you are helps too. 

 'new normal" is really a part of all of this; and it will change from time to time.  what has helped me the most over the years is 1. exercise  2. self-advocating for myself medically 3. taking one day at a time and not getting so far ahead of myself and in the "what ifs" 5. eating fruit and veggies 6. rest when i need to and when i can 7. acceptance.  acceptance in the truth that i had breast cancer; got great treatment...(did everything possible) and i am still alive and living each day.  when i am sad or mad....that is how i feel....and when joyful and grateful;...that is my truth too.

never give up. keep on* post often or PM people. many of us are on facebookl. you are not along and remember....,"you had and have WAY more healthy cells then cancer cells....surgery, chemo  rads and hormone tx will  get the rest." 

diana

Hi tlundy,

Glad you found us!  As I've said before to other ladies this place have helped me immensely during my journey, although I still have my ups and downs.

I hope rads are going well for you.  For me personally it was SO much easier than the chemo was.  Made it until the last week w/out any burns and even then they disappeared quickly.

Hope to hear from you soon!

Sharon

Hello tlundy,  I haven't been posting much on the Stage III sites as I think that I am still coming to terms with my diagnosis and its been over a year already.  It took me a couple months after my BMX to get up the courage just to read through my path report.  I just wanted to hear it straight from the docs.  These discussion forums have given me so much consolation knowing that I am not alone with diagnosis and seeing all the great survivors...yeah!

So, apparently I have settled in to a remission and I am feeling great and will feel even better once I finish up the reconstruction project.  I recently took myself off the anti-depressant that my ONC prescribed for me while going through treatment and so far, so good.

Good luck to you on finishing up radiation.  I found the treatments themselves to be pretty easy, the daily trips got old very fast and I had to learn to pace myself when the radiation fatigue set in.  I remember one day driving over to radiation that I nearly pulled over to the side of the road to take a nap!  It can be hard, but cut yourself some slack and don't push it.  You can do it!

Getting back to "normal" can take some time. It's a new normal, too, so sometimes we don't realize when we've reached it. I found it when my dr appointments started to stretch out into every three months instead of every other week. I'm on an x4 months sched now...soon to become x6 months with my onc. I've stopped seeing the bs...there wasn't really anything for him to check since I had DIEP recon some time after my BMX. Having him feel my tummy boobs just didn't seem right.

So now I just see my onc and my gyn on a regular basis, which is almost normal. It's my new normal. I've put the thought of a recurrence in the very far back end of my mind. It only moves forward when my onc appt nears. There are no more scheduled scans...they will only happen if I have symptoms, so no "scanxiety" on a regular basis.

All those achievements will give you the luxury of concentrating on more normal things in your life and allow you to get back to living it.