Your Cancerversary: How do you figure it?

Rennasus
Rennasus Member Posts: 1,267
edited June 2014 in Life After Breast Cancer

How do you determine when your "cancerversary" is? 

Is it the date of the mammogram that changed your life? Is it the date the doctor called to tell you you had cancer? Is it the date you had surgery to remove the cancer, making you "cancer free"? I know physicians also use a date to determine that you are cancer free.

I'm wondering if there is a standard way to figure out when that date is. Any insight is appreciated!

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  • barbe1958
    barbe1958 Member Posts: 19,757
    edited April 2011

    I go by the day I heard my name and cancer in the same sentence. December 10th, 2008.

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  • Rennasus
    Rennasus Member Posts: 1,267
    edited April 2011

    Barbe, 

    I've been using my surgery date as my "cancerversary," but then I started seeing women refer to their date the way you have... as the day they "got the news" so I thought maybe I should ask how others figure it. Sounds like it varies by person?

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  • bingbing
    bingbing Member Posts: 82
    edited April 2011

    I go by the day I had sugery, and I was cancer free. May 18, 2006, will be 5 years next month.Hip hip hooray  Sharon

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  • Rennasus
    Rennasus Member Posts: 1,267
    edited April 2011

    Congrats Sharon, 5 years is cause for MAJOR CELEBRATION!! ;-)

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  • MBCR
    MBCR Member Posts: 161
    edited April 2011

    I celebrate on the day I was fininshed with all my treatments, like a 2nd birthday. Today is the anniversary of my surgery. I have a lot of mixed emotions.

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  • Harley44
    Harley44 Member Posts: 5,446
    edited April 2011

    Everybody's story is different, but...

    I celebrate on March 15, 2007  that is when my surgeon took IT out...

    I had a bilateral mastectomy on May 3, 2007  and the pathology came back all CLEAR...  I figure that means that my surgeon got it ALL when he did my biopsy....

    Harley

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  • Harley44
    Harley44 Member Posts: 5,446
    edited April 2011

    BTW, my onc. counts from when I finished chemo...  Oct. 9, 2007...  :(   but I never listen to him...

    Harley

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  • Rennasus
    Rennasus Member Posts: 1,267
    edited April 2011

    Ok, I am very happy to see everyone is all over the board on this one!

    I think I will celebrate Feb 3, which is the day I had my BMX — and the day they got the %$# out!

    ;-)

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  • hopeful34
    hopeful34 Member Posts: 1,569
    edited April 2011

    I was so happy to see this thread.  I was hoping for a more definitive answer, but it sounds like it's your own choice.  I found out I had BC one year ago yesterday, but I think I like the idea of my anniversary being the day I had my BMX. 

    JBinOK- Wow.  I wish I had your attitude.  I remember the day I found the lump, the day I went to the OB/GYN, mammo/US, biopsy, dx, surgeries, each individual chemo.....maybe I should take something to make me forget.  I am a little OCD though.  Good for you!

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  • Rennasus
    Rennasus Member Posts: 1,267
    edited April 2011

    Hopeful34: Yup, seems there is no hard-and-fast rule or determination for when (or if!) you decide to celebrate.

    Of course I like to make sure I do things "right" (a habit I am trying to let go of since BC), which is why I posted the question. And I am fascinated by what people select as "the day." Tks for sharing!

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  • barbe1958
    barbe1958 Member Posts: 19,757
    edited April 2011

    JB, for someone who doesn't care, you spend a lot of time on bco!! Why did you bother linking to and then posting on this thread if it means nothing? The question wasn't do you or don't you have a cancerversary, but how do you figure it. It's patronizing of you to post with that attitude.

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  • BarbaraA
    BarbaraA Member Posts: 7,378
    edited April 2011

    I'm with Barbe. The day I heard my name and cancer in the same sentence. And year one will be in 20 days.

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  • jo1955
    jo1955 Member Posts: 8,543
    edited April 2011

    I'm also with Barbe.  I comes down to a personal decision for everyone what date they use for their cancerversary.  For me, I will use my surgery date.  That was Aug 30, 2010.

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  • Harley44
    Harley44 Member Posts: 5,446
    edited April 2011

    Barbe, I agree...  Those dates are stuck FOREVER in my mind...  I will never forget the day I felt my lump.. 3/8/2007.  March 15 was my bx.  May 3 was the bilateral mast.,  Aug. 7 was my 1st chemo and Oct. 9th was my LAST chemo....   and Nov. 7 I had my reconstruction....

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  • Bren-2007
    Bren-2007 Member Posts: 6,241
    edited April 2011

    I count it  from the day of my surgery when the cancer was removed.  My fourth anniversary was a week ago.

    I think it is a huge milestone.  And it's important to me too.

    Bren

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited April 2011

    May '09 I felt the lump and had the gut feeling that it was cancer.

    October 6, 2009 finished chemo.

    December 1, 2009 lumpectomy

    March '10 finished radiation.

    I have an anniversary for each of these events. Wish I could just forget.

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  • Heidihill
    Heidihill Member Posts: 5,476
    edited April 2011

    It depresses me to think of cancerversaries. Those are dates I'd much rather forget. I prefer to think of Nedversaries. Unfortunately, I can only remember the month so any day in that month is fair game for a celebration.

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  • barbe1958
    barbe1958 Member Posts: 19,757
    edited April 2011

    JB maybe you've forgotten the etiquette of the board by not being on for so long. I have a great life outside of bco and have posted in the other thread where I DO agree with what you said. I call them as I see them! My comment obviously bothered you....sorry I hurt your feelings. And you don't "do" snide very well as you are here too! Maybe you just need to look up the definition for "patronizing" if you don't know what I mean.

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  • MRDRN
    MRDRN Member Posts: 537
    edited April 2011

    Good Morning Ladies,

    I just read this and it is no coincidence the TODAY is my Anniversary of getting a phone call from the Radiologist at Hopkins who was so compassionate on the phone.  As opposed to the cold PMD who called and said ...follow up in a month with another MRI and simply read me the report over the phone which I picked up myself before she got around to called me!! ...I called Hopkins and they took me right away!  I am forever grateful for that because they took me in and repeated the mammo, ultrasound, and biopsy ALL IN THE SAME DAY!  Their team followed up with decisions I was making for surgery.   Not everyone does this...the PMD NEVER called me back ...and I switched Doc's.   Some Doc's are too busy to care.

    Oh, yes and today is my 50th Birthday...I would like to say that I am having a HUGE party to celebrate, and then I am going off to Paris, this weekend to have an amazing adventure, but instead I come to this board, read what I so can relate to and go about my day.  THIS board has been a consistent place of information to support me through a very difficult year.  OH, someone says, but  you didn't need Chemo? Like the five surgeries, where not detrimental enough...Move on?  Well some of us are stronger than others.  Thanks to anyone who reads this and those who are brave enough to post their TRUE feelings, bless you.   I have met some very STRONG ladies here...we have to be, right?  We are survivors!

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  • barbe1958
    barbe1958 Member Posts: 19,757
    edited April 2011

    MRDN, you bring up a good point about TRUE feelings. Some women don't dig quite deep enough to acknowledge reality. They will probably have a breakdown/meltdown at some inappropriate point and that will be with a big dose of reality!

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  • elmcity69
    elmcity69 Member Posts: 998
    edited April 2011

    I'm with Barbe. Her point to JBinOk was, I think: if you don't agree with the idea or feeling regarding a "cancerversary", that is your right, but no need to post a seemingly snarky, dismissive response.

    anyway, getting back to business: i'm sitting here trying to decide! i think i originally chose date of diagnosis (9/24/09), but my chemo brain is getting in the way.

    think i'll stick with that. i had surgery 10/15/09, and i count my survivorship from then: which, to me, is the best part.

    most importantly: we are all still here on God's green planet - Smile

    xo

    janyce

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  • elmcity69
    elmcity69 Member Posts: 998
    edited April 2011

    oh and happy birthday, MRDRN! Hope you have a wonderful day and do something special for yourself. xo

    janyce

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  • barbe1958
    barbe1958 Member Posts: 19,757
    edited April 2011

    How remiss of me!! Of course!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEETIE!!!

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  • Rennasus
    Rennasus Member Posts: 1,267
    edited April 2011

    Happy Birthday MRDRN! 

    I also like the word "survivorship" that elmcity69 uses above.

    We are on this board, so we are all survivors — no matter which date we choose (or don't choose) to celebrate!

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  • MRDRN
    MRDRN Member Posts: 537
    edited April 2011

    Digging deep indeed! :)  Had an awesome "caramel" cake..yum!  Thanks Ladies, this Birthday was a much more meaningful :))))

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  • Harley44
    Harley44 Member Posts: 5,446
    edited April 2011

    yes, it matters not WHICH date you choose, the only thing that matters is that we are CELEBRATING our SURVIVORSHIP!!

    Love you all!!

    Harley

    P.S.  Happy Birthday, MDRN..  I always have a glass of Champagne, to celebrate my birthday!

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  • MRDRN
    MRDRN Member Posts: 537
    edited April 2011

    Thanks, heck yes, I may celebrate the one year  reconstruction date too!  Another chance to have cake! 

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  • bluewillowskys
    bluewillowskys Member Posts: 365
    edited April 2011

    i think for me I will celebrate when i get my last radiaton treatment and am free of being poked and prodded anymore.

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  • Rennasus
    Rennasus Member Posts: 1,267
    edited April 2011

    Bluewillow, let us know when that will be!

    For me it'll be Feb 3 — the date they got it outta me. ;-) 

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  • Gingerbrew
    Gingerbrew Member Posts: 2,859
    edited April 2011

    My thought is that if you have had cancer then you can call it any way you want to!

    Ginger

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