When it's check-up time...

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sta1129
sta1129 Member Posts: 71
edited June 2014 in Stage I Breast Cancer

does anyone else feel like their life freezes for a period of time? I was at a meeting this morning, and caught myself making no commitments. I realized I have done this the last couple of years until 'after the mammogram', like I'm putting life on hold until I'm sure I don't have to figure in surgery, chemo, whatever.

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  • SAMayoFL
    SAMayoFL Member Posts: 958
    edited April 2011

    I am 11 days post chemo and have my first PET scan on Friday.  My brain says there can not possibly be any cancer cells left with the chemo regime I have just finished.  No matter what my brains says, however, I am seriously terrified.  I am having major anxiety and am acting irrational like I did right after diagnosis.  I hope I don't go through this craziness everytime I have a scan or a checkup!  I am driving myself and my DH crazy!

    Good luck with your mammogram.  I hope we are both worried about nothing!

    Susan

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  • changes
    changes Member Posts: 622
    edited April 2011

    Hi,

    Yep, I'm still kind of putting my life on hold, waiting to be sure the scans tell me it's okay. I'm hoping this eventually fades. My oncologist assured me that the first two years are the worst, and that people tend to find it easier to move forward after that point. I hope that's true!

    Karen

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  • jrgolomb
    jrgolomb Member Posts: 1,236
    edited April 2011

    Absolutely I have put my life on hold.  I see the doc tomorrow and I dred the thought of any more tests being ordered.  I don't want to tell them about my lower back pain cause I know they'll be more tests! Yeah, no commitments.  I know exactly what you mean.

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  • annettek
    annettek Member Posts: 1,640
    edited April 2011

    I will chime in and say I agree...I never acted like this in my life until BC. I have my 3 month checkup with onc end of the month and am already freaking out...

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  • jo1955
    jo1955 Member Posts: 8,543
    edited April 2011

    Absolutely have put my life on hold.  I have not had a mammo since dx in Aug 10 and don't get that until June.  I was asked to be president of our local RV association chapter and I declined.  I told those that needed to know that I did not want to make any committments for a least a year but I would help out in other ways.  I feel I can only be away for no more than a week at a time.  So I know exactly what you mean.

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  • BarbaraA
    BarbaraA Member Posts: 7,378
    edited April 2011
    I have my one year mammo coming up on 4/26 and am already getting queasy about it. Frown
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  • marbletop
    marbletop Member Posts: 26
    edited April 2011

    I am four years out and am constantly freaked out over the next check up. I read self help books which make sense, but when it comes to those three month check ups I still worry. Good luck to all!

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  • marjie
    marjie Member Posts: 1,134
    edited April 2011

    How can we not worry?  I feel like as I move forward, my life will constantly revolve around cancer. I hate that!

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  • AmyIsStrong
    AmyIsStrong Member Posts: 1,755
    edited April 2011

    When I saw the cancer psychologist during chemo, she said that it is usually a two-week period prior to check ups/tests that the anxiety starts to build. She said the best you can do is stay busy, stay distracted and get through it.  Not exactly magic solutions from a psychologist! :) My last mammo, I did feel minor anxiety a few weeks before, culminating in some pretty strong worry the night before. But then I went, it was all fine and I relaxed again.

    Now I see the onc next week but since there aren't any tests, and she's going to ask how I'M doing (rather than take a test and TELL me something), I'm not nervous. I feel great and am doing fine so I figure she'll be glad to hear that, poke around a little and say see you in a few months. The tests are the parts that worry me, b/c I felt great when they FOUND the tumor, so obviously how I feel isn't any indicator.

    Hang in there ladies. This stuff sucks!

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  • sta1129
    sta1129 Member Posts: 71
    edited April 2011

    Thanks for replying - I feel less like I'm the only one in the world. Today's the mammo and bone stuff, so I feel like I'll be breathing again in a few hours. 

    And I planted seeds last night, just as a little statement of hope. 

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  • suzanneinphoenix
    suzanneinphoenix Member Posts: 208
    edited April 2011

    My ONC appointment is 4/13/11.....and I'm already dreading it.  I don't think any tests will be ordered, just the standard labs and blah blah blah. This is the one appointment that reminds me I'm a cancer patient. I feel like my life has been on hold since this whole drama started.....I like the idea about planting seeds.  Cool

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  • lauri
    lauri Member Posts: 267
    edited April 2011

    It DOES get better -- at year 5 a mammo or MRI or onc appointment is no different to me than a dental or eye checkup ... go through the appointment and get told " looks OK, come back in 6 months."    But the possibility of needing more treatments still is around -- when I was looking into new insurance I compared plans based on how well they would cover my expenses if I had chemo / radiation.

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