OMG They Found the Cure for Stupid

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  • konakat
    konakat Member Posts: 6,085
    edited March 2011

    This thread is hilarious!!!  Busy scribbling down recipe.

    But what type of coffee?  Expensive Starbucks or will anything do?  Or we could save time and head to Jamaica for some Blue Mtn coffee and some good pot.  Start a coffee enema fetish weekend at one of the Hedonist resorts?

    Hoggin' the pipe, puff, puffffffff, pass.

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  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 19,483
    edited March 2011

    Kona, we share here.

    Can't be decaf, can it?  I think it might be the caffeine that sucks the cancer right out.

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  • thegood5
    thegood5 Member Posts: 478
    edited March 2011

    Meece, you need to scoop up some of that soil from your garden, add some water (NOT from a plastic bottle) and make your own version of cancer curing mud.  Or take a nice mud bath with it.  I would like to put in my order for a bacon bra please.  But if you could use lean bacon, I would appreciate it, I've put on 20 lbs since chemo started.

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  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 19,483
    edited March 2011

    We could use turkey bacon, but really, let's get serious, can you really call that stuff bacon?

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  • Mazy1959
    Mazy1959 Member Posts: 1,431
    edited March 2011

    LOL I do indeed know where the cure guy is. If I can catch him..I'll let ya know LOL

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  • konakat
    konakat Member Posts: 6,085
    edited March 2011

    I think caffeinated is best -- you get the shakes and rattle that cancer right out.  Also burns calories.  Helps combat the inevitable munchies.

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  • Mazy1959
    Mazy1959 Member Posts: 1,431
    edited March 2011

    Konakat..You're spose to use the most expensive ,organic coffee there is  of course LOL And it must be luke warm.

    Did you know that for Pagets of the breast all you have to do is turn on a portable heater and put your breast as close as you can without burning it and hold it there for 15 min.  You do that every 6 hrs til all signs of cancer are gone LOLOLOL

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  • konakat
    konakat Member Posts: 6,085
    edited March 2011

    Oh wow, I knew there was a reason I cuddled my heating pad.  Organic, of course!!  Let's go to Hawaii for some Kona coffee.  Isn't there a crop or two of good stuff on the big island?

    Puff, pass.

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  • EmilyInOntario
    EmilyInOntario Member Posts: 626
    edited March 2011

    What kind of coffee for a coffee enema? Starbutts..

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  • Mazy1959
    Mazy1959 Member Posts: 1,431
    edited March 2011

    I wouldnt use Starbucks cause I like drinking it too much LOL.

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  • Alpal
    Alpal Member Posts: 1,785
    edited March 2011

    You won't believe this but Cancer Guy's sister has a new thread on the Alt. Forum. Wait - maybe it's not his sister, must be the knocked up gal from Texas. Anyway, check it out. Can't remember the exact title (asparagus brain) - something like THERE ALREADY IS A CURE AND IT'S BEING SUPPRESSED.

    Edited to insert correct name of thread 

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  • EmilyInOntario
    EmilyInOntario Member Posts: 626
    edited March 2011

    Alpal..

    Hmm..interesting. The poster of that thread just joined today and states they don't have breast cancer? What am I missing here.. 

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  • Alyson
    Alyson Member Posts: 4,308
    edited March 2011

    Had to leave to help a friend organise her kitchen. Came back and you had done over 4 pages. I have laughed till I cried. I think we found a few things that would have aided the cure or maybe were the reason for cancer..

    I need a big puff to calm myself down.

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  • Alpal
    Alpal Member Posts: 1,785
    edited March 2011

    I guess she's just being kind and sharing her knowledge with us. How sweet.

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  • EmilyInOntario
    EmilyInOntario Member Posts: 626
    edited March 2011

    Alpal..we should probably expect a visit from them then? I'm sure the smoke form the pot and the asparagus must be drifting over that way. I'm surprised nobody has called the fire department. I can hardly see my hand in front of my face in here. *L*

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  • EmilyInOntario
    EmilyInOntario Member Posts: 626
    edited March 2011

    Oh..I smell bacon..is someone's bra cooking?

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited March 2011

    I have enough mud for everyone. My only request is that if you accidentally suck of one of my equines while loading up you return them. (The mud makes them hard to see sometimes). Do you think it's real use is camouflage? Wasn't Cancer Man enveloped in some recently? THAT'S why no one can find him!

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  • susan_02143
    susan_02143 Member Posts: 7,209
    edited March 2011

    If the neighbors call the Fire Department, I suggest that you put on your asparagus hat. No fireman would even consider taking a breast-challenged woman with an asparagus hat to the police station. But if they do take you in, drink the mud first!

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  • crazy4carrots
    crazy4carrots Member Posts: 5,324
    edited March 2011
    You guys are SO funny -- Emily, Starbutts for a coffee enema??  ROTFLMAO!
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  • EmilyInOntario
    EmilyInOntario Member Posts: 626
    edited March 2011

    Susan..if we are wearing aparagus hats, bacon bras and drinking mud, I'm afraid they may be taking us to someplace OTHER than the police station ...

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  • Alpal
    Alpal Member Posts: 1,785
    edited March 2011

    Do they have on white coats? Might be a clue ....

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  • dutchgirl6
    dutchgirl6 Member Posts: 673
    edited March 2011
    I think that you are all forgetting an important aspect of the cure.  Remember to take it with a positive attitude!
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  • MBJ
    MBJ Member Posts: 4,352
    edited March 2011

    ROTFLMAO!ROTFLMAO!

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  • thegood5
    thegood5 Member Posts: 478
    edited March 2011

    ooooopps!  Sorry!  The bacon bra smell was mine...I was laying with a heating pad on my chest from my lumpectomy and I forgot to take my bra off.  Breakfast anyone?

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  • kelben
    kelben Member Posts: 269
    edited March 2011

    hmmm, mud with horses hiding in it, we should be able to do something with that

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  • Marple
    Marple Member Posts: 19,143
    edited March 2011
    I've been puffing away as I read all the posts.  I got so engrossed I forgot to pass.  I'm so stupid.Tongue out
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  • NeyNey
    NeyNey Member Posts: 33
    edited March 2011

    I received that FB "breast cancer awareness" message yesterday.....posting my status as banana????? Absurd!!!!!  

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  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 19,483
    edited March 2011

    I think you might be on to something with the camouflage, but maybe we are supposed to use it to hide from cancer so we won't catch it.

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  • Makratz
    Makratz Member Posts: 12,678
    edited March 2011

    While searching the internet all night for a cure for studity, the only thing that kept coming up was:  there is no cure for stupidity.  Hmmmm..... Maybe we should just email that back to people who email us THE cure for bc.

    Off to Starbutts for my morning enema.  Mmmmm, I can smell it now!

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  • thrmine
    thrmine Member Posts: 98
    edited March 2011

    So if we were children of the sixties, would we be obliged to our bacon bras.   The end result is the same I guess but we might gain a salad topping?

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