OMG They Found the Cure for Stupid

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  • thrmine
    thrmine Member Posts: 98
    edited March 2011

    I haven't had a turn to puff yet, but still, how did the bacon get on the stupid list?

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  • Makratz
    Makratz Member Posts: 12,678
    edited March 2011

    Bacon is 'cured' meat!

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  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 19,483
    edited March 2011

    My asparagus bra developers got off topic because they like their asparagus wrapped in bacon (And I couldn't find a picture of an asparagus bra).

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  • Elizabeth1959
    Elizabeth1959 Member Posts: 346
    edited March 2011

    This thread has been helpful as well as hilarious.

    I've learned that not only is breast cancer easily prevented through  proper diet , droopy boobs (underwire free) and early mammograms but now easily treated with a bacon bra and asparagus message.  I'm going to have to pass on the starbut enema, I don't even like to drink coffee.

    The treatment seems even easier to follow than the preventive measures.  I can't wait to get started

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  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 19,483
    edited March 2011

    There is no cure for stupidity because THEY have not found a way to make money off of the stupid afflicted.  At least not great sums of money on a constant flow, like THEY do with Cancer tx.

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  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 19,483
    edited March 2011

    BTW any of the bacon bras may be stuffed with your choice of fillings, ie asparagus and or cottage cheese.

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  • 208sandy
    208sandy Member Posts: 2,610
    edited March 2011

    O.K. you bunch of smarta**es (and I use the term fondly) my stomach hurts from reading this thread - Emily I'll never be able to go to Starbutts again without laughing hysterically - good work ladies!

    Hugs, Sandy

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  • badger
    badger Member Posts: 34,614
    edited March 2011

    OMG LMAO

    KonaKat - you're right, I've heard about a fab Hawaiian cure called Maui Wowie

    puff puff pass  :-)

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  • Makratz
    Makratz Member Posts: 12,678
    edited March 2011

    I saw this guy on the Boston area news today.  Is this who we are looking for?  Looks like he is trying to buy all the asparagus in this area.  I'm going to run out and get some now, before it's all gone.  I will stop at Starbutts first to get my dose!

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  • JanetinVirginia
    JanetinVirginia Member Posts: 1,516
    edited March 2011

    Hey!  I just read a new clinical trial is starting to compare treatments for stupid people.  So tell all the stupid people you know.  They get a choice of  coffee enema + rads or a lobotomy.  Can't wait to see survival & recurrence stats. 

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  • JanetinVirginia
    JanetinVirginia Member Posts: 1,516
    edited March 2011

    Oh no.  First a Bounty shortage and now asparagus????

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  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 19,483
    edited March 2011

    THEY are stock-piling it to keep it off the market.  We're going to have to grow our own, but how do you grow Bounty?

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  • thegood5
    thegood5 Member Posts: 478
    edited March 2011

    Paper comes from trees, so paper towels should be fairly easy to grow...just might take some time.  We just need a good lumberjack, which could be the Brauny man, but I don't think that brand soaks up pee as well as Bounty.  It's the quicker picker upper, unlike the joint we're sharing, the slower mellow downer.  I need to head to the local farm market now and grab some asparagus...I am hungry for an omlette for some reason and I am NOT taking out my asparagus implants for it.

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  • thegood5
    thegood5 Member Posts: 478
    edited March 2011

    Do you think the kid in that pic is in training to become the next cure guy?

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited March 2011

    I think there is a whole tribe of these asparagus people! The Cure Guy has been busy! They are going to be tough tribe to find. They pose as everyday people. We need to find some more recruits! I'm going to Dunkin Donuts and grab a cup of enema then post this picture in the post offices. Maybe with the help of the public we can locate the tribe!

    Photobucket

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  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 19,483
    edited March 2011

    Going back to the kid in the picture.  Doesn't he look a bit scared?  I think The Cure Guy is holding him hostage until he gets all of the asparagus.  The kid must be the son of the produce manager.

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  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 19,483
    edited March 2011

    You are right, they are everywhere!!!

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  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 19,483
    edited March 2011

    They've even infiltrated the Hollywood elite!

    It appears they have even recruited Mr. Bill!

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  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 19,483
    edited March 2011

    And Hello Kitty!    

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  • thegood5
    thegood5 Member Posts: 478
    edited March 2011

    Meece, I can't stop laughing!!

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited March 2011

    Photobucket

    And another.

    RECRUITS!!!!!!

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  • GirlFriday
    GirlFriday Member Posts: 461
    edited March 2011

    Why dost thou mock asparagus?  My dental hygenist's assistant told me that someone's mother that her husband works with has a rare kind of cancer that has responded through her own clinical trials!  One month she took it pureed daily and the tumors shrank. The next month she didn't take it and the grew. So she started taking it again, and voila!  The tumors shrank...EVEN while she was on Chemo!  If a dental hygenist assistant believes in it, it must be true because they are in the medical field! 

    As for the cause, don't you know it's because of every "poor, non-conventional" decision in your life?  You've been smited with cancer, duh!  Living in sin? Well here's breast cancer for you!  Drink a little too much? Here's your breast cancer.  Thought nasty thoughts about your MIL?  Pow...breast cancer for YOU!  And if it's God's will....well I guess I should stop harping on that. I've just heard it way way too many times. 

    Puff, Puff...If you don't have anything nice to say, please come sit next to me. Puff, puff...reload, Pass.

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  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 19,483
    edited March 2011

    This is a second sightingof this guy, does that mean something?

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  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 19,483
    edited March 2011

    And yet again???

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  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 19,483
    edited March 2011

    This guy appears to be trying to be unrecognizable.

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  • Elizabeth1959
    Elizabeth1959 Member Posts: 346
    edited March 2011

    I am so computer unsavey.  How do I add a photo i found online to my post?

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited March 2011
    Photobucket
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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited March 2011

    Photobucket

    ...and the poor children, forced to work long, hard hours. Their mouths are frozen open. These people must be stopped!

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  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 19,483
    edited March 2011
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  • Meece
    Meece Member Posts: 19,483
    edited March 2011

    They have ways of keeping the kids from talking, too!

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