Help me help my BFF

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lorrhaw
lorrhaw Member Posts: 751
edited June 2014 in Stage I Breast Cancer

I am a frequent poster in the Stage IV thread since, unfortunately, I was diagnosed with Stage IV breast cancer with a spinal met in January of 2010.  My breast friend on the planet who was a huge supporter to me over the past year was just diagnosed and had a double mastectomy this past Wednesday.  We live in different states and I will be traveling this coming Tuesday to be with her for  a week to help her out.  She has been told that she is Stage IIB since one lymph node was positive.   I know all about how they attempt to treat Stage IV but now I need information on what we can expect to be going through with her.  Do they typically do chemo for Stage IIB, what about radiation?  I am sure that she will be meeting with her docs later this week since she just got her path report back on Friday but in the meantime I would like to be forewarned about what she may be facing so that I can help her as much as possible.

Thanks for your help.

Lorraine

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  • Claire_in_Seattle
    Claire_in_Seattle Member Posts: 4,570
    edited February 2011

    Hi Lorraine,

    There is a thread called Stage II with lymph node involvement.  It will give you a good feel for what she is to expect.  Not everyone Stage II has a mastectomy, and this will mean a longer recovery time.

    She will most likely be doing chemo and radiation, but possibly not radiation.  The type of chemo will depend on tumor cell grade.  She will almost certainly be doing hormonal therapy if ER+/herceptin if HER2+.

    I wish her well. And good luck to you too. - Claire

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  • 1Athena1
    1Athena1 Member Posts: 6,696
    edited February 2011

    lorrhaw, chemotherapy will likely be recommended, and she might get either AC+T (a.k.a. TAC) or FEC. There could be other suggestions. If she has major comorbidities, the picture changes drastically. She may or may not get radiation - hers is a borderline case as far as the guidelines go. It may depend on how close her tumor was to the chest wall and on whether she has concerns about the chance of damage to the heart or lungs.

    In other words, she will get a TON of treatment that, unlike for Stage IV patients, is not geared at her individual situation but more driven by practice guidelines based on fear and statistics. While Stage IV folks usually decide on treatment based on what PET scans and MRIs and bone scans say about their individual bodies, she will be in a place in which there are no answers - only treatments thrown at her along with statistics and all manner of probabilities. There are a myriad of unknowns at this stage. It is possible that she may not need chemo or that it may do her great harm; science has not yet devised a personalized answer. I think the biggest frustration for her that you may become aware of is the sheer uncertainty involved at having the kitchen sink thrown at her for no clear reason. It may be hard to empathize with her if she complains considering that you are stage IV, but uncertainty can do evil things to one's mind.

    In short: she can say yes or no to treatment in a way that you cannot, but whatever her answer, it will have to depend on a guess as opposed to a scan of the body.

    Hope this helps.

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  • 3jaysmom
    3jaysmom Member Posts: 4,266
    edited February 2011

    i have iiB also,lorrhaw. it really depends on the pathology. mine recommende chemo; a/c and taxotere, but no radiation. they would've done chemo 1st to shrink it, but it was way aggressive, so i got a bmx, then chemo. no rads.. you'll be helping her just by being by her side.

       you may not know the tx side of it; but you sure know the emotional side, and can advise her also, based on your own fighting spirit. i will have both of you in my thoughts...   be well. take care of yourself, and your friend.      3jaysmom

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